Control and How to Lose It (I think it involves having a
certain handsome Padawan suck on your toes)
Series/Sequel: Sequel to Acceptance 3/?
Category: Still pretty much PWP
Pairing: Q/O
Rating: NC 17
Feedback: Ummmm. yes, please.
Disclaimer: George, George, George. I'm only doing what you
lacked the guts to do. And I'm doing it for free. Consider it a
favor and forgo the lawyers. I won't hurt Q & O, but Yoda,
guaruntee his safety I cannot.
Summary: Obi Wan's been away on an apprentice field trip.
(Yeah, I know it's lame. But it's a great excuse for hot sex.)
This is their reunion.
Qui Gon stood on the roof, looking out at Coruscant. He would
have preferred the stars, but the city lights made that
impossible. For the first time since accepting Obi Wan as his
apprentice, the two were separated. Qui Gon was finding that
the younger man's absence interfered with his concentration and
drained his energy. He missed him desperately. Without Obi
Wan's familiar presence in his mind, Qui Gon felt empty,
bereft.
Miss him you do."
Qui Gon acknowledged his new companion without turning around.
"Good evening, Master Yoda."
Yoda walked to the edge of the roof then levitated himself
onto the wall which ran along it. Gazing out at the city, he
observed, "Difficult it is for Master and Apprentice to be
parted. Especially difficult for you it is, hmmm."
Qui Gon felt no need to reply. The other Master knew the truth
of his own words.
"If this hard for you, how must it be for him?"
"Obi Wan is strong." Qui Gon replied, not liking the direction
in which he knew the conversation was going.
"Yes, but strong enough to survive without you, he may not
be." Yoda turned and looked at Qui Gon. "Jeopardize his
training you have. Clouded his future has become."
Qui Gon shook his head. "You worry too much about the future.
It is the present which shapes the future not the other way
around. Focus upon this moment and the future will take care of
itself." He was quite possibly the only living Jedi who had
ever spoken to Yoda in such a fashion. The others revered him.
Revered him too much in Qui Gon's opinion. Yoda was wise, but
he was not omniscient.
"Ignore the warnings of the force you do, then." This was an
old argument between them, and Yoda dutifully spoke his lines.
"No. I do not ignore them. I choose to focus on the feelings
and intuitions I experience in the present. I do not choose to
let myself be haunted by shadows of what may be."
"Focusing on the moment were you? Hmmm. When took Obi Wan to
your bed, you did?"
Startled by the bluntness of his language, Qui Gon looked down
at Yoda. "Do you really think so little of my judgment, Master
Yoda? Do you believe I would knowingly harm Obi Wan, or place
my desires before his well being?"
"Knowingly or not, endanger him you have."
"I disagree. My death will be hard for him, but he will
survive it." Qui Gon gave his former master a hard look. "When
that time comes he will need to draw upon all he has learned."
His voice one of calm certainty, he continued, "Including what
he learned in my arms." Not waiting for a response, he added,
"Would it have been better to leave the feelings between us
unacknowledged and unacted upon, leaving him to doubt both
himself and me?"
Yoda shook his head. "Hope you are right I do. But fear what
may become of him I do."
"Set your fear aside Master. Fear leads to anger; anger leads
to hate; and hate leads to suffering."
Yoda glared at him. "Very amusing, Master Qui Gon. Your
apprentice's impertinence I sense."
Qui Gon grinned, "He has been a good influence."
"Hmmmph." Yoda lowered himself back to the roof and walked
toward the door. As he reached it. Qui Gon spoke, "Master, take
care of him. Help him when I cannot."
Yoda looked back at the tall Jedi. This admission of his own
fear had cost him. "I will, Qui Gon, I will." With that he left
Qui Gon to his loneliness.
Obi Wan was antsy. There was no other word for it. He was
unable to focus on the conversation around him. His entire
being was tensed in anticipation of the moment when they would
come out of hyperspace and he would once again feel his
master's presence in his mind. He longed for Qui Gon's
presence, and his flesh.
The separation of the last few days had been more difficult
than he had anticipated. In addition to the absence of his
master, Obi Wan had had to cope with the unwanted advances of
his peers. His former bedmates wondered at his behavior of the
last few weeks. While on Coruscant he had been able to find
excuses, but that had been much harder to do when it was just
six of them on Camaasi. Two of the group were former lovers and
both, individually, had sought to resume their previous
relationship with Obi Wan. After both were rebuffed, along with
another of their group, speculation had ensued about his
unexpected celibacy. His fellow apprentices had reached the
obvious conclusion, that someone had captured Obi Wan's heart.
It had not taken them long to deduce who that someone was. Obi
Wan had chosen not to respond to their teasing speculation. He
would not lie. Nor would he openly admit his relationship with
his master. For Obi Wan feared exposure, feared what the
Council would do should they learn of it. He did not want to be
parted from Qui Gon and that seemed to him a very real
possibility, should the Council find out. Qui Gon did not share
his fear, but his own natural reserve had dovetailed with Obi
Wan's fear of discovery. Without a word ever passing between
them on the subject, they had agreed to be discreet. Obi Wan
could only hope that upon their return to Coruscant his peers
would find something, someone new to gossip about.
Checking his time sense, Obi Wan rejoiced to discover that in
only three minutes they would be out of hyperspace. Three
minutes and Qui Gon's presence would once again fill his mind,
completing him. Three minutes. He panicked, remembering the
surprise he had purchased for his master. It wouldn't be much
of a surprise if he did not get some shields around his
knowledge of it. Hastily, he separated his thoughts on the
subject from the rest of his mind and put a shield around them.
Qui Gon could easily break the shield, but he would not. He had
always respected any desire on his Padawan's part to shield a
part of his mind. Privacy was even more important, now that
there were so few barriers between them. No one should have to
share all of his thoughts, all of the time.
Joy flowed through Obi Wan. Delight danced along every nerve
in his body, in every corner of his mind. They had come out of
hyperspace. He was home. He was with Qui Gon.
Welcome home, my Padawan Obi Wan fought the urge to
laugh aloud.
Master, he acknowledged Qui Gon. Then conversation
ended as they explored each other's mind, drinking in the
presence that had been so sorely missed.
After many minutes, Qui Gon spoke again. I have a surprise
for you.
Really, Obi Wan asked with delighted anticipation.
Yes, Obi Wan could sense his master's amusement. I
didn't cook.
Obi Wan laughed aloud. The others turned to look at him,
puzzled. His laughter quickly ceased. "Sorry" he apologized,
embarrassed. "Master Qui Gon said something amusing."
That just caused them to stare harder. "You've spoken with him
already?" The young woman to his right asked.
"Yes," Obi Wan replied, sheepishly. The speculation would
certainly not end now. Damn. "Master Qui Gon had something he
needed to tell me. It was urgent."
"And funny," the other apprentice observed dryly.
Obi Wan decided it would be best not to attempt further
explanation.
At last their ship landed. Grabbing the knapsack which held
his few belongings, and Qui Gon's surprise, he headed for the
door . 'I hope he likes it.' Obi Wan thought as he stepped onto
the ramp. His breath caught in his chest. Qui Gon was there
waiting for him. His master had not mentioned meeting the
transport. It took all of his control to keep from running down
the ramp and into his master's arms. Instead Obi Wan allowed
himself a slight increase in pace, and in moments he was
standing before his master, gazing up into those blue eyes.
The two men looked at each other. Oblivious to what was
occurring around them, they were utterly unaware of the
attention their meeting was drawing. Obi Wan's travel
companions stared at the two men. The air about them was filled
with the force, which was flowing between and around them in a
manner which was palpable to the other Jedi.
After several minutes of simply looking at his Padawan,
savoring his presence. Qui Gon reiterated his earlier greeting,
"Welcome home, Obi Wan."
Obi Wan smiled at his master, his eyes not leaving that
beloved face. "Thank you, Master. I am happy to be home."
Turning the two men began the walk back to Qui Gon's quarters.
"How was the trip?"
"Educational, " was the brief reply.
"Good, " Qui Gon chuckled softly, draping an arm around his
apprentice's shoulders.
The moment the door closed behind them, Qui Gon had Obi Wan in
his arms, kissing him with a passion that bordered on
desperation. All of the control he had shown during the walk to
his quarters was gone.
"Qui Gon," Obi Wan moaned, pulling the other man closer,
seeking to find a way to crawl inside him.
In response Qui Gon tightened his arms around Obi Wan, I
missed you. I missed you desperately.
I love you, Qui Gon. I love you.
Qui Gon growled low in his throat, raining passionate bites
and kisses on the younger man's face and neck.
Lifting Obi Wan in his arms he headed toward the bed chamber.
Within moments they were both naked. Hands and mouths moved
unceasingly. Without warning, Qui Gon grabbed Obi Wan's wrists
and held them above his head. His voice thick with lust, he
whispered, "I want to look at you."
Obi Wan held still, watching his master as his master's eyes
roved over him. The look on his master's face made his heart
want to burst. It was a look full of intense longing, edged
with deep tenderness. Obi Wan had never before felt so loved,
so valued. Qui Gon's eyes returned to his face, "You are so
damn beautiful, my Padawan." He said, releasing Obi Wan's
wrists. "I dreamt of you every night. Remembering how you look,
spread out like this, naked, in my arms, flushed with desire."
Unable to think of a response, Obi Wan sat up and touched his
master's face. It was all there, in that touch. His intense
love for Qui Gon, his need for him. Qui Gon caught the hand in
his large one and kissed it. 'Gods, I missed those hands,' Obi
Wan thought.
The edges of Qui Gon's mouth turned up and Obi Wan knew his
thoughts had been sensed by the older man. Did you? Qui
Gon asked, kissing the inside of Obi Wan's wrist. And what
precisely did you miss them doing?
Opening his mind to Qui Gon, Obi Wan sent him images. Qui
Gon's hands on him, touching his face, his chest, squeezing his
nipples, stroking his cock, holding his hips as Qui Gon thrust
into him.
Qui Gon groaned and pulled Obi Wan fully against him, kissing
him. I think I can arrange that. He lowered the younger
man back to the bed, his lips still glued to Obi Wan's. Lying
next to him, Qui Gon deepened the kiss, his tongue moving into
Obi Wan's mouth. His right hand roamed over Obi Wan, up his
side, across his chest, down to his abdomen, and back up again,
fingers moving around his apprentice's hardening nipple.
Obi Wan gasped into his master's mouth. Tangling his hands in
Qui Gon's hair Obi Wan returned his master's kiss. He drew the
other man's tongue into his mouth, sucked it. Then released it,
replacing it with his lower lip.
Qui Gon's hand moved to Obi Wan's other nipple. He stroked
softly, it hardened under his fingertips, sending a burst of
electric pleasure up into his fingers.
Pulling his mouth from Obi Wan's he moved downward. Trailing
kisses down Obi Wan's chest he moved toward his destination--
his apprentice's straining cock.
As Qui Gon's mouth closed over his cock, Obi Wan had to bite
his lip to keep from screaming. A few minutes of his master's
skillful ministrations and he was near coming. But he wasn't
ready, not yet. He pulled Qui Gon's head upward, sensing his
master's reluctance to release his prize. Qui Gon raised his
head and Obi Wan dove for him. Kissing him with fierce abandon,
Obi Wan urged Qui Gon onto his back. He lie atop his master,
alternating between kissing his lips and nuzzling his neck.
Qui Gon clung to his apprentice, his arms and legs wrapped
around him. Obi Wan filled his senses, his scent, the warmth of
his skin, the firm young flesh pressed into his, the skillful
mouth playing across him. Nothing compared to this, to having
his beloved in his arms, in his mind. He wanted to be inside
Obi Wan, to feel surrounded by him, lost in him.
Straddling his master's hips Obi Wan reached for the oil kept
atop the headboard. He slowly oiled his master's cock. Loving
the feel of that firm flesh in his hands, he stroked slowly up
the underside of his master's cock with an oiled palm. Then
down the other side with the other hand. Taking it between his
palms, deliberately not encircling it with his fingers, Obi Wan
stroked up and down. Qui Gon's feelings flowed to him. The
sensations shooting through his master came to Obi Wan so
clearly that they were almost his own. Qui Gon's need to be
inside him had become nearly unbearable.
Obi Wan moved over his master's cock, placing it at the
entrance to his anus. He relaxed fully, letting himself slide
down onto it. He gave himself over to the now familiar
sensation of Qui Gon inside him, Qui Gon filling him. He looked
down at his master, eyes lovingly tracing the familiar face. He
started to move slowly, but it was not enough. All of the lust
and longing which had built up during their separation poured
through him, and Obi Wan began to move rapidly, demandingly.
Qui Gon's powerful hands grasped his hips and held him still.
Obi Wan cried out in frustration. Qui Gon began moving him
slowly, seeking the place they both knew was there, the place
that would bring them both a profound ecstasy. There. Qui Gon
felt it and moved very slowly. In that instant, they came, mind
and bodies linked.
Still shuddering Obi Wan collapsed onto his master's chest,
grateful for the strength in those encircling arms. Part of him
wanted to say what he was feeling, to pour it out in a rush.
But he knew there was really no need. Qui Gon knew. He always
knew.
Qui Gon kissed the top his head. "There is something to be
said for restraint, my young Padawan," he said softly.
Obi Wan looked up at him. Brushing his master's lips briefly
with his own, he replied, "Yes, Master." Then he returned his
head to the crook of Qui Gon's shoulder, where it fit so
perfectly.
Obi Wan woke. He was nestled against Qui Gon's back, his arm
around his master's chest. He allowed himself to savor the
luxury of waking up next to his master. He had missed this.
Then he remembered the surprise he had purchased on his trip.
He rose carefully and went to the other room to retrieve his
knapsack. He quickly returned to the bed chamber. Placing the
object where Qui Gon would not see it, he slid back into his
master's bed.
Softly, the contact so light it was almost not there, he
kissed the back of Qui Gon's neck, stroking his hair. He sensed
his master stirring and moved his lips to the side of his neck.
He nibbled gently, then nipped at an ear lobe. Qui Gon's
awareness of his surroundings increased, and he came fully
awake as obi Wan's tongue slid into his ear.
Qui Gon started to turn over, seeking to take Obi Wan into his
arms. Obi Wan placed a hand on his shoulder and moved him
gently back onto his side. "If you move or speak master I will
stop. You do not want that do you?" Obi Wan asked, his voice
quiet, his tone firm.
"No"
"Good. Now don't speak again." With that Obi Wan returned his
full attention to his master's ear. He nipped softly along the
edge of it. Then ran his tongue along it. Qui Gon closed his
eyes, savoring the sensation.
Obi Wan resumed caressing Qui Gon's neck. He traced the side
of it, from just under the ear to the nape, with his fingers.
It was one of those there/almost not there touches. He knew Qui
Gon found touches like that maddening. He intended to use alot
of them.
He followed his fingers with his lips. He began with light
brushes of his lips, then traced the same path again. The
caress a little firmer this time. He did it again, still
firmer. Qui Gon was practically squirming. "Keep still or I
stop," he reminded his master. Qui Gon stilled. He took a
little bit of skin from an especially sensitive part of Qui
Gon's neck into his mouth and sucked gently, increasing the
strength of his sucking slowly.
At the same time he moved his hand over Qui Gon's side
stroking along his ribs. When he reached his hips, Obi Wan
moved the hand over Qui Gon's hip, avoiding the cock that
leaped in anticipation of his touch. The hand snaked up Qui
Gon's front across his abdomen and chest, brushing lightly
against hardened nipples. He felt Qui Gon suppress a moan.
'Good,' he smiled to himself. It was a heady feeling, having
free reign of his master's body like this. Being the one in
control.
He let go of his master's neck, wondering vaguely if he had
left a mark. The thought of his master with a hickey almost
made him giggle. But he controlled his thoughts and resumed
caressing his master's nipple. His touch was firmer now, but
not what Qui Gon wanted. Relenting, he squeezed it between his
thumb and forefinger. Rewarded, he sensed Qui Gon struggle to
control another moan. He failed.
"Shhhh," Obi Wan soothed, turning Qui Gon onto his back.
Spreading himself out along his master, he attended to the side
of Qui Gon's neck which he had been able to reach earlier. Qui
Gon started to wrap his arms around the man atop him but Obi
Wan stopped him. Remember, if you move I stop. His arms
returned to his sides, his hands gripping the sheets.
Satisfied that his master's neck and ear had received their
due, Obi Wan inched further down Qui Gon's body. His mouth
danced across Qui Gon's chest nipping, licking, blowing lightly
on flesh wet with saliva. Straddling his master's hips. He ran
his hands up Qui Gon's arms. The feel of hard muscle under his
hands sent a thrill through Obi Wan. He continued, savoring his
master's broad shoulders, before moving down across his chest.
Reaching his master's waist, he reversed direction. As his
hands slid down to Qui Gon's hands, he gently removed them from
the sheets. He brought first one and then the other to his
mouth, sucking on a fingertip, grazing it with his teeth. He
reached into Qui Gon's mind, encouraging him to imagine that
sucking, those teeth on another location. Qui Gon groaned at
the thought.
Smiling softly to himself, Obi Wan released his master's hands
and moved lower, kneeling between his legs. He moved his hands
along them. Hard muscle under his hands. Up Qui Gon's inner
thighs he traced, his thumbs moving along the side of his
testicles. Close your eyes he commanded.
Shuddering with anticipation, Qui Gon complied. The bottle of
oil flew to Obi Wan's hand. Moistening a finger, he moved it
along the rim of Qui Gon's asshole, then pushed forward slowly.
Qui Gon arched. Obi Wan stopped. When his master was again
lying flat on the bed, he resumed pushing forward. When his
finger was all of the way inside his master, he paused, then
began to withdraw it slowly. After a few more strokes a second
finger joined the first. Qui Gon was struggling for control,
struggling to keep from moving onto Obi Wan's hands. Obi Wan
touched his mind. You are doing very well, Master. If you
continue to do so I may let you speak, he paused, or are
you beyond coherent speech? Qui Gon moaned. I thought
so, Obi Wan replied. His pleasure in his master's aroused
state shining through him.
Obi Wan withdrew his fingers and reached for the gift he had
purchased for his master. Qui Gon, lost without those fingers,
started to open his eyes. "Uh-Uh, the eyes stay closed," Obi
Wan admonished.
Obi Wan applied the oil to the dildo in his hands. It was not
large, but then Obi Wan shared Master Yoda's view that size
mattered not. Oiling complete, he placed the item at Qui Gon's
entrance. Qui Gon started at the feel, wondering what it was
that Obi Wan held. Relax Master. Trust me. I will not hurt
you. Qui Gon responded to the familiar words by doing as
his apprentice asked. He relaxed and the dildo slid easily
inside him.
Qui Gon was lost in sensation. In the peculiar feeling of
being penetrated by his padawan, and yet not. He could not
believe that this was really happening, that he had allowed it
to happen. Qui Gon Jinn was not a man who surrendered. He was
always in control. That is what lie beneath his legendary calm.
Only one person had ever gotten past that control, ever had him
so beside himself with desire that he had acted in ways he had
never imagined himself capable of being. That same person was
now fucking him, with an unknown object. And Qui Gon didn't
fight it. All that mattered was pleasing Obi Wan. If Obi Wan
wanted this, then Qui Gon would allow it.
Obi Wan moved the artificial cock inside his master slowly,
very slowly. Qui Gon was moaning incoherently now. His hands
clenching and unclenching around the sheets. Obi Wan decided it
was time to send his master over the edge. Open your eyes,
love. Look at me. Watch. Obi Wan gazed directly into Qui
Gon's eyes for a moment. He gloried in seeing his master like
this, open, vulnerable, more aroused than Obi Wan had ever seen
him. Smiling gently, he lowered his head and took his master's
cock into his mouth. The warm wetness of Obi Wan's mouth
combined with the dildo still moving within him to send Qui Gon
into a shattering orgasm. Obi Wan swallowed again and again,
drinking in his master's juices, further intensifying Qui Gon's
pleasure. Obi Wan stopped moving the dildo when his master
came, resuming as his spasms subsided. In a moment Qui Gon was
coming again. "Obi Wan," he cried out.
As his second orgasm subsided, Qui Gon sat up, reaching for
the man kneeling between his legs, kissing him. You, Obi
Wan, you.
Obi Wan understood exactly what his master meant. He withdrew
the dildo. Then he kissed his master with a tenderness that
left them both aching. Gently he urged Qui Gon onto his
stomach. He ran his fingers along his master's cheeks, parting
them with oiled fingers. Assuring himself, there was enough
lubricant left from the dildo, he positioned himself behind his
master. Then he slid forward. Afterward, he would swear to
himself that he saw stars.
Obi Wan had never penetrated anyone in this fashion before.
Being inside his master brought him an intense, indescribable
pleasure. It was tight and hot. He reached out for his master,
seeking to draw him deeper into his mind, even as he slid
deeper into Qui Gon's body.
For Qui Gon too this was new. All of his lovers prior to his
Padawan had been women. No one had ever been inside him before.
He had believed that he knew what it felt like from sharing Obi
Wan's mind. But he had not. The feeling of being stretched and
opened was entirely unexpected. He felt both completely exposed
and totally safe. Obi Wan was inside him. Obi Wan loved him.
Obi Wan...
Qui Gon groaned. Give yourself to me, surrender to me
Obi Wan's voice urged softly in his mind. Obi Wan held his
himself completely still, leaving Qui Gon to be the one to
move, to find their rhythm. Qui Gon began to move and Obi Wan
reached a hand around to cup his master's cock. Qui Gon rocked
himself back onto Obi Wan's cock and then forward onto his
hand. All was pure sensation, and Obi Wan.
After what seemed like both an eternity and a heartbeat, he
came. And Obi Wan came with him. They rocked together. Their
focus on each other so complete that not even a moan escaped.
When he stopped shaking, Qui Gon was convinced that he would
never move again. His muscles were simply no longer capable of
it. They had become gelatinous. Obi Wan moved up on the bed,
beside him. Qui Gon turned over and stared at his young lover
in wonder. Reaching up he stroked his cheek, "You are
incredible."
Obi Wan's face split into a wide grin. "I am glad you enjoyed
yourself master."
"I'm sure you are," Qui Gon laughed. He was in that state that
comes from truly incredible sex, the one where all is right
with the world, where nothing can be felt but joy. "How...how
did you ever?"
"I needed something to think about during those long lonely
nights on Camaas." Obi Wan grinned even wider. "Fantasizing
about you seemed a very worthwhile way to spend my time."
"Indeed."
Obi Wan laughed, "Of course, that master of jedi control, Qui
Gon Jinn, would never allow himself the luxury of a little
fantasy."
"Never," Qui Gon agreed, "Unless you were in it." He pulled
Obi Wan against him, kissing him fervently. You, you, Obi
Wan, are the only one who has ever been able to make me lose
control.
I know. Obi Wan replied. He pulled away from his
master's demanding mouth, to look into his face. "There is
something to be said for a lack of restraint, Master."
"So I am beginning to see." Qui Gon answered, reaching again
for his apprentice.
If you keep kissing me like that we'll never get
breakfast.
Qui Gon sent Obi Wan a tendril of surprise at the thought.
I thought you knew Obi Wan. You are breakfast.
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