Category: POV,angst
Rating: PG
Pairings: Obi-Wan/Qui-Gon
Warnings: a missing scene in TPM, and very TPM canon so
beware
Summary: Obi-Wan standing vigil at Qui-Gon's funeral.
Archive: m_a and my web page.
website: http://members.aol.com/Beagles4Us/fic.html
Feedback: yes, please, any comments welcome.
Disclaimer: All thing Star Wars belongs to George Lucas and we
bow to his greatness...
Obi-Wan stood staring as the last of the embers of the funeral
pyre cooled and died out. He'd been here since early morning
when, they had laid Qui-Gon on the pyre and began the
preparations. He'd only left once to answer a summons from Yoda
with his decision on the fate of the boy.
"Be here, you should not," He heard from Master Yaddi, the
member of the council who prepared his master.
"Where else should I be?" Obi-Wan asked.
The Jedi Master had no answer for him.
"Help us, you should not," He heard again as he arranged
Qui-Gon's clothing, making sure every fold was perfect, making
sure the swatch of his Master's cloak he'd cut away was never
seen.
He stayed and meditated through the course of the day, while
the other council members arrived on Naboo and payed proper
homage to the Queen. Qui-Gon had been his teacher, his friend,
his lover and he had loved the man in every way possible for
thirteen years. So he stayed, and used the time until the pyre
was lit to dwell in his memories. He opened his mind, which
he'd kept shielded since Qui-Gon's death, and felt the Force
flow through him. Its presence, however, was marred by the
absence of the connection he shared with his Master. He felt
the hollowness left by Qui-Gon's absence. The silken threads of
their connection had tied them together until he didn't
remember what it had felt like not to have it, until now.
His reflections were interrupted as the Jedi Council members
and respected guests began to file into the pavilion. Obi-Wan
looked down to find Anakin at his side. Now he was the Master,
Anakin his Padawan Learner. His last promise to his master, he
intended to fullfill, he'd train the boy.
Obi-Wan lit the pyre himself, having asked Master Yoda and
Master Windu earlier, to be the one to commit his lover to the
flames that would send his body to join his spirit. He watched
as the flames overcame his teacher and for a brief moment, when
the flames and the body merged, he felt as if Qui-Gon was there
with him. No sooner had the feeling over came him, than it was
gone again.
And still he stayed, long past when the other Jedi left. He
assumed Anakin was taken back to Amidala's palace, but by whom,
he didn't know. He stayed long past when the flames died,
leaving only hot coals glowing brightly in the night. Morning
found him still there as the coals had cooled and died out.
Obi-Wan waited until the heat no longer rose from the stones.
Now it was time. He pulled the small square of cloth from a
fold in his belt and walked over to where there was nothing
left but ashes, where Qui-Gon once lay. He knew the spot, where
Qui-Gon's heart had been, and quickly scooped ashes up and
dropping them into the cloth, and tying it with a leather thong
before returning to it his belt. Now, not only did he carry his
memories of his Master, but he also carried a piece of the man
he loved. When he finished grieving and had healed his heart he
would commit the small bit of ashes to be carried in the wind.
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