Touch

by Merry Amelie (MerryAmelie@aol.com)

Archive: MA only
Category: Qui/Obi, Romance
Rating: PG
Summary: Obi-Wan learns through observation.
Feedback: Is treasured at MerryAmelie@aol.com
Disclaimer: Mr. Lucas owns everything Star Wars. I'm not making any money.
To Alex, my friend and beta

Master Jinn sat back and enjoyed the ride as Knight Kenobi flew him from the Jedi Temple to the Senate complex. He was supremely content to be by Obi-Wan's side. Habitually, Qui-Gon got the duty pilot for his hops to the Senate, since Obi-Wan was usually busy on missions of his own, but this time Chancellor Valorum had requested both men's presence.

Obi-Wan's piloting skills were such that he could have easily made a career in the military services had he not dedicated his life to the Jedi. A competent pilot himself, Qui-Gon sat back and reflected upon the difference between ability and expertise, while Coruscant blurred by in a strobe of light and sound.

Obi-Wan landed the shuttle with a feather touch, and gestured to Qui-Gon to precede him out of the cockpit. They strode down the corridors of GSB 1 (Galactic Senate Building One), the identichips on their chests activated and beeping the soft pulse of full authorization.

Nodding to the guards outside Valorum's office, the men entered to find the Chancellor expecting them.

"Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, it's good to see you again," Valorum said, gesturing to a tray of non-alcoholic drinks he'd learned to provide the Jedi after more potent concoctions had continually been turned down.

"Likewise, Finis," said Qui-Gon, taking a sili-plast tumbler of blue-green juice.

Obi-Wan merely nodded, eyes watchful, and ignored the tray.

Seated on a plush white sofa, the Chancellor got down to business. While he detailed their next mission, a succession dispute on a Core planet, Valorum made the most of the seating arrangements.

Obi-Wan looked on with apparent dispassion as the Chancellor used his proximity to Qui-Gon to touch him repeatedly on the shoulder, arm, and even knee. The young man knew that they'd been friends as long as he'd been alive, and considered Valorum past his prime, but these factors did not count for much in the face of this cozy familiarity.

Obi-Wan had to work at serene impassivity during the meeting, and went so far as to shield the partner-link which had replaced the Master-Padawan bond he and Qui-Gon had shared for twelve years.

Although Obi-Wan shielded subtly, he could tell by a slight tensing of Qui-Gon's shoulders that it had been noticed. Of course, the Master did not divert attention to ascertain the cause; there would be time for that when they were off duty.

Obi-Wan smiled to himself. Their new link, despite not being a lovers' bond, which he still had hopes for, was more sensitive even than their former connection, gaining power instead of losing it, as they'd both expected.

Obi-Wan sat back and listened to Valorum's mix of instructions, pleasantries, and reminiscences, one seasoned diplomat analyzing another. The Chancellor's artful friendliness was calculated to put them at their ease, and also eased Obi-Wan's unadmitted ache, as the Knight chided himself that Valorum's ability to forge relationships was at the heart of his negotiating prowess.

What Obi-Wan was witnessing was seduction, but a political, not a personal, one. The Chancellor was Qui-Gon's old friend, yes, but he was using that friendship to ensure the Master's cooperation, not to establish a more intimate association. Obi-Wan did note that Valorum's touches were never returned, though Qui-Gon fairly radiated an air of camaraderie.

The Knight watched the touches amidst the talk impassively, thinking that his private reactions reflected his own desires and motivations more than the tableau played out before him. When they returned to the Temple, Obi-Wan would have to meditate again on his love for Qui-Gon, which had been building with every year of their partnership.

The part of his mind ever on duty responded to his infrequent inclusion in the conversation with an appropriate comment or question; the rest got a head start on his ruminations.

Qui-Gon noticed his preoccupation, of course, but since Obi-Wan had acquitted himself well with Valorum, decided not to call him on it.

On the trip home, the contained energy of piloting and the pleasant relaxation of being flown did not hold quite the same enjoyment for them as before. Both men knew they had matters to discuss in the near future.

Before they parted to complete the day's work, Qui-Gon invited Obi-Wan to his quarters for latemeal, as he'd been planning to anyway. Obi-Wan's unexpected remoteness during their talk with the Chancellor merely gave the Master an additional reason for the invitation.

Obi-Wan had not gotten a chance to meditate before the meal at 8th hour with his former Master. Teaching two courses on DiploEt and grading the resultant papers took care of that.

Obi-Wan was still a bit flustered by his intense reaction to what even he had to admit was an innocuous situation. What would he do if Qui-Gon were really being seduced? Worse yet, what would he do if the Master were to respond?

An involuntary shiver coursed through Obi-Wan as he strode down the hall to Qui-Gon's quarters. He had barely accepted the constant need to leash his desires indefinitely; how could he keep to his resolve if presented with a real rival?

And Qui-Gon, all unknowing, might expect Obi-Wan to be happy for him. His altruistic love for the man, at least as intense as his more selfish wants, would have to grow stronger still. Serenity seemed destined ever to elude him.

Obi-Wan arrived at his former Master's door precisely on time. Qui-Gon welcomed him in warmly, and they sat down to a lovely array of commissary food which Qui-Gon had ordered that afternoon.

Qui-Gon was content to let the evening unfold without any direct questioning, in the hope that Obi-Wan might share his thoughts with him spontaneously, as he was wont to do in their downtime.

By the time they moved to the couch for some spiced cha, their usual informality had reasserted itself. Obi-Wan nested in the corner with his legs neatly tucked under him, while Qui-Gon had put his leather hair tie on an armrest and spread out over the rest of the sofa.

The comfort of his old rooms and the cha warming him inside combined to relax Obi-Wan enough to mention the day's events. "I'm sorry for my distraction with the Chancellor today, Qui-Gon. I should have been more focused on our new assignment."

Qui-Gon smiled at him lazily. "No apologies, Obi-Wan. Two old men nattering on doesn't exactly make for scintillating conversation." Amused apology colored his tone.

Obi-Wan sat up at this. "It's not that at all, Qui-Gon. I wasn't bored." He forced himself to continue, seeing the puzzlement in the Master's eyes. "He touched you." The words seemed to fill the common room, his subsequent stillness and Qui-Gon's conferring significance to them beyond that of a simple comment.

If anything, the words increased Qui-Gon's bemusement. Finis had been touching him during their conversations for the past few decades. The Master could scarcely think of anything more innocuous than these brotherly pats.

Obi-Wan saw his former Master's confusion, and could hardly blame him. He hadn't really worked this through himself yet, and here he was bothering Qui-Gon with it, as if he were still a Padawan in need of guidance. "In the Temple, most of us do not touch except during physical training. On missions, we do whatever the cultural norms demand, but usually our status as negotiators sets us apart and that protects us from casual contact. I never see you like you were with him." Obi-Wan stopped abruptly, hearing the jealousy in his own voice.

Qui-Gon heard it too and was pleased, though he sensed the Knight's dismay. His love for Obi-Wan would always express itself in exactly the way the young man needed it. "Would you like me to be that way with you?"

Obi-Wan's answer burst out reflexively. "No! You didn't even touch him back."

Qui-Gon's eye crinkles made their first appearance of the evening. "That's because I save my touches for you."

And Obi-Wan saw them. The shoulder squeezes, the brush of fingers where his braid had met his cheek, the big hand gliding over his lengthening hair. But he had never reciprocated, just as Qui-Gon did not with Valorum.

How could Qui-Gon realize Obi-Wan's feelings for him without any clues? The Knight shielded this part of himself from the link, he never touched Qui-Gon in return, he treated him as a respected colleague. There was nothing in all of that to encourage Qui-Gon to chance greater intimacy.

So far, the Master had courted the limit of what he considered innocent affection, and all he had gotten was Obi-Wan's sense of quiet gratitude over the bond. Now it was time to touch Qui-Gon, and let him feel in full what his hands had done to Obi-Wan over the years, everything from soothing to stimulating.

Moving closer on his knees, Obi-Wan ran his fingers through the fall of Qui-Gon's hair, watching the Master's eyes widen at the caress. For all the times Qui-Gon had patted his hair, Obi-Wan hadn't touched his except when asked for assistance.

"And I've been saving my touches for you. But no longer, Qui-Gon." Hands still wrapped in Qui-Gon's hair, Obi-Wan pulled him forward for their first kiss: tender, strong, luscious.

Qui-Gon's hands found the back of his neck, caressing the hair and hot skin beneath. "I love you, Obi-Wan," the words a whisper of pleasure against his lips.

"I love you, Qui-Gon." Obi-Wan pulled him yet closer for a deeper kiss, and felt Qui-Gon's fingers tighten on his back.

They kissed and stroked each other on the couch, Qui-Gon's touches revealed for what they'd been since Obi-Wan's Knighthood: an invitation for more. And the young Knight took it. After all, Obi-Wan had a lot of touches to make up for, and was looking forward to each one.

End.