Padawan Kenobi woke up gay

by Raina

Rating: PG

Category: Humour/Parody

Summary: The "Woke up gay" syndrome has reached the Jedi Temple, first part in a series.

Disclaimer: Ok, so I don't own them, big news. I don't own anything, really so suing me would be especially pointless, since I don't make any money of anything. I don't own anything from Moulin Rouge either, just in case you were wondering. Which I think you are not.

Spoilers: None that I'm aware of.

Feedback: Love it, crave it, write for it.

Author's Note: Hi! I've never posted here before, I just thought maybe you'd like this bit of nutsy stuff.

One morning, 20-year old Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi woke up gay.

He jumped out of bed, greeting the beautiful day with a happy sigh. He got dressed, bounced into the living room and greeted his Master cheerfully, "Good morning, dear Master, isn't this just the most wonderful day you've ever seen? I'm so happy, I could sing and dance."

He walked out, followed by a consternated Qui-Gon, who scratched his head and asked himself if his Padawan had maybe taken to Correlian Death Sticks this morning.

Obi-Wan meanwhile, danced along the corridor, greeting every Jedi in sight with a delighted wave, leaving the Masters looking after him with less than enlightened expressions.

He reached the cafeteria, and decided he had to share his happiness with the entire room, so he grabbed a serving trolley, stood on it and Force-rolled it into the cafeteria. He rolled in and sang, loudly, "The Force is alive with the sound of Jedi, with mantras they have said for a long long time…"

He was met with absolute silence. The whole temple stared at him open- mouthed and totally consternated. Bant dropped her spoon and her jaw in the same instant.

Suddenly the silence was broken by Mace Windu, striding towards Obi- Wan. "What the Sith do you think you're doing, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan looked at him with a smouldering glance, "Master Windu, did anyone ever tell you what a handsome man you are? I mean, your shoulders, your stride, and your lightsaber…." Obi-Wan began to sing, "Just one night, give me just one night. In the name of the Force, one night in the name of the Force.."

Mace looked at the Padawan with an expression that would freeze lava, "Padawan, are you on drugs? Were you brainwashed? What is the matter with you?"

Obi-Wan shrugged, "I just woke up gay!" With that he turned around to meet his fuming Master, "Oh, Master, you look ravishing this morning, this brown robe is SO you! The colour is so great for your eyes!"

He whipped out sunglasses and started to wiggle his hips suggestively in front of Qui-Gon, singing, "Yeah, you can tell by the way I use my saber that I'm a Jedi man, no time to talk." He danced around Qui-Gon, swinging his hips and arms, "Whether you're a Jedi or whether you're a Master, you're usin' the Force, usin' the Force Ah, ha, ha, ha, usin' the Force, usin' the Force Ah, ha, ha, ha, usin' the Force…"

The mind healers were dragging him away even as he held the last note and the last thing everybody heard as the doors closed on Obi-Wan was, "You know, Healer, white is totally your colour.."