Summary: Qui-Gon finds himself drawn to a suffering little boy.
Feedback: Please? This is by far the most unusual story I've
attempted, and it just sorta came to me at a very, very late
hour. So, please let me know if it was worth losing those hours
of sleep.
Notes: First, yep this is songfic in a minor way. This story
was inspired by the first few parts of "You'll Be In My Heart"
by Phil Collins. And I know very little of how the Jedi are
trained when they are young, but it's only a minor issue (I
think) in this. Lastly, I debated posting this to the m_a, as
it's not slash - the boy is 5 - but after a minor amount of
prodding (ha! yelling was more like it *g*) by Holly I decided
to go for it because it *does* deal with a kind of pre-m-a
situation.
Disclaimer: Um, I won them playing sabbacc? Didn't think so.
Dang it. Okay, great George, they are yours. "You'll Be In My
Heart" written by Phil Collins and distributed by Disney.
Mee-sa no own the Mouse, either. Mee-sa maka no monies.
Double thanks to holly *g* both for agreeing to beta read my
songfic - gushing and yelling in all the right places :-) and
forwarding this to y'all. many, many chocolate covered
obi-wan's to you!
Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn was walking through the Jedi Academy,
near the area where the newest and youngest Jedi trainees
lived. It was late in the artificial sleep cycle of the
building, and the corridors were empty and silent.
As he walked, he was focused intently on an upcoming mission
that he was to embark on early that morning. However, his
concentration was broken when he heard a small noise.
Although the sound was barely audible, it tore him from his
thoughts in a way he couldn't explain. For a moment, he reached
out through the Force, searching for the source of the
disturbance.
Qui-Gon blinked slowly. He was sure he must be mistaken. Having
traced the sound, he discovered it to be too far away for him
to possibly have heard, especially considering how focused he
had been.
However, before he could dwell on the matter, he heard the
noise again. A choked sob reached out to touch the corner of
his mind.
Walking without thought, Qui-Gon followed the sound to its
source, only to come face to face with a closed maintenance
room door. He pushed the door open, curious about who or what
had led him there. He could see very little in the dark room.
What little light filtered in from the hallway merely succeeded
in casting odd shadows on the walls.
Still, his senses assured him that what he sought was indeed
there. When he stepped into the room and closed the door behind
him, he felt as much as heard the occupant's attempt to remain
silent and hidden.
"Hello?" Qui-Gon called out quietly.
Qui-Gon didn't want to startle the small boy he could just
barely see. The child was pressed tightly into the far corner.
He had his arms wrapped around his knees, which were pulled up
to his chest. The boy, Qui-Gon realized, could be no older than
five years old.
Another small whimper, similar to that which first attracted
his attention tore from the boy. Again, Qui-Gon wondered how he
might possibly have heard the faint noise. Shaking his head, he
walked over and kneeled in front of the sniffling boy.
//Come stop your crying
It will be alright
Just take my hand
Hold it tight//
Qui-Gon could easily feel his unease and was careful to
surround the child with peace through the Force. When he felt
the boy calm somewhat, he placed a hand on his chin, raising
his face to view.
His stoic heart softened at the sight of shining tears framing
the large green eyes. He blinked, surprised both by the
strength of the Force within in the boy and the instant
connection he felt to him. Almost of its own volition, his
thumb brushed across the small cheek, wiping away past tears.
"What is wrong, little one?" he asked in a low, soothing voice.
The youth hiccuped, taking a struggling breath as he fought the
tears. He looked up into Qui-Gon's eyes, still scared, and
tried to press himself further into the corner.
Qui-Gon lowered his hands, and shifted his legs beneath him so
that he sat cross-legged in front of the child. He rested his
hands on his knees. "Okay," he said softly, "what if you tell
me your name?"
Unsure eyes looked up again at Qui-Gon, eyelashes blinking
fast. "Obi-Wan," the boy said quickly, as much a rush of air as
a word.
"Obi-Wan," the Jedi Master repeated. Qui-Gon was unsure how to
proceed, as he had rarely dealt with the youngest children.
However, he also felt he couldn't leave the child to seek a
teacher.
"Why do you hide, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked gently, no
recrimination in his voice.
Obi-Wan's shoulders shook, and Qui-Gon could see that he was
worried he would be in trouble for sneaking off. Eventually,
the child licked his lips nervously, replying in a small voice,
"I miss my mother and brother."
Obi-Wan sniffed softly, and lowered his gaze to stare at the
floor. Qui-Gon knew that some students were able to remember
their families, and found himself silently wondering about the
circumstances of this one's acceptance into the Academy.
He also knew they watched the young students very closely, so
as to avoid one of them stumbling into an area they weren't
allowed or safe, and was curious how this one had managed to
slip away.
"How is it that you came here tonight, Obi-Wan?"
The boy shrugged. "I just did. I thought maybe no one would
mind."
Qui-Gon smiled faintly, and touched a shaking shoulder. "Your
teachers wouldn't want you to be in pain, Obi-Wan." He
continued to project soothing emotions toward the boy, adding
quietly, "Especially not alone."
"But no one else feels like me," Obi-Wan tried to explain, the
strong words bursting forth suddenly. He had looked up to meet
Qui-Gon's gaze as he spoke. Chewing on his lower lip, he waited
a moment before again lowering his eyes and dropping his voice
to add, "We're not supposed to be afraid or sad. Master said
so."
Qui-Gon's heart softened even more at seeing the small face
speak of more grown up responsibilities. Trying to ease the
boy's mind, Qui-Gon asked, "Would you like to tell me about
your family?"
Green eyes again filled with tears, and looked to Qui-Gon. The
sight caused the Jedi to worry he had only upset the child
further. "No one ever asked me that," Obi-Wan said eventually
in a shaky whisper. The boy's eyes reflected his wonder that
someone might ask, and Qui-Gon found himself overwhelmed by the
feeling.
Qui-Gon held out an arm. "Come, young Obi-Wan, you're freezing
sitting there in only your night clothes."
//I will protect you
From all around you
I will be here
Don't you cry//
Obi-Wan looked at the offered hand for a moment, but soon found
himself snugged on Qui-Gon's lap. The Jedi's cloak was wrapped
around his shivering shoulders.
Qui-Gon brushed the sandy hair, not yet cut, away from
Obi-Wan's face. "What do you remember that makes you so sad,
little one?"
The young boy closed his eyes, pressing himself against
Qui-Gon's warmth. The Jedi Master was shocked by the images the
boy projected toward him. A city in flames, people fleeing the
destruction in every direction, but being cut down.
"There was an attack," the boy said a moment later, his eyes
still closed.
It was rare for any Jedi pupil to remember much of their life
before, much less in such detail that Qui-Gon found himself
witnessing. To be able to project the memories was practically
unheard of at any age.
Instead of pushing, Qui-Gon waited until the shaking boy was
ready to go on, merely holding him close as another cry filled
his throat. He could easily sense the trembling emotion within
Obi-Wan, and wondered how no one else had managed to see what
lay within him.
He continued to hold the boy tightly, rocking back and forth
ever so slightly as the tears streamed down the flushed cheeks.
Qui-Gon could sense the absolute truth in the memories as the
child was again able to speak. "Strange aliens attacked our
city. My mom tried to hide us."
Qui-Gon could feel Obi-Wan's lower lip trembling, and a sob
ripped through the boy's chest as the memories continued to
flood from him. He pressed his face into Qui-Gon's tunic, his
eyes closed tightly.
"They found her and Corin, but they didn't find me." Remaining
silent, Qui-Gon wondered if the child had hidden himself in the
Force unknowingly.
His patience and silence were rewarded when Obi-Wan sniffed and
swallowed audibly. "I hid, and then the others came. They
brought me here."
Qui-Gon felt his own emotions stir at the pain in Obi-Wan's
voice. "How long ago was that?" he asked, managing to mask his
own emotion.
Following a loud sniffle, it was a very small voice that
replied. "A year."
The Jedi held onto the boy firmly, and closed his eyes. He
couldn't imagine the raw talent required to mask such pain from
the other Masters. The child had taken his pain and memories to
be weaknesses and buried them deeply, never having the chance
to accept the loss.
He was broken from his thoughts when the child's voice,
ever-small and laced with breaths gasped around tears, asked,
"Why did they find them and not me?"
//For one so small
You seem so strong
My arms will hold you
Keep you safe and warm.//
Qui-Gon shook his head. He could easily tell the boy that it
was simply meant to be. Yet he knew there was no answer to the
question, not that might balm the boy's wounded spirit. Obi-Wan
felt guilty simply for surviving. Again, Qui-Gon was awed by
his inner strength.
Instead of speaking, he surrounded the tiny boy with a blanket
of caring, and something akin to love. None since his failed
apprentice had managed to move so deeply inside his heart.
Certainly none so quickly.
Sometime later, Qui-Gon felt the shuddering tears dissipate
into soft hiccups, and looked down to find him asleep in his
arms. He marveled at the sight of innocence on the boy's
features, as if simply speaking of the horrible events eased
the memory.
For a time, he was content to simply watch as the boy slept in
his arms. Qui-Gon was unable to explain the bond he felt with
the young student, or how he had found him in the first place.
Eventually, he rearranged Obi-Wan in his arms, and stood
carefully. Qui-Gon left the dark room and carried Obi-Wan back
toward the sleeping rooms. He was impressed by Obi-Wan's
ability to escape the watchful eyes of the teachers.
Something inside told him that he would one day grow into a
mischievous student. The kind that was a challenge, while still
the greatest delight to train.
He placed Obi-Wan in his bunk, touching his forehead softly,
trying to give what comfort he could. He then tucked the covers
in around him. With a final look at the sleeping boy, he turned
and left the room.
Qui-Gon still had a mission to ready for, his transport leaving
within a matter of hours. However, he made a promise to himself
to speak to the teachers regarding this rather remarkable
student.
//This bond between us cannot be broken
I will be here
Don't you cry.//
End
anyone make it this far? :-) if so, let me know --
razrbkr@juno.com
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