Real Life: Take two

by Ewankenobi (PadawanEwan@aol.com)

Archive: MA . . . Any one else just let me know.

Rating: R- LANGUAGE

Pairing: Q/O

Category: A/U, POV

Warnings: None

Spoilers: None

Feedback: Welcomed. Encouraged. Craved.

Summary: You have to read Real Life to see where this is headed.

Disclaimers: Lucas owns Star Wars. I own my laptop.

Notes: This one rambles, a bit. Qui-Gon is a bit clueless. As always, much thanks with whip . . . cream and cherries, for the beta Master.

Journal: Qui-Gon Jinn

Obi-Wan is gone. No, he hasn't left me yet. But He has taken a mission, alone. I must admit it did hurt.

We had a talk last night. It started out pleasantly enough. We reminisced. There was some hand-holding, a soft caress, a ghost of a kiss, very nice surprise (my Obi isn't terribly affectionate). Then, slowly our life together now came up. From that point on it got progressively worse.

He asked me why I have never been as complimentary of him as I have of others. My answer was honest. One name-Xanatos. To which he replied, "Fuck you." ( That's my Obi in a nutshell-face of an angel, body of a god, voice of an aristocrat, a walk that inspires sin and the language of freighter pilot.) He was angry. I tried to explain; I didn't want him to become the arrogant fool my failed-one had. He didn't want to hear any of it. Again, he brought up a sore point with him. Was I ever going to see him as a strong, capable Knight? Then I screwed up, bigtime. When I tried to tell him I did respect him and had pride in his abilities, I called him Padawan.

The Thing he uttered next floored me:

"I hate everything about you, yet I love you. You hate everything about me, yet you love me. Why?"

I had no answer to that. He went on about our very real differences: I live in the here and now, he is mindful of the future. I interpret the code, he follows it.

I've always felt our differences make us perfect, for one another. No-one else challenges and tests me like my Obi. He makes me crazy and keeps me sane.

This was the point in our "talk" when he told me he was taking a mission, alone. He said he just wanted some space.

The oddest part of all this: my current Padawan, Anakin is angry with ME. Why odd? I have never had to deal with the usual "Master-crush" from him. He seems to enjoy Obi-Wan's company a great deal. In the ten years he's been my Padawan, it's only been lately that I've even wondered about any of this. I mean, if he seems a bit out of sorts, he and Obi-Wan go out for dinner. I am happy they get on so well.

I would have to say my biggest concern with any of this . . . my Obi has taken a mission to Bandomeer.

Xanatos could be around there somewhere.

I just want Obi-Wan to come home, safely. To me.

I miss him.

Everything will be fine.

tbc.....