When Finally Between Us

by HiperBunny

Title: When Finally Between Us

Series: Polarity

Author: HiperBunny

Email: hiperbunny@hotmail.com,

Fandom: SW: The Phantom Menace

Paring: Obi-Wan/Qui-Gon

Rating: NC-17

Category: Slash, First Time, AU, Romance

Caveat: M/M sex, AU, true love. Issues with these? Run away.

Status: New; Complete

Date: Feb 15, 2000

Archive: M_A yes

Witnesslist Category: Inadmissible in Court

Summary: Obi-Wan tries to wrap his mind around a very pleasant concept

Notes: This was a gift from my Obi-Wanmuse to my PadaWan kriski. He thinks I'm neglecting her and has a tendency to be vocal on the subject of Padawanian neglect.

Thanks to Mrs.Hamill for putting up with my shyte. And for preventing me from making a serious, serious continuity error.

This isn't really a series. Just a pair of companion pieces.

Disclaimers: Not mine, no money. No, really. **This is not the slasher you are looking for.**

When finally between us
  A compromise was made
That we would be all things,
  One to another
Discovered, then it was,
  That acceptance of the inevitable
Makes an easier path to walk
  Out into starry destiny

--Jody Marie "Polarity"

I don't know how it came to this. I only know I'm glad it did. You're asleep in your bed, but I'm awake, cup of tea cooling on the desk between the keyboard and the screen. I have to make this real, somehow. I have to make this something I can understand. It seems so far outside the realm of possibility, I can't wrap my mind around it. Maybe if I put the words down here, where I can see them, everything will become clear.

I made love to my Master.

No. It's just too big. That's just- too much and to unreal. Let's start smaller. Let's step back and see how the hell this happened. I was sitting on the sofa, right over there on that sofa, reading- something, I can't remember what. Actually, I was dawdling, drawing pictures on the carpet with my toe then erasing them with my foot. I was waiting, but I didn't know for what. Just waiting, as had become my habit over the years.

After my Trials it was never suggested that I move out of my room. I didn't want a new room, we continued working together, the transition from student and teacher to working partners just as smooth as your skin-

It was an easy transition, not like this one. This is monumental, it has rocked me to the core. I've lost my center, my footing, and I can't say I'm missing it all that much. Maybe it is the lateness of the hour. Maybe it's the fact that my throat is still raw from the screams of pleasure you drew out of me. Maybe it's the fact that I had to wash my hands of your semen before making my tea, before touching the keyboard. Whatever it is that has shoved me this far afield of my normal, balanced self- I think I could get used to it.

Anyway, I was sitting there on the sofa, waiting for you to come in. I think we had plans for dinner, yes? Someplace outside the Temple. You looked so tired. I chucked those plans right the hell out the window and started fixing your favorite sandwich. You laughed and said I was spoiling you. I laughed back and said it wasn't a habit I planned on breaking anytime soon. And you got- quiet. Not your normal silence, your pauses for thought. This was a quiet I'd never heard from you before. And my silence answered, in a new tone. I turned around just in time to see you twisting my braid around your wrist, stroking that lock of hair you wear as a bracelet, as you've taken to doing when hit by sudden realization.

I reached up and tugged on the ear ring you'd given me as a Knighting gift. Your show that I was indeed my own person, assisting me in doing what you had so long forbidden. Your eyes meet mine, we glance away, postponing what lay between us.

It was so SUDDEN! I've worked beside you for most of my life, held you while you wept of a broken heart, when some rat-bastard jilted you or loss and time overtook you. And you've pushed and harassed me through almost every major event in my life, from apprenticeship to training, to knighthood and beyond. But there had never been this- tension between us. They say all students love their teachers, but I never did. I just- didn't think of you that way. I'm dead certain you never thought of ME that way.

Until tonight. Until now. Great glory hallelujah, we finally had a good idea between us.

So I brought you your sandwich and a cup of punch, sat on the floor beside your chair and tugged your boots off. Your foot isn't healing like it should be. Torn muscles shouldn't be this difficult to repair. I start my massage, preparing to encourage some more healing in you. I notice how soft your skin is, how warm, right between your toes and I watch the flesh change colors as I work on relaxing you this way.

And you moaned. Not the way you normally do when I'm doing your feet. This was a moan I recognized, though. You moan that way at night when you think I'm too deeply asleep to hear you and whoever you brought home. I imagine you've heard me moan that way a time or two. We're healthy, attractive men sharing quarters. Sounds such as these are likely to be overheard, especially when you consider the amount of time we've lived together. But I'd never brought that sound from you before. I discovered that I really, really liked it.

So I did my little healing thing while you finished up your sandwich. Then stealthily, like a spy in hostile territory, I sent my fingers out on a recon mission above your ankles. You seemed unaware of my infiltration for the longest time, but I could hear your breathing alter, and the scent of you changed. Finally I looked up at you. You were watching me.

It was a new look between us. I can't begin to imagine how many times we've seen one another. Thousands? Millions? Probably more than that. There were times in my life where I swore deep and meaningful oaths if only you would suddenly appear in whatever shitstorm I'd landed in, if only you'd come and rescue me. You always did. And how many times was your face the only one I wanted to see as I followed leads and picked my way through treacherous places to grab you by the hair and pull you out of hell? Hundreds, at least. How is it possible for us to find a new way to see one another, after all this time? But we did. My gaze never fell on you with such heat and weight before now. I looked at you as a sun looks upon its twin.

We're perfectly matched. How could we not be, after all this time? You laid the foundation for almost everything I know, then gave me room to grow into the man I am. I grew up around you, it would seem, filling in the places you left empty, twining myself into the protective latticework you provide. So slipping up onto your lap and brushing my lips against yours- is it any wonder that it felt so ultimately RIGHT?

No wonder at all.

We've called each other by name for years now. Why did I call you Master when at last our lips parted? Why did you call me Padawan, in reply? How hard do old habits die? But that was right, too, in that moment. And later, seconds later when we began undressing one another, it was just as right that I moaned your name into your hair while your tongue and teeth found my nipples.

You're ticklish, by the way. In case no one ever told you. I think, by the time we'd unbound one another's hair and I was brushing my shoulder-length locks over your ribcage, you were beyond caring. But oh how you laughed and pled for me to stop, to go on, to never leave you. I won't. I'll never leave you. We are as bound together as two lifelong friends can be, and now the bonds are stronger, deeper and all the sweeter for our newest sort of union.

Sweet my love, this is a union I can crave forever.

I was surprised at the taste of your cock, by the way. I would have thought one so- manly- as yourself would be musky, tasting of your strong personality. You are salty, but mild and soothing. An altogether pleasing juxtaposition, to my way of thinking, but in truth there is no flavor you could bear that I would find unappealing. Your hips are just as strong as they look, and I love the feel of your flex and bend when you thrust into my mouth. Your hands are strong, but gentle, as I have long known. The dexterity with which your fingers wove into my hair and soothed me was quite astonishing. I adore you for it.

And when finally you drew me upwards, cradling me against your chest, between your thighs and whispered "Make love to me, Obi-Wan. Make love to me for all time." Is there any power in the universe that can make me deny so beautiful a plea as this? By all that is holy, I hope there is not.

You yield so sweetly, it is a dangerous addiction I am courting. The elegant parting of your legs, the bend and curve of your arms as you pull me to you, the sighs and pink flicker of tongue across your lips as I ease my fingers slowly into you- a portrait worth the making, O my Qui-Gon. I lay as close to you as I could while preparing the way for us. You drove me near mad with your begging and your kisses, nearly ended all possibility of that completion with your clever hands. We have always been good together, and in this the standard held quite true.

So I knelt between your legs and slipped my body into yours, joyful that I had this pleasure of you before you had it of me. I know that may sound odd, with everything else we are to one another, but this way- it has removed the last scraps of the Masterly FaÃade from between us. Why that should be, I have no idea. But I looked into your eyes, kissed your mouth and thrust into you, knowing full well that for you I was dismantling the remnants of the Padawanian Mystique. Now we are completely, honestly ourselves to one another, and all the rest but stepping stones that brought us to this place.

The moonlight bathed your skin with a ghostly glitter, catching and pooling on the droplets of moisture our exertions brought to your skin. I admired and kissed those phantom diamonds as your legs and arms pulled me down upon you, drew me in deeper and demanded a more authoritative copulation. I drew it out between us, this pleasure and communion, for as long as I could bear. Then, surrendering to the inevitable, I slipped my hand between us and pleasured you more fully, creating our orgasms as near to one another as I could.

I confess, I wish I could have more clearly observed your climax. Then again, I do look forward to learning those expressions of you in the future.

I hear you stirring in the bedroom, so I suppose I should return to your side. I still think this is the most astounding thing that has ever happened to me. I've searched for love at every turn, on every world and in every being that held any hope whatsoever of providing it to me. I know you have staged quests of your own and found as few answers as I have. What wandering fools we are, my dearest friend. Why did it take so long for us to remember where we found every other thing that made life worth living?

It has helped, the writing of this. I'll probably leave it up for you to find with your morning mail. No point in hiding it, and there is a sort of lyrical quality that I believe you'll enjoy. Tonight I made love to my Master, and discovered the final key to the partnership of a lifetime.