Getting It Right

by ealintara

Title: Getting It Right
Author: ealintara (disturbedenuff@yahoo.com)
Archive: master_apprentice, lj, ff.net only
Category: Qui/Obi, Humor
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: hiccups may ensue
Spoilers: none
Summary: Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan. A lot of grunting. And what, exactly, is that slurping noise? A little mentoring session between our favorite Master and Padawan.
Feedback: yes, please. Just keep in mind I chuck flames in the toilet. Be constructive, not irrational.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. I just borrow them and have my way with them.

"Two hands, young Padawan. You'll never get it centered with only one."

~Squiiiiish~

"This is so slick, it will be a miracle if I can keep hold."

"Focus, Obi-Wan! You're veering left."

"Argh! Then why don't you do it for me?"

"I can't reach it from here."

"Quiet then!"

~Slosh, slosh, slosh, squish~

"That's not enough pressure. Lean into it!"

~Grunt~

"I am, Qui-Gon! I am!"

~Slurp~

"Ah! See now... that wasn't so difficult."

"That's easy to say when you're usually the one in this position. My legs aren't use to being this spread apart."

"You will get use to it."

"I should hope so."

...

"No, no... don't wipe your hand off before inserting your thumb, it'll stick."

"Now you tell me."

~Slosh~

"I don't exactly have a good view from here, I advise when I can."

"Then how's this?"

"Deeper."

~Mmm~

"Now?"

~Ahh~

"A little more."

"It's in all the way!"

"Oh, is it? Then I suppose that will have to do."

"Oh, wait, I think it's beginning to stick... I'll just pull it out and wet it a bit."

"You learn quick."

"At times. Ok, I'm ready to go back in."

"Good, good... Now start pushing against the side."

"I'm not pushing too hard am I?"

"No, no... that's fine. Very good, even."

"This is better than I expected."

"You doubted me?"

~Grin~

"Never."

"Ah... ah... stop now. Replace your thumb with your fingers."

"All of them?"

"Did I say only one?"

"No, but..."

"Them all, Obi-Wan, it can take it."

"If you're sure..."

"Am I not the one with the experience here?"

"All four it is then."

"Come now, get them all in there!"

"They are, can't you tell?"

"It didn't seem like it at first."

"I'm inexperienced, Master, not timid."

"That remains to be seen... have you plans to become more aggressive as we go on?"

~Grin~

"Perhaps."

~Chuckle~

"Is your other hand still moist?"

"Dripping."

"Good, place it on this side."

"Here?"

"Yes, that's good. Now keep your hand cupped, you want caress the curve, feel it's soft, smooth texture."

"I feel it."

"Is it what you expected?"

~Sigh~

"Yes."

"Now slowly push against the inside with your fingers, feel it give under your fingertips as you stroke upwards."

"Like this?"

~Ahh~

"A little harder, Padawan."

"I don't want to be too hard."

"You aren't. Now harder!"

~Groan~

~Grunt~

"Good, very good!"

~Grin~

"Would you call me a natural, Master?"

~Chuckle~

"Not quite. You're forgetting to cup your other hand... No, no! Get it against there! Caress Padawan, caress!"

"I am! Do I have to smack it so you can tell?"

~Grin~

"Do you really think that necessary?"

~Slurp~
~Smack~

"I suppose you did!"

"You asked if I'd be more aggressive."

"Indeed, I think you felt an imprint."

...

"Focus, Obi-Wan! Don't get lost in the sensations. Be mindful of your movements!"

~Grunt~

"I am! How could I miss them?"

"By looking else where!"

"I'm looking straight at it! Just it, in all its wet glory!"

~Chuckle~

"Oh, are you now?"

~Slurp~
~Slurp~
~Groan~

"Let me help."

"No, Master... I'm setting my own pace. Just stay put."

"And what if I want to move a bit? Find a better angle?"

"No! I like you right there."

~Chuckle~

"Should we do this more often?"

~Grin~

"I'm considering it."

...

"Is it hard enough?"

"Here, let me feel."

"So?"

~Hmm~

"I think it will do."

"Good, I want to get it in there. I'm getting so hot I can barely stand it."

~Grin~

"In a rush, Padawan?"

"Didn't you say every last drop of moisture would have to come out of it before we're done?"

"That I did."

"Well, I don't see that being a quick task."

"Then let's get started. Go on and ease it in."

~Groan~
~Grunt~

"It's a tight fit!"

"Does that present a problem?"

"Not really, no."

"Good, then let's move before we sweat ourselves to death."

...

"What do you think Master Yoda will say when he gets a hold of it?"

"Well, Obi-Wan, I think he'll like it very much."

"Good, I'd hate to think I spend all that time with you only to disappoint him."

~Laughter~

"Relax, Padawan. He'll like the terra cotta bowl."

"It's a cup!"