Words Will Never Hurt Me: Happier Ending

by Master Jenn Kenobi (quigonjdi1@aol.com)

Obi-Wan picked up his lightsabre and pressed the blade end over his heart. His thumb moved to the switch.

"NO!" Obi-Wan's lightsabre flew out of his hands and into those of his master.

His eyes widened as he met Qui-Gon's fierce, yet panicked gaze briefly before he dropped his head and bent into a supplication pose. Now he would have more to add to those voices; now he would hear again how unworthy he was. He couldn't bear it. "Just let me go. It is my time," he whispered.

Qui-Gon knelt beside Obi-Wan, reaching to lift the young man's head. "No, Obi-Wan, it is not." With a saddened heart he noted the absence of the braid and the blood left behind. "Oh, Padawan. Why?" Tears filled the master's eyes as his fingertips brushed the raw skin.

Obi-Wan kept his gaze to the ground. He really was a failure. He couldn't even do this right.

Qui-Gon felt the trembling and could see the misery, even if he couldn't feel it through the shields Obi-Wan retained. His Padawan wouldn't answer him. Instead he seemed to be shrinking further away mentally. "No! Don't! Don't leave, Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon pulled the young man into his arms and poured all of his feelings into their bond, pushing against the shields until they crumbled.

Depression, depreciation and despair buffeted Qui-Gon. He was shocked to feel the depth of it. He had never realized. Tears streamed down the master's face as he rocked Obi-Wan in his arms. He continued to send all his love and respect through the bond. "Oh, Obi-Wan. I do want you. I was going to ask if you would partner with me after you were knighted. It was a stupid argument. I didn't mean it that way. I love you."

"No," Obi-Wan choked out between sobs. He didn't want Qui-Gon's pity. He didn't want pretense just to appease his battered soul.

"Yes," Qui-Gon whispered. He brushed his lips against Obi-Wan's forehead. "Yes, my Obi-Wan. Feel it. My soul can't lie."

"Will he be all right?"

Qui-Gon glanced over at Bant before turning back to look through the small window in the door. Inside, Obi-Wan was speaking to a soul-healer. "He will be. It will take time and all of our support, though." His brow furrowed. "If I hadn't looked to speak with him on the ship..." his voice faded out.

Bant touched Qui-Gon's sleeve. "But you did. And you got back here in time."

"Thank the Force. I couldn't have lost him. I won't leave him again."

<fini>