Archive: master_apprentice, and anyone else that wants it, just
ask.
Category: humour/parody, AU (sort of)
Rating: PG
Summary: If Obi-Wan had been a bit more talkative on Hoth...
Circa ESB
Disclaimer: GL owns Star Wars and part of my immortal soul. The
rest of me is owned by four cats. Sue them, sue them!
Acknowledgements: to the people who told me that this was
actually amusing, and I should post: my illustrious Master
Eliz-mar Von, Emrin, and Delwyn Adara. I love you guys.
Feedback: Yes please. So I know if I'm amusing or just raving
looney. Possibly both.
Warnings: scroll down to the very end of the document if you'd
like to see. Otherwise, go right on to the story.
Luke was dying. On this chunk of icy rock half a galaxy away
from Tatooine, he was dying.
Maybe this Rebellion wasn't really all it was cracked up to be.
Right as he was mentally composing a really nasty lettre of
resignation to Mon Mothma, he heard a voice speak his name.
"Luke?"
"Ben??" He looked up to see a blue glittery thing swirling in
front of him. "Help me..." Luke cried hoarsely.
"You will go to the Dagobah system. There you will learn from
Yoda, the Jedi Master who instructed me." The blue shiny thing
solidified (if you could use such a term) in front of him,
resolving into the shape of Ben Kenobi.
"But Ben..."
"Well, alright, he's actually my grandMaster. My master was
named Qui-Gon Jinn." Ben looked off into the distance,
reminiscing. "What a hunk... he was over six feet tall, long
mane of dark hair with silver running through it..." Obi-Wan
sighed wistfully.
"Ben..."
"And that deep voice... and those HANDS...."
"Ben!"
"...he was a towering sequoia of sex, with eyes like deep blue
pools you could lose yourself in..."
"...Ben..."
"Hm?" Ben finally looked back down at his former student. "Oh,
right, Yoda. You'll go train with him... Luke? Luke!"
"Poodoo," he sighed as he looked down at Luke's rapidly cooling
body, kicking an incorporial foot through it. "Oh well. At
least there's still Leia."
-the end-
(thank goodness)
Warnings: Character death. Not of Obi or Qui.
Wow, I wrote a humour story with character death. I'm rather
proud of myself.
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