And Now for Something Completely Different... Part B

by Kaiburr (kwanyin4@aol.com)

Archive: master_apprentice, OKEB, and anyone else that wants it, just ask.

Category: humour/parody

Rating: PG13

Warnings: This is what happens when you haven't gotten sleep in a week.

Summary: The Phantom Menace meets Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Disclaimer: GL owns TPM (and almost everything else) and a bunch of english blokes own Python.

Feedback: The feedback on the last one inspired me to do this. (At least, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.) So if I get more feedback and less sleep, there may be a C.

**This product was not tested on either llamas or betas. Read at your own peril.**

***Again, think Monty Python and the Holy Grail***

    [thud]    [clang]
YODA:  Your dead you will bring out!    [clang]
Your dead you will bring out!    [clang]    
Your dead you will bring out[clang]
Your dead you will bring out!    [clang]    
Your dead you will bring out!    [cough cough...]
    [clang]    [...cough cough]    
Your dead you will bring out!    [clang]
Your dead you will bring out!    [clang]    
Your dead you will bring out!  Nine credits. [clang]    
Your dead you will bring out!    [clang]    
Your dead you will bring out!
    [clang]    Your dead   [rewr!]     ... you will bring out, yes!    
[rewr!]    [clang]
Your dead you will bring out!

OBI-WAN:  Here's one.

YODA:  Nine credits, that will be.

QUI-GON:  I'm not dead!

YODA:  What?

OBI-WAN:  Nothing.  Here's your nine credits.

QUI-GON:  I'm not dead!

YODA:  Claims he is not dead, he does!

OBI-WAN:  Yes, he is.

QUI-GON:  I'm not!

YODA:  Is he not?

OBI-WAN:  Well, he will be soon.  He's just been run through with a 
lightsabre.

QUI-GON:  I'm getting better! 

OBI-WAN:  No, you're not.  You'll be one with the Force in a moment.

YODA:  Take him like that, I can not.  Against the Code, it is.

QUI-GON:  I don't want to go on the pyre!

OBI-WAN:  Oh, don't be such a baby.

YODA:  Take him like that, I can not.

QUI-GON:  I feel fine!

OBI-WAN:  Well, do us a favour.

YODA:  Unable to, I am.

OBI-WAN:  Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes?  He won't be long.

YODA:  No, return to Coruscant I must.  Need my archaic mutterings, the 
Council does.

OBI-WAN:  Well, when's your next round?

YODA:  Thursday.

QUI-GON:  I think I'll go for a walk.

OBI-WAN:  You're not fooling anyone, you know.  Look.  Isn't there something 
you can do?

QUI-GON:  [singing]  I feel the Force.  I feel happy.    [YODA whops QUI-GON 
over the head with his gimmer stick.]

OBI-WAN:  Ah, thanks very much.  [dumps QUI-GON on funeral pyre.]

YODA:  Thank me, you need not.  See you on Thursday, I will.

OBI-WAN:  Right.  All right.    

THE END (thank goodness.)