Summary: Well, it had to happen. My take on the whole 'one of
the guys is pregnant' discussion on the list yesterday.
Category: humor, romance
Rating: S for atrociously silly!
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine. They'd probably disown
me after this story anyway. Knocked it out (or should I say
knocked it up) in about an hour. Mistakes are my bad.
Feeback: sure, tell me how crazy I am.
Qui-Gon stood before the assembled council members, his padawan
close at his side.
"You wished to speak with us?"
"Yes," Mace Windu answered. Studying Qui-Gon closely, he asked,
"How are you feeling, Master Jinn?"
The unexpected question caught Qui-Gon off-guard for a moment,
then he answered, "Fine, Master."
"Went to the healers, yesterday you did," Yoda said.
"Yes, I...my stomach was upset. Nothing serious, I can assure
you."
"That is not what they have just told us," Windu added.
"Apparently there were some...abnormalities in their test
results, which they did not understand until today."
Yoda cut to the chase: "Pregnant, you are, Qui-Gon Jinn."
Qui-Gon blinked. He felt Obi-Wan's shock hitting him like a
bolt of Force-lightning, but he suppressed a similar reaction
and responded calmly, "If you will excuse my questioning these
results, I did not think such a thing was...physiologically
possible."
"Neither did the healers. Which is why they want to see you
both for some further tests, to confirm this and determine how
such a thing has happened."
"Yes, of course." Qui-Gon stood there silently for a moment.
"Is there anything else?"
"Not for the moment. We will be monitoring your condition
closely, and with great interest," Windu answered. "May the
Force by with you."
Neither master nor padawan said a word as they left the council
chambers and walked to the lift. As the door whooshed
shut behind them, Obi-Wan whirled to face his master and
exclaimed, "PREGNANT?!"
"So it would seem."
"But how is that possible?"
"That's what I'd like to know."
Obi-Wan paced in front of him and accused, "You're being
infuriatingly calm about this."
"What reason is there to be upset? It is a curious thing,
certainly, but if this is the will of the Force, then I will
accept it."
"We'll see if you're still saying that nine months from now
when it comes time for the delivery," Obi- Wan remarked. "The
tests have to be wrong. A human male can't get pregnant!"
"The Force has been known to allow many seemingly 'impossible'
things to come about, Padawan. Stranger things have happened."
"Name one."
Qui-Gon thought for a moment. "Well, nothing comes to mind
immediately but I'm sure they have."
The lift stopped on the healer's level and the two men stepped
out into the corridor. "Is it our child, do you think?"
Obi-Wan asked.
"Who elses' would it be?"
"Well if the Force put it there, it could be anyone's,
really."
Qui-Gon focused and reached out with the Force, trying to sense
the life he was told was growing inside him. Sure enough, he
felt a gentle response, a small pulse in the Force that was
like an echo of himself...but also of another, one whom he knew
well. "No, it is definitely, somehow, our child,
Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan gave him a curious glance at his announcement but said
nothing more about it. In fact, they had little chance to say
anything at all to each other for the next several hours, as
medtech droids and curious healers swarmed about them, asking
questions, running tests, poking, prodding, and generally
making terrible nuisances of themselves. In the end, the
healers knew little more about Qui-Gon's condition than they
had before and remained utterly baffled. The Jedi were both
glad when they were finally allowed to return to their quarters
and spend some time trying to come to terms with this
unexpected event.
"A baby." Obi-Wan placed his hand over his master's stomach as
they sat together on the sleep couch. His eyes widened after a
moment and he exclaimed, "There really is a baby in
there!"
"Indeed there is, Padawan."
"I can feel him...or her...I can't tell... This is so bizarre.
I never really thought about being a father before."
"And how do you feel about it now?"
"Just...surprised. I suppose I'll get used to the idea." He
looked up at his master and gave him a wide grin. Qui-Gon knew
that particular grin usually meant trouble. "Bloody hell,
you're glowing!" Obi-Wan said with a laugh.
"What?"
"Glowing. I always heard that people who were pregnant
got this 'glow' about them. Never believed it until now." He
reached up to tangle his fingers in his master's hair and
added, "It's terribly sexy, you know."
"Is it."
"Oh yes, very." Obi-Wan shifted so that he was sitting on his
master's lap, hands massaging his shoulders. He leaned in
closer and whispered, "Incredibly sexy" before claiming his
lover's lips for a lingering kiss. Qui-Gon felt his padawan's
love, pouring into him through the kiss, his touch, his
reassurance that as bewildering as this turn of events was, it
would not change anything between them...
"Master?"
Qui-Gon opened his eyes. Disoriented, he found himself lying in
bed, daylight streaming in through the windows. His head hurt,
his mouth was dry, and he felt feverish and achy all over.
"Obi-Wan?"
"Here, Master." Obi-Wan settled on the sleep couch next to his
master, touching his forehead gently and looking down at him
with a worried frown. "No more Anrian Sweet Wine for you. You
had a bad reaction to it last night almost as soon as we left
the reception. Do you remember?"
Dimly, Qui-Gon recalled a dinner reception...something
involving entertaining several visiting diplomats who were
donating a significant endowment to the Jedi Temple...
"Vaguely."
"Yes, well, the healers say you're not the only one who's
knocked for a loop today, thanks to the diplomats' 'gifts'.
Apparently the Anrians forgot to mention their distilled
spirits tend to be suitable only for those with the strongest
constitutions. You still feel hot; this should help." Obi-Wan
offered him a cup of cool mint tea, which he sipped gladly.
"You're to take it easy today, until you're feeling better and
this fever goes away."
"I will. I'm not feeling inclined to go anywhere at the
moment."
"Is something else wrong?"
"Nothing. Just a dream I had while I was asleep. Must have been
from the fever."
"A nightmare?"
"No, hardly. It was just...very unusual."
Obi-Wan slipped under the light blanket and settled in against
Qui-Gon, offering love and healing energy in his embrace.
"Well, since you're not going anywhere, I think I'll stay here
for a while as well, if you don't mind."
"Never," Qui-Gon answered, sighing at the pleasant feeling of
his lover's body close to his own.
A dream...that was all it was. Impossible to be
otherwise.
Still, he had to admit he felt a touch of regret to know that
was all it had been. He loved Obi-Wan more than anything, and
the thought that their love could have produced a child,
against all logic and laws of nature...
Well, it was a pleasant dream to hold onto, even if it could
never really happen.
"Padawan?"
"Yes, Master?"
Qui-Gon brushed his hand through Obi-Wan's hair. "Do you
believe in miracles?"
"Of course." He lifted his head and with a smile said, "Ever
since the day you told me you loved me, I have."
Qui-Gon smiled back at his padawan, and decided that he, too,
believed.
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