Master Apprentice Archive The Red Band - Part 3: Denial Quick search:

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Category: Angst

Rating: NC-17

Spoilers: JA 8

Series: The Red Band. Best read in order.

Summary: Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon have agreed to wait until Obi is knighted, but they quickly discover "you can't go back..."

Disclaimer: George Lucas is da man. He owns everything. We just play.

Warnings: Explicit m/m sex and discussion of rape.

AGE 22:

Obi-Wan awoke, rubbed his eyes fuzzily and looked around, taking a moment to get his bearings and realize where he was. Not in his room, but somewhere familiar ...

Qui-Gon's room. Qui-Gon's bed.

So, it _hadn't_ been a dream. A lazy, slow grin lit his face, and he sprang to his feet with uncustomary alacrity for such an early hour.

As he expected, his master was already up and dressed, sitting at the table with a steaming cup and a bowl full of fruit and grain, munching as he typed something on his datapad. He looked up when Obi-Wan emerged from the bedroom and smiled, a tad impersonally, Obi-Wan thought, considering what they'd been up to last night.

"Good morning, Padawan." Qui-Gon turned his eyes back to the datapad.

Obi-Wan's grin faded a bit. _I'm standing here naked and that's all I get? We'll soon remedy that!_ He crossed the few feet to Qui-Gon and wrapped himself around the big man's shoulders, bending to place a kiss on his furry cheek. "Good morning, Master," he breathed seductively into Qui-Gon's ear.

Qui-Gon tensed and turned his face away, causing Obi-Wan to withdraw, confused and a little hurt. "You'd best get cleaned up and dressed if we're to be on time for the Council," said Qui-Gon.

The Council. Obi-Wan's stomach clenched. "Yes, Master." He rose and entered the bath, going through his ablutions absently as he tried to quell his anxiety. Despite everything, the Council might decide their relationship was inappropriate, or premature, and censure them, even force them apart. The thought of being separated from his master made Obi-Wan feel almost ill, and he pushed the idea aside. _Serenity_, he reminded himself, and took a few deep breaths to center himself. It would not help their cause if he went before the Council in a near-panicked emotional state. No, he would honor Qui-Gon best by being as serene and unflappable as his master.

As soon as Obi-Wan was out of hearing, Qui-Gon sighed. It had been difficult enough to let his eyes slide over the sight of his Padawan's naked form without lingering, but to turn aside from his touch, his kiss ... and worse, to feel Obi-Wan's confusion and hurt ... Qui-Gon felt as if he'd tried to rip his own heart right out of his chest. Yet what could he do? Even that brief, almost chaste touch of Obi-Wan's lips to his cheek had scalded him, leaving him breathless and partially erect. Force help him the next time he let the young man kiss him, embrace him, caress him, as he knew Obi-Wan must surely want to do. He had said they would wait, but he knew now that he could not, would not be able to, hold off now. If he had to endure Obi-Wan's touch, his taste, the bright presence of his mind in the Force every day, in the intimacy of their shared quarters and during the closeness of their frequent missions, he would surely go mad.

As he saw it, he had only a few options, none of them in the least satisfactory. One, he could do what Adi had suggested last night. He could be both lover and master to Obi-Wan. Perhaps that might be best -- he knew some Jedi had found a way to do so -- but despite his deep longing for it, he could not find a way to reconcile himself to the idea. Their positions were inherently unequal. He required unquestioning obedience -- their lives often depended on it -- and although he encouraged Obi-Wan to voice his opinions, the young man was still his subordinate, with all that implied. Sex between them now could blur the lines, leading to resentment, rebellion, even manipulation. He'd seen it happen. _Force,_ he'd experienced it; his affection for Xanatos had blinded him to the boy's faults. It had taken the heat of his Padawan's saber at his throat to bring him to his senses. No, that option was out.

Two, he could take Obi-Wan as his lover and give up the boy's training to another master. But that would mean, first, abdicating his responsibilities as a Jedi and his vows to Obi-Wan, something he would never do, and second, being separated from Obi-Wan during their respective missions -- almost never seeing each other -- until after Obi-Wan's trials. Plus Qui-Gon could not bear the thought of anyone but himself fighting at Obi-Wan's back, protecting him from harm. No, that option was out as well.

Three, he could simply and firmly reject Obi-Wan as his lover, freeing the young man to find someone else, someone who had less emotional baggage than his old master, someone who could love and cherish him as he deserved, _right now_. He considered this briefly. Although it would devastate him to give up the love and joy he had found with his apprentice, he would be willing to do so if he thought it was best for the young man. Unfortunately, after their actions last night, he feared a rejection now would be the worst sort of betrayal. It could scar Obi-Wan for life. No, things had gone too far for that. If they were to part, it would have to be at Obi-Wan's initiative.

Four, they could wait. And waiting, for Qui-Gon, meant no loving contact of any sort. Even the cuddling and kissing most chaste couples engaged in would be too much of a temptation for them both. It would be difficult, but they were Jedi, skilled in the art of serenity, well practiced in denying their personal desires in the interests of duty and service.

And while they waited, perhaps Obi-Wan would come to his senses and realize he did not have to settle for his old master. Better to hold off and lose him that way, thought Qui-Gon, than to bind him to me and have him realize only too late what a poor bargain he has made.

The night before he had incautiously opened himself to Obi-Wan as he had never, in all his years, allowed with another being, and he had been rewarded with an outpouring of love and devotion that had dazzled his senses and humbled him to his core. To turn his back on that, to see it given to someone else, would surely tear him apart. But he would gladly sacrifice himself rather than suffer the horror of seeing his Padawan come to resent their bond.

Just then Obi-Wan emerged from his room, tugging on his sleeves to adjust them. He crossed the room to his master and looked up, grinning shyly, with all of his love and longing shining in his clear green eyes. Qui-Gon looked away to the window.

Obi-Wan wanted to reach out, take Qui-Gon's face in his palms, and kiss him until he was weak in the knees. His hands rose, tentatively. Nothing in Qui-Gon's stance or manner gave him any encouragement, and he was loathe to incur another rejection so soon. His master was not even meeting his gaze. He let his hands fall. Perhaps now was not the time for teasing.

Instead, he finished plaiting his Padawan braid and very deliberately tied it off with a red band. If nothing else, that red band would remind both of them of Obi-Wan's commitment. While he wore it, his body belonged to Qui-Gon and no other. It gave him a sense of peace and completion to wear it for everyone to see.

Qui-Gon watched from the corner of his eye, then turned away. That damned red band would not let him forget his weakness. Resolutely, Qui-Gon rose and donned his cloak. He had made his decision. It was time.

Both men had managed to school their minds and faces into the expected calm befitting Jedi by the time they reached the anteroom and stood to await their summons. Since the unsatisfying exchange this morning, Qui-Gon had said nothing, had not even met Obi-Wan's eyes. His mind was tightly shielded, but it didn't take the Force to see the stiffness in his stance, the barely contained restlessness.

For his part, Obi-Wan had got over his earlier apprehension and was now simply confused. Despite his master's distrust of the Council, Obi-Wan was usually more than willing to defer to their greater wisdom. He knew his feelings were true, and right. This was the will of the Force. Surely even the Council would not go against them, especially not after last night. So why was Qui-Gon wound up tighter than a hyperdrive coil?

Obi-Wan reached out to take his master's hand. Their palms brushed for a moment, then Qui-Gon pulled away, still not looking at him.

"I promise you," Qui-Gon said softly. "No matter what happens, no matter what the cost to myself, you will be a Jedi Knight."

The resignation in that voice turned Obi-Wan's stomach to ice. "I will always be your Padawan," he whispered.

The door opened and Yoda beckoned them with a wave of his stick. Obi-Wan followed his master one step behind. They both bowed as they came to the center of the circle.

"Master Gallia has briefed us on your situation," said Mace Windu. "We would know more before we make a decision."

Qui-Gon simply nodded. Obi-Wan kept his eyes on the floor.

Yoda's ears tilted as he took in the stoic faces and tight shields of the two Jedi before him. He gazed pointedly at Qui-Gon. "A mess you have made of this, hmm?" he queried.

"Yes, my Master," said Qui-Gon softly.

"Tell us, you will, why you should not be separated from him."

Obi-Wan looked up at that, startled, and bit back a reply. It was not his question to answer.

"If that is the will of the Council, I will abide by it."

This was too much. "No!" Obi-Wan cried, stepping forward.

"However," continued Qui-Gon, as if Obi-Wan had not spoken, "despite my ... regrettable behavior and lack of control, I do not think it is in Obi-Wan's best interests to have a new master at this stage in his training. With your permission, we have agreed to wait until he is knighted to pursue our ... sexual relationship." He looked at Adi, whose brows were threatening to disappear under her headdress.

"Hmm. Unexpected this is," said Yoda.

"And unwise," added Adi, forcefully. "You can't go back, Qui-Gon. Some things are not easily swept under a rock and forgotten."

"Nothing will be forgotten, I assure you." Qui-Gon's eyes met Obi-Wan's for a brief second, long enough to sear the younger man with the heat he saw there. Obi-Wan subsided and stepped back, heart pounding.

"It's hardly fair to the boy," said Ki-Adi-Mundi.

Yoda pressed a gnarled finger to his chin. "Obi-Wan, what say you?"

Obi-Wan tried to ignore the spark of resentment at being called a boy. "It was my idea, Master Yoda."

Mace sat forward. "You wish to remain celibate for the next several years?"

Obi-Wan looked at Qui-Gon and then away. "Of course not, Master Windu. But I will do whatever I must as long as it means we can stay together."

"Suppose we ordered you to separate, have no contact at all, until you are knighted?"

"You have no right," breathed Qui-Gon through clenched teeth.

"Right, we most certainly have, Qui Gon. And duty, yes," said Yoda. "To this Padawan. To the Force. Answer the question you must, Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan swallowed heavily. "I believe the Force has drawn us together, Master Yoda, and I grieve to even think of being apart from my master. But if you order us to separate, I will obey. Your word is my law, and I am a Jedi first."

"Well said, Padawan," whispered Eeth Koth.

"Go then," said Yoda, and waved his stick at them. "Meditate on this matter, we will."

"Have no contact with each other until we give you leave," added Mace. "We will summon you when we've reached a decision. May the Force be with you."

It was a dismissal, and any more words would be disrespectful in the extreme. The two Jedi bowed, and Obi-Wan stepped aside to let his master pass through the door first. Their eyes did not meet.

Adi Gallia's voice checked his progress before he reached the door. "Obi-Wan."

He stopped and turned, dropping a mask of serenity on his features. "Yes, Councilor?"

She waited until the door had closed, sealing Qui-Gon away even from their bond. "I am starting to have my doubts about this. You seem ... disconnected. I sense a great deal of turmoil in your emotions." The other councilors nodded thoughtfully.

Obi-Wan took a deep breath. "Master Gallia, it's true I'm upset. It's ... I've been waiting for five years to ... to be with him. I love him. And now ... to think of having it all taken away again ..." He was surprised to feel tears burning his eyes. He blinked them ruthlessly away and cleared his throat. "And I trust you can understand ... it's frankly a little humiliating to have the Council know the details of ... of my sex life, such as it is." He grinned feebly at that, and Adi smiled gently in return. She doubted she'd have as much poise if put in his position.

"I understand," she said. "Nevertheless, we must be sure there was no abuse. I'd like you to visit soul healer Sag-dho."

He started to object out of reflex, but stopped. It would do no good to argue. And Sag-dho was a compassionate, fair being. He would simply have to be completely open and honest, placing his trust in the healer and the Council and the Force.

"Of course," he murmured, and bowed low. When nothing further was said, he turned and left.

Sag-dho was expecting him. The tall, pale-skinned Master Healer beckoned him inside with a wave of one spindly appendage and then folded his six limbs into a soft chair. He studied Obi-Wan through a pair of wide-set, yellow eyes. Those large, round orbs in the circular head always made Obi-Wan think of a plate of fried whitefowl eggs.

After a moment of silence Obi-Wan said, "I suppose the Council told you why I'm here."

"Oh, yes," said Sag-dho. His soft voice lilted with a light lisp; he always sounded like a shy child. "But I would like to hear the story from you."

Obi-Wan nodded. He felt the waves of acceptance and reassurance the healer was sending him, and relaxed into them, letting his embarrassment fall away into the Force. "Where would you like me to start?"

"Anywhere you like."

After a moment's hesitation, Obi-Wan decided to start at the beginning, his first sexual encounter with a boy named Sedjik when he was on a mission at age fifteen. It had been more than a year before he'd realized he loved Qui-Gon, and even longer before he'd tied the red band onto his braid that meant he'd take no other lovers until he came of age, but in the meantime he'd gained quite a bit of experience with a variety of partners. Above all he wanted Sag-dho to realize he was no blushing virgin. He had known what was happening, had allowed it, encouraged it.

Even though ... even though Qui-Gon had ignored him when he said no.

Sag-dho stopped him. "You said no, yet your master persisted?"

"I guess part of me didn't really want him to stop. Otherwise I would have ... I didn't say it very forcefully. I didn't make myself clear. He misunderstood."

"He could not sense your distress through the bond?"

"He was shielded so tightly ..." Obi-Wan shrugged helplessly.

"This worries me," said Sag-dho.

Obi-Wan clenched his hands. "I'd asked him to have sex with me. I responded to his kisses. I was rock hard, for Force's sake! How was he supposed to know I ... "

"Were you not crying during most of this encounter? That should have been a sign that you were unwilling ..."

"I was confused -- _not_ unwilling!" Obi-Wan stood and paced, running a hand through his hair. "He turned me down, laughed at me. Then he was furious when he saw me with Rissa. Then he was suddenly all over me. Of course I was confused. I'd never seen him behave so erratically before, or have so little control over his emotions ..."

"He was out of control?"

"No! I mean, he was earlier. But not, not when ..."

"Yet you say he was shielded tightly. Isn't it fair to say you could not assess his emotional state at all during intercourse?"

Obi-Wan let out a deep breath. He sat, hard. "No, I couldn't. That's why ... if he'd been open to me, I would have realized it wasn't meant to be a punishment ..."

"You thought your master initiated sex as a punishment?"

Oh, this was sounding worse and worse, but Obi-Wan had sworn to himself to be completely honest. "You make it sound so ... it wasn't like that. I had expected him to beat me for insubordination, and suddenly he was kissing me, and I got confused."

"And afterward?"

"Afterward, I just wanted him to go. I didn't want him to see me ... I thought I might disgrace myself by crying again. I took a shower and then went to Rissa to apologize. I was feeling pretty low." He grinned feebly at Sag-dho, who gave him an approximation of a human smile in return.

"I am told you were contemplating suicide."

Obi-Wan started. "How ... who told you that?"

Sag-dho, shifted his limbs slightly. "Your master sent a thorough report to the Council. I have read it."

Obi-Wan took a deep breath an let it out. "No, I wasn't contemplating suicide. I told my friend that I wanted to die, but that was just ... hyperbole. I was embarrassed, that's all. I couldn't see my path. Then Qui-Gon came looking for me."

"Go on."

"If you've read his report, I don't see why I have to tell you any more."

"I need to hear it colored by your emotional responses."

Obi-Wan sighed. He finished the story: Qui-Gon's startling admission of guilt and love, the incredible lovemaking session that followed, and their decision to wait for further intimacy until Obi-Wan was knighted.

Sag-dho was silent for a moment, making notes on his datapad. Obi-Wan's thoughts began to drift ... Their lovemaking the night before had been so wonderful, a culmination that had far exceeded even his happiest fantasies. And then, this morning, Qui-Gon hadn't even looked at him, hadn't returned his kiss, had pulled away. Hadn't met his eyes ...

But he had. Just that once, but it had been enough. Obi-Wan had seen the heat there. Surely he could not be mistaken ... could he? Was it simply wishful thinking?

Yet Qui-Gon hadn't argued with the Council for them to stay together. He'd seemed perfectly willing to separate, without even a token protest ...

Sag-dho placed a long-fingered hand on his shoulder, startling him out of his chaotic thoughts. "I will write my report after I see Qui-Gon. For now, I want you to resume your normal activities. What's your schedule for today?"

"Uh ... right now I'm supposed to be in the advanced class on Quantum Time-Space Theory and Mechanics, then sparring with some friends. We're ... my Master and I ... we're kind of marking time waiting to see if the renewed fighting on Fharrha is going to require our intervention. We may be sent there in the next few days. That is," he looked up, almost afraid to ask, "if he is still my Master ...?"

Sag-dho patted him. "Never you fear, young one. It takes more than an awkward misunderstanding like this to separate a Master-Padawan pair. You two will need to see me for some counseling, but I know Master Jinn quite well, and I have every confidence you will both get through this just fine."

Obi-Wan sighed with relief, then hopped up. "Is that all?"

"For now. I will send a scheduling request to your comm once I've spoken with your Master."

"Thanks, Healer Sag-dho." He grinned weakly, then turned and made his way back to the training tower.

A few hours later, Obi-Wan found himself once more in front of the Council. Qui-Gon stood at his side, not looking at him.

He wondered what his Master had been doing the last few hours. Not wanting to face his friends yet, Obi-Wan had skipped the rest of his class, only to be caught by Bant in the corridor. She said she'd talked to Rissa, and both of them wanted to know the juicy details. He put her off, then fled to the salle and worked off his frustrations by challenging a group of fellow Padawans to a series of lightsaber duels. A grueling workout had always functioned like a meditation to him, clearing his head.

Hours later, the chirp of a priority-one call on his commlink had brought him out of an almost trance-like state, and he'd run to the Council Chambers as he was, training pants and tunic soaked clear through with sweat. He tried to calm his breathing as Mace began to speak.

"As we feared, the situation on Fharrha has disintegrated. As you probably know, a significant number of the militant Jhuan faction's people disagreed with their leaders' participation in the peace process. Now a splinter group has started making terrorist attacks, first on the military, then, when that didn't get the result they wanted, on the populace. A few days ago, they claimed credit for a bomb which wiped out a school, killing dozens of small children. The result was a riot, and martial law."

"It looks like we're back to where we started," said Qui-Gon.

"Worse," said Mace. "This splinter group has to be found and stopped before the other factions will even come to the table."

Qui-Gon glanced quickly at Obi-Wan, then away. "In view of the Council's strictures from this morning, I think it best if I go alone."

"This is to be more than a treaty negotiation," said Ki-Adi-Mundi. "You'll need help."

"Another Knight, then." said Qui-Gon.

Mace shook his head. "We're spread too thin. There's not another Knight available who can go right away."

Obi-Wan tried to stifle an acid swell of resentment. They were all talking as if he weren't present. Why had they called him here if he was to be ignored?

Yoda cocked an ear at him. "Something to say, have you, Obi-Wan?"

"Master," Obi-Wan said. "I know the situation between us is still ... unsettled. But I have been to Fharrha before. I can help my Master better than any Knight." He paused, realizing how arrogant that statement had sounded. "I mean to say, we are a good team, and I .. that is, if my Master doesn't mind ... I want to ..." He stopped again, frustrated at trying to dance around the issue. Finally he blurted, "Masters, I belong at my Master's side. I don't trust anyone else to protect him." He blushed fiercely and looked down, awaiting a reprimand.

"Go with Qui-Gon, you shall," said Yoda. "The strictures are lifted."

Qui-Gon stirred as if to protest, then settled again into stillness. He was tightly shielded, and Obi-Wan could sense nothing from him, either good or ill. _I don't care,_ he thought. _This is just like Telos, when he wanted to go after Xanatos by himself. If I had not gone, he might never have come back. I knew then I belonged by his side. I still do, whether he realizes it or not._

Obi-Wan stowed their packs on the Republic Cruiser and went forward to sit with his Master. Qui-Gon was waiting for him in the diplomatic salon. Obi-Wan stopped and bowed his head.

"Padawan," Qui-Gon said, and placed a hand on Obi-Wan's shoulder. "Look at me."

Obi-Wan raised his eyes, and Qui-Gon was moved almost to speechlessness by the guileless love and devotion shining there. He cursed his weakness yet again. Obi-Wan was the most precious thing in his life, a beautiful young man with a beautiful soul, one who would someday be a great Jedi. Yet all Qui-Gon seemed to be able to do was to hurt him. Even now, the warmth of his Padawan's flesh through the layers of fabric was enough to stir his pulse. He swallowed and struggled to find his voice.

"Obi-Wan, although the strictures from the Council are lifted, I still believe it would be best if we refrain from any sort of intimacy."

"I understand, Master."

"Good." Qui-Gon nodded, then withdrew his hand and turned to find a seat.

"Master?"

Qui-Gon found a chair and sat. He did not look back. "Yes, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan came to kneel next to him, his head bowed. "Even if we never ... even if you decide you don't want me ... I want you to know, nothing has changed. I would still die for you."

Qui-Gon's heart skipped a beat. He tried for a lighthearted tone as he pulled the crash webbing over his shoulders. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that, Obi-Wan. Now come, get strapped in."

Obi-Wan looked up, his eyes shining. "Would you ... ?" He shook his head, rose to his feet. "No, forget it."

"What?"

Obi-Wan shook his head again, turned to the window. "Never mind."

"Padawan, what is it?"

Obi-Wan turned back to him, folded his hands in his sleeves. "Master, I'm sorry. It's nothing."

"In my experience, whenever someone says, 'It's nothing,' it usually means there's a problem."

Obi-Wan sighed. "It's just ... well, when we said we would wait, I didn't realize ..." He looked down and scuffed his toe on the floor. Qui-Gon would have laughed at the childish picture his Padawan presented, but the anguish he felt leaking from the young man's shields stopped him. Obi-Wan looked up, smiling apologetically. "I was just wishing for one kiss, that's all. I know it's stupid, and I won't bring it up again. I was feeling a little ... in need of reassurance, I guess.  I'm sorry." He sank into a seat opposite Qui-Gon's and reached for the crash webbing.

Qui-Gon watched him, his heart warring with his head. Finally his heart won. He fumbled with the buckles, unfastening the webbing.

Obi-Wan looked up, his eyes wide. "Master?"

Qui-Gon slid to his knees in front of Obi-Wan, insinuating himself between his Padawan's legs. He took Obi-Wan's face in his hands. "Just one," he murmured. Obi-Wan closed his eyes, licked his lips. Qui-Gon's eyes followed the trail of the pink tongue, wanting to follow and devour it. _Easy,- he told himself. He pressed forward, lips barely parted, letting their breaths mingle before pressing closer still. The silken touch sent a surge of lust through him. Obi-Wan moaned very softly, his lips flowering open under Qui-Gon's increasing pressure. Mouths yielded, then pressed in again, the tips of tongues teasing and withdrawing. The kiss went on and on, building like a musical crescendo. Qui-Gon knew he should stop; he was already rock hard, and the needy sounds Obi-Wan was making weren't doing anything for his composure. But it was so good, so good, and if this was the last time then, oh, please, don't let it be over, not yet, not yet. Obi-Wan's hands tangled in his hair, skimming his neck and ears with feathery touches that sent electricity straight to his groin, and his own hands found their way beneath Obi-Wan's tunics to brush hot, bare skin. The slide of his callused palm over pebbled nipples elicited a gasp, and he did it again, and again, until the young man's moans were almost continuous. Obeying some instinctive need, he deepened the kiss, tongue sliding in and out, teasing, tasting. _Force,- but he could never get enough of his Padawan's kisses; he craved them like a drug. He cradled the back of his Padawan's head with one hand, crushed their mouths together desperately, while the other hand plunged down, beneath the layers of cloth, underneath the waistband to grip and stroke the silken steel of his Padawan's shaft.

Obi-Wan's hips surged, lifting his whole body from the chair, and he shouted. Qui-Gon swallowed his cries with more kisses, working his flesh harder, faster. Obi-Wan's hands fumbled at Qui-Gon's leggings, freeing a ponderous, dripping erection. He fisted it roughly, abrading the swollen tip with his thumb on each stroke. Their mouths still locked, tongues dueling in a mimicry of what their bodies wanted, they drove each other to howling completion. Obi-Wan fell over the edge first, his seed spurting into Qui-Gon's hand. With a shout Qui-Gon joined him, spraying Obi-Wan's chest and chin.

In the aftermath, Qui-Gon pressed their sweaty foreheads together, gripping the top of Obi-Wan's seat to stay upright. Obi-Wan's arms lay limply at his sides. Both of them panted as if they'd been running for miles. Qui-Gon marveled as his internal time sense told him only a minute or two had passed. "I've never felt anything like that," he said hoarsely.

"Nor have I," breathed Obi-Wan.

"You bring out the worst in me, Padawan."

Obi-Wan gave him a crooked grin. "I love you, too."

A muffled cough sounded, and they turned their faces to aft, foreheads still touching. The captain stood in the doorway, studying the ceiling. Her face was pink. "Ah, if you'll get strapped in, we're ready to get going."

She turned and headed toward the cockpit. Qui-Gon sighed, stood, and straightened his clothing back into order as best he could. "Now do you see why I insisted on no intimate contact of any kind?"

Obi-Wan cleaned semen off himself with the corner of his robe, grinning smugly. "Well, if a kiss does that much for you, I can certainly see why. I had no idea you were such a wanton, Master."

Qui-Gon gave him a withering look. "I'm not usually. As I said, you bring out the worst in me."

There was no teasing in Qui-Gon's tone, and Obi-Wan realized he meant it. Sudden shame filled him. He bowed his head. "I'm sorry, Master. I won't let it happen again."

"Thank you, Padawan. Let us speak of this no more."

"Yes, Master."

But underneath the shame was another emotion, one that made Obi-Wan feel even more guilty -- elation. _He wants me,_ he thought. _And that gives me power over him.- He wondered if this heady joy was of the Dark Side. Yoda probably had a dire progression for it -- lust leads to seduction, seduction leads to power, power leads to corruption -- but at the moment he felt too sated and happy to care.

_He wants me.-

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and basked in the afterglow. _He wants me.-

END Part 3.