Summary: somewhat (more than somewhat--you can decide?) weird
little alternative-universe scenario for TPM
Pairing: Q/O, natch
Rating: PG-13 for violence. No real smut to be found (sorry!)
except a little smooching and touching
Spoilers: yes for TPM
Additional notes: This is written to follow my earlier story,
"Meditations"...though if you're not keen on AU fics, you can
skip this one and let the previous story stand by itself. I
just had the idea get stuck in my head after reading up on Jedi
talents the other night.
Feedback: always welcome. If any of y'all actually like this
one, I just might continue with the time line in the future, so
let me know. Though I fear this may be the last fic I have time
to finish before having to get back to work finishing my
thesis, ugh!
Archive: master_apprentice, and my fiction page
(http://members.aol.com/amyaallen/sidewinder.html)
His was the face of pure evil, the Dark Side incarnate. He
fought with no restraints, no honor, no regard for the
corrupting of his spirit through the dark forces he summoned.
There was nothing left within him to corrupt. He was nothing
but a hate-filled, hollow vessel for the Dark Side. His only
purpose was destruction and revenge.
Obi-Wan Kenobi had never imagined facing such an enemy. The
Sith were the material of history and legend, an enemy long ago
defeated...or so the Jedi had thought, so he had been taught as
a child. Now, Obi-Wan and his master were caught in a battle
with this remnant of the past--a battle for their lives, and
the lives of those they were sworn to protect.
He would not let his master down. He would not let any
of them down.
The Force surged through him as he fought, as he mirrored
Qui-Gon's actions, acting in synchronicity with his master as
they had always done, in every fight before. Yet this one was
different. Their enemy--the Sith--was trying to use the Dark
Side to break his opponents' concentrations. Obi-Wan felt the
cold, sickening tendrils slithering around them, trying to
constrict and sever the link between master and padawan,
searching for any weakness.
They ran, attacked, blocked deadly blows repeatedly. He could
not stop to think. He could do nothing but let the Force guide
him, act on instinct, anticipate his opponent's strikes. Yet he
found this to be more difficult with each passing moment as the
Sith's dark power continued to pummel him and confuse his
senses. Had Qui-Gon ever faced such an enemy before? Obi-Wan
wondered. His training had never prepared him for such an
opponent, but he tried not to give in to fear. Even so, Obi-Wan
could feel the connection to his master faltering, weakened
under the stress of the attack
He could not lose that connection! His life, and the lives of
so many others, depended upon this battle.
His moment of fear betrayed him, however; it was all the
darkness had been waiting for. The Sith lunged at him and he
lost touch with his master with a painful snap in his
mind. His sense of balance disrupted, the next thing he knew he
was stumbling, falling...
...falling...
At the last second he summoned the Force to soften his landing
on the deck below. What should have been a bone-shattering
impact left him merely dazed, and he quickly rose to his feet,
determined to rejoin the battle...determined not to let his
master down. He looked upward and sought out Qui-Gon and his
opponent, seeing them continue the fight above him. He leapt up
to rejoin them, propelled by the Force and by his need to aide
Qui-Gon. His master needed him. The elder Jedi was a strong
fighter but this challenge was too great to let him face it on
his own. Obi- Wan raced after the two of them, reaching out for
his master mentally, trying to reconnect.
I'm coming, master...
He ran after them, but his feet could not propel him forward
fast enough. A split-second too late, the barriers hummed to
life, separating him from the others.
No! he screamed silently in frustration. Dammit,
no!
Only one barrier separated the Sith from Qui-Gon, but many more
stood between Obi-Wan and his master. Looking toward the dark
figure, pacing like a caged animal and sneering at the two
Jedi, Obi-Wan knew this had all been his plan.
Separate us...then take us on one by one...oh, master,
please, be careful...wait for me...
Obi-Wan could not even reach his master mentally. The Sith was
blocking him, and Qui-Gon was deep in meditation--waiting,
calm, while Obi-Wan's patience was stretched beyond its limits
until he thought he would go mad.
The barriers cycled open and Qui-Gon leapt at the Sith. Obi-Wan
raced forward yet was stopped at the last barrier, unable to do
anything but watch. Qui-Gon fought with a ferocity Obi-Wan had
never seen before, but still the padawan could see that alone,
his master could not match the Sith's fury. Obi-Wan struggled
in vain to use the Force to open the last barrier, yet it would
not yield. He was not strong enough to open it.
He gasped and looked on in horror as the Sith struck Qui-Gon on
the chin, catching the Jedi off-guard. But it was nothing
compared to the horror that then unfolded before Obi-Wan's
eyes.
"NO!"
The scream was ripped from his throat as he watched his master
fall to the ground, his life- force fading away as the Sith
stood over his body in triumph.
"Obi-Wan...Obi-Wan!"
Still screaming, the padawan was shaken awake, though his mind
refused to let go of the image of his master's death.
"Obi-Wan, calm yourself! It was only a dream."
A dream? Confused, disoriented, Obi-Wan blinked and
tried to slow his racing heartbeat. "A dream...master...?"
In the darkness of their chambers, the lights dimmed for sleep,
he was still able to see Qui- Gon's face just a few inches from
his own. The elder Jedi's eyes were filled with concern. His
touch was enough to make Obi-Wan shudder...
...As if I am being touched by a ghost.
"Padawan. It is only me," Qui-Gon offered. "Relax, let it go.
The dream is over."
"Oh, master..." Relief flooded through Obi-Wan. He drew himself
tightly against the other man's body, needing to feel the
comfort of his presence, desperate to reassure himself that his
master was alive. "Master..."
He could not shake the chill that had taken hold of his heart,
the touch of the Dark Side that he had felt so strongly in his
dream...his vision. He knew that was what it had been: a vision
of the future.
"It wasn't a dream. It was prophecy," Obi-Wan spoke in a hushed
voice. "I have seen the future...what awaits us on Naboo."
"Do not rush to judgement, Obi-Wan; the future is a delicate
thing. Visions can simply be a sign of the fears we must
acknowledge, and then let go."
"I know, I understand that well enough. But this...it was too
real. Too clear. I have seen glimpses, shades of future events
before, but nothing like this. Never with such clarity." He
paused, taking a few moments to try to clear his head. He took
solace in Qui-Gon's embrace, the calm he radiated, which helped
soothe the young Jedi's anxiety. Qui-Gon waited patiently,
saying nothing until his padawan was ready to continue.
"Master, I saw...we were fighting the Sith. The one who
attacked you on Tatooine. I felt such pure evil within him. I
have felt the touch of Dark Side before but never so strong,
never so focused in one individual--as if he were black hole,
determined to absorb all light, to leave only nothingness."
"Yes. The Dark Side is strong in him. Very strong," Qui-Gon
agreed, and admitted, "I was rather ill-prepared to meet such a
challenge when we first encountered him."
"We are still ill-prepared to meet him. That is what I have
seen. He will use the Dark Forces to separate us, and then..."
"Yes?" Qui-Gon prodded gently.
Obi-Wan closed his eyes and once more saw the lightsaber thrust
into his lover's body. "I watched him kill you, master, as I
stood helpless to stop him, to do anything." He opened his eyes
and continued, "It was not an experience I wish to repeat.
Once, as only a vision, was more than sufficient."
If Obi-Wan's words surprised his master, Qui-Gon didn't show
it. He merely reached out and brushed his apprentice's cheek
lightly...and in his eyes, Obi-Wan saw a great sadness.
He knows I speak the truth. He knows this will happen!
"You have seen this as well," Obi-Wan stated more than asked,
as comprehension dawned. "That is why I sensed unease in you
before...why you allowed us this...indulgence...while on a
mission." Earlier, Qui-Gon had surprised him by granting them
the union of the flesh, something Qui-Gon normally denied his
apprentice while they were on a mission. It had struck Obi-Wan
as unusual at the time, but he had not thought to question it.
Now, he understood, although the Jedi master answered him with
only a vague confirmation of his fears.
"I have only sensed that the future is...uncertain, padawan.
However, we must not let our fears rule us as we go forward
tomorrow. We must have faith in the Force, and let go of our
fears."
Obi-Wan clasped the hand still resting against his cheek,
fighting back the desperation inside him, the tears of grief he
felt for a man who was not yet dead. I'm not ready to lose
you! How can I go through with this mission if I know it will
end in your death? he thought but did not speak. He had not
seen how the battle would end. He did not know if he too would
die at the hands of the Sith; he only knew that with his master
dead, he would have nothing left to live for. There had to be a
way, some way to keep the darkness from getting the chance to
separate them...why else would the Force have granted him this
vision of the future?
The answer came to him suddenly. "Master, if the future is
uncertain, I have but one request."
"Yes?"
Obi-Wan drew in a deep breath. "Before we reach Naboo, I wish
to complete the Life Bond with you."
Qui-Gon's eyes widened; with this statement, at least, Obi-Wan
had surprised him. "Obi-Wan, you know that I wish nothing more
than to share that bond with you, but now is not the time to
take that final step. Not until after--"
"--after the trials, I know that was what we agreed. But there
will not be time then. If we do not do it now, I know we
will never get the chance. The Life Bond is the key, our
key to defeating the Sith."
"But you are not ready--"
"I am ready to face the trials, you said so yourself. Do you
doubt I will succeed?"
"No, of course not."
"Then I am ready to take this step now. I have no doubts. I am
certain of my feelings, my commitment to you. My love. For
years now I have dreamed of the day when the Force could unite
us truly as one. Do you not feel the same for me?"
"Of course I do. My only concern has been ensuring that you
truly wished to take this step, that you were mature enough to
understand all that it entails. There is no way to sever the
bond once complete--"
"--except through death. I know. I accept this, for I can think
of nothing that I want more in my life than to be forever at
your side. Master," he implored, sensing Qui-Gon was still
doubtful, "I know I am not as strong in the Force as you are
now. Yet I cannot question the vision I have seen, and my
knowledge that this is the only way to change the future as I
have seen it. We need the strength of the Life Bond to meet our
opponent and succeed. Will you trust in my conviction as I have
often trusted in yours?"
The master Jedi was silent for some time, studying his younger
lover, his thoughts closed to him for agonizing minutes. But
then relief flooded Obi-Wan's mind as Qui-Gon nodded his head
gently. "Yes, Obi-Wan, I will. Though promise me that if we do
this, you will not face the future with fear, only with faith
in the will of the Force. Tell me this and I will complete the
Bond with you tonight."
"I promise. After all, there will be nothing to fear any more,"
Obi-Wan answered with a smile, reaching out to touch his
master's face. Joy filled him, and he leaned in to claim his
Qui-Gon's lips, to kiss him with all the power of his love and
gratitude.
Qui-Gon eventually broke the kiss, and murmured close to his
apprentice's lips, "Then we should begin now. We may have just
enough time before landing to complete what is necessary and to
allow ourselves time to begin to adjust." Qui-Gon rose into a
meditative position, the blanket falling away from his naked
form. Obi-Wan did the same, sitting and facing his master,
trying to calm his excitement. This was the moment he had
dreamed of--the one he had waited for more than passing the
trials, more than anything else in recent years. Perhaps all of
his life.
The Life Bond was the highest level of commitment a Jedi could
make to another. It was the complete union of the Force between
two beings that, when complete, would leave neither whole
without the other. Though separate in body, their spirits would
be united as one, able to share thought and feeling, able to
amplify each other's abilities as needed. Obi-Wan could think
of nothing he desired more than to share such a union with
Qui-Gon, and he knew that if they could make this commitment,
they would have the strength to meet the challenge before them.
He knew this as he had never been so certain of anything
before in his life.
"What do I need to do, master. Lead and I will follow."
"Give me your hands. We will meditate together, entering the
deepest level of communion with the Force. Beyond that, simply
trust me, and do not be afraid. No matter what you feel, trust
that I am there. I will catch you if you fall...I will be there
to guide you back."
"Of course, master."
Qui-Gon's large, warm hands clasped his own, and the connection
was immediate, powerful. Obi-Wan closed his eyes and felt the
Force flow through him...between them. He surrendered himself
to it, following Qui-Gon through each deeper level of
meditation, every stage he had mastered over his years of
training. Gradually he lost all sense of himself in the ebb and
flow of energy between them, until that was all he was aware
of--the energy, the Force...and Qui-Gon. His master. His lover.
His heart, and soon to be his soul.
He was not afraid.
He knew nothing of what would come next. Only a master such as
Qui-Gon possessed the knowledge and ability to manipulate the
Force to complete a Life Bond. Such knowledge was not revealed
to a padawan because of the danger and risk of misusing it. He
trusted his master completely and surrendered to his will, to
the will of the Force.
After some time, he heard his master's voice in his mind.
It is time. Are you certain you wish to do this, Obi-Wan?
Assure me once more.
Yes, Qui-Gon. My master. I love you, and I am ready.
As am I, my beloved. Where there were two, there will be
only one.
Silence.
Nothingness, like the empty vacuum of space between galaxies.
Emptiness and peace.
And then...
Light, so bright, blinding, searing his eyes. Chaos erupted all
around him, as fire seared his body, leaving him in agony.
Infinite, unthinkable pain screamed through him; he felt as if
the Force were tearing him asunder, ripping him apart,
scattering his body and mind in a thousand different directions
at light speed, scattering him like the stars in the sky...
QUI-GON! was the last thought he managed, before the
chaos consumed him entirely.
And it was over.
There was no more pain, only a feeling of falling, of his
scattered thoughts and being coming back together, but in a new
pattern.
I will catch you when you fall, Obi-Wan.
A new tapestry of life.
Master?
Yes. I am here.
Entwining with the pieces of another, he felt himself becoming
whole again, creating one where before there had been two.
Qui-Gon...
Yes, Obi-Wan. Now...It is done.
He opened his eyes, feeling dizzy as the world came back into
focus around him.
He could see Qui-Gon sitting across from him, just as before.
And, at the same time, he could see himself through his
master's eyes, see the look of wonder on his own face. It was
making his head spin. Exhausted and feeling ill, he collapsed
onto the blanket with a groan. "Master..."
Shhh, the disorientation will fade, give it time,
Qui-Gon assured him, gathering the young apprentice's body
delicately against his own.
I should hope so, and that the time will pass quickly. Being
in two places at once is rather...confusing.
You will adjust. Center yourself back into your body, you
can do it. Just relax, and let the Force guide you there.
He followed his master's instructions, and then sighed in
relief as he felt his sense of balance return. His head was
still buzzing, and he could still feel the Bond between them
like a new sense. Thankfully, though, he no longer was feeling
so nauseous.
"Better, now, yes?"
"Yes. Although you could have warned me a little better about
what to expect. It rather felt as if I were dying, and in a
most unpleasant fashion."
"In a way it is dying. Dying and rebirth." Qui- Gon's lips
brushed his ear, his neck, his gentle kisses spreading
reassuring warmth through Obi- Wan's body. Now, we really
must try to rest, padawan. Give the Force time to complete the
Bond.
"Yes, master." Thank you, for this gift.
No, my beloved. Thank you for wishing to share yourself with
me. You bring me such happiness; you complete me. We will shape
the future together, Obi-Wan.
Yes, we will... the young Jedi thought back, before
surrendering himself to his body's need for rest.
Nothing would stand between them now.
They moved and struck against the enemy as one. The dark power
of the Sith thrashed against the Jedis' senses, trying to fight
their bond even as he struck at them individually with his
lightsaber. Yet now, unlike in the dream, Obi-Wan fought with
no fear. No desperation. All he felt was the calm certainty
that they would win. The power of the Light Side coursed
through his body and his master's, uniting them, driving them
to act in perfect unison. There was no thought, only feeling.
No struggle to maintain their Bond, no chance for their enemy
to break what had been forged by the Force and their love.
When he had awoken after the bonding, he had felt a strength
such as he'd never before imagined. He could reach out at any
moment and share in Qui- Gon's thoughts and feelings. The
closeness, which before they only could reach at the height of
passion, now filled him without effort. Now, as they fought,
that closeness ensured their success against the solitary foe.
When Obi-Wan would begin to falter, within a heartbeat he could
feel Qui-Gon's strength surge through him, bolstering his
efforts. When he sensed his master close to making the
slightest misstep, he would lash forth and divert the Sith's
attention, or propel his master to correct his movements.
Back and forth, the Force resonated between them.
Leap. Spin. Strike. Defend. Move. Protect.
Every movement on instinct, every act by the will of the Force.
The Sith's mask of rage did not frighten Obi-Wan. His anger and
hatred could not cloud the Jedi's mind. The darkness could not
touch him, could not cause fear to take hold. Thoughts of his
nightmarish vision were now far behind him, because he knew he
and Qui-Gon had changed the course of Fate this day. The Dark
Side would not have a victory, not even a partial one.
Pain shot through his arm--the Sith had managed to land a
glancing blow on Qui-Gon, and the pain echoed through the
padawan's body. He summoned the Force to give his master the
strength to ignore the pain, to continue the fight.
Thank you... the thought flashed through his mind.
Not your time, master. Not this time, he answered as he
charged against the Sith not with rage but with his senses
afire with the Force.
His opponent was strong, but not ready, alone, to meet their
combined strength. Eventually, the Sith made a small misstep,
his foot landing only partly on the edge of the narrow platform
above the power core. Without hesitation Obi-Wan struck
forward--and in an instant, found his lightsaber buried deep
into the dark warrior's chest. Fiery eyes blazed into his for a
moment, and then the wounded Sith fell backwards, tumbling off
the platform.
Obi-Wan watched the Sith fall, until the body was swallowed by
the black heart of the pit. Qui- Gon's hand rested upon his
shoulder, as his eyes traveled the same path.
They stood in silence until Obi-Wan finally felt the tinge of
pain in his left arm again and observed, "Your arm..."
"Not serious. We can tend to it later."
Obi-Wan could not lift his eyes yet from the pit below them. "I
feel no triumph in his death."
"You fought not out of rage, but in defense. Killing is never
easy for one who follows the Light, nor should it ever be. Yet
sometimes, it is necessary." Qui-Gon squeezed his shoulder, and
Obi-Wan felt a wave of affection from his master. You have
made me proud. You will be a great Jedi, Obi-Wan, greater than
I, someday.
But only because of you, master. And never without you with
me. Obi-Wan tried to reach out and feel any tremor in the
Force, any indication that their dark foe was dead. But he
could feel nothing. "I want to believe we will not see this one
ever again, that he truly is dead. Yet why do I sense that this
fight is not over?"
"I share your suspicions. The struggle against the Dark Side is
eternal. Until the Force can be united, this battle will never
be finished." He heard Qui-Gon let out a sigh, and then the
master said, "Come, Obi-Wan, it is time to ensure our allies
meet with success and have captured the Viceroy. We must make
sure Anakin is still safe."
"Yes, of course." The boy...he would accept his master's
dedication to training this one. He knew there was no way
Anakin could come between them now. He would even help his
master instruct the child, even if the council opposed them
both.
Obi-Wan turned away from the pit and toward Qui-Gon...his other
half. We will battle the darkness together. Always.
Yes, always. Together.
The two Jedi smiled, sharing knowledge of a future that was now
theirs to create. And as one, they ran and hurried to rejoin
the fight.
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