SERIES: Well, i'm not really sure how this is going to turn
out, there is a sort of sequel in progress, so we'll see
PAIRING: O/Q
SUMMARY: More than two years post TPM in which Qui-Gon is just
fine thank you, an attack on Obi-Wan in the Temple leads to a
mystery and a bonding between the boys
RATING: Slash NC-17
ARCHIVE: MA is all right, anyone else who wants it please ask
DISCLAIMER: I only own these boys and thier universe in my rich
fantasy life where i ride around on a pony and live in a
castle. in real life, well i could have a really nice car or a
small house for how much i owe the government; would it really
be worth it to sue me?
NOTES: okay, so this is my first posted tpm peice, it isn't
really beta'd so all mistakes are mine and i take full and
complete responsibility for them. However, i would like to
thank Dae for all here great support while i was writing this
and for helping to keep my going and actually finish the thing.
FEEDBACK: oh, that would be nice
WARNINGS: nope, not so you'd notice
Obi-Wan Kenobi strode wearily through the halls of the Jedi
Temple. His transport had landed only moments before and
already he had been summoned before the Council to report on
his latest mission. He had a feeling that his urgent call to
the Council had more to do with a new assignment than any
questions the Council might have concerning his last mission.
It had gone quite smoothly, comparatively speaking. He hadn't
even had to run for his life on this one, and anytime no one
ended up in a bacta tank had to be good.
Obi-Wan had been spending a great deal of time on missions away
from Coruscant. It seemed as though as soon as he was Knighted
the Council had taken great delight in assigning him the most
dangerous and taxing mission they could find. The pace and
difficulty did not ease noticeably when his former master
finally accepted a position on the council, though he knew that
behind closed doors at least one of the council members was on
his side.
He had not even had time to stop by his quarters and drop off
his travel pack or change clothes as he entered the waiting
room to the council chamber. Straightening his Jedi robes the
best he could, he dropped his pack on the floor near the door,
assumed a look of calm acceptable and entered the chamber.
Walking silently to the center of the room he nodded to the
masters in the circle. His eyes automatically sought those of
his former master, eyes he knew better than any other in the
universe, eyes that always brought him assurance. Qui-Gon's
head dipped in an almost imperceptible nod, though Obi-Wan saw
it quite clearly and felt a certain pressure within him release
that he hadn't known existed until it was gone.
"Knight Kenobi, what have you to report on your latest
mission?" Master Windu asked him once he was in place.
"The coronation ceremony on Rolina progressed with minimal
problems. The King is now in power with the stable backing of
the military and the majority of the political factions. Some
fighting did occur in the cities, though it was resolved with
minimal use of force and no lives were lost. The negotiations
between the King and the radical liberation factions concluded
successfully, ending in peaceful terms acceptable to both
sides. Some animosity remains, though the people seem unwilling
to allow violence to once again take over their lives." The
mission in those terms sounded almost easy. It was only when
considering the weeks of little or no sleep on his part to make
sure everything ran smoothly as well as the countless hours of
diplomatic talks that went into the mission that the signs of
work could be found.
Mace nodded and Yoda spoke. "Well you have done. Word from
Rolina we have received. Speak highly of you they do, Knight.
Latest in a list of worlds who speak well of your help.
Commended you should be."
Obi-Wan merely nodded, waiting for his next assignment as he
knew there would be. They did not call him to the Council
chambers the moment he landed to congratulate him.
"Another mission there is for you," Yoda said once it was
apparent that Obi-Wan knew of their plans for him. "Trouble is
stirring on Albestri, war is imminent, and the Senate cannot
afford to be drawn into a war in that sector. Been there before
you have, with success, go again you must to prevent war.
Transport we have arranged for you, leave at sunset you will."
"Yes, Master." Outwardly compliant, inwardly Obi-Wan sighed.
The Albestrians were cantankerous and warlike at the best of
times, and he knew he would have a long, difficult time ahead
of him.
"May the Force be with you." Yoda nodded to him, a dismissal.
Obi-Wan bowed once again to the Council and walked from the
room. Sunset. That gave him a grand total of six hours to enjoy
the comforts of his apartment he barely saw and catch up with
the few friends who might be on planet at the moment.
He was several steps down the corridor when he realized he had
forgotten his travel pack in the council's waiting room.
Apparently he was more tired that he thought. He turned back
and had nearly reached the door when Qui-Gon exited with the
pack in his hands. His former master gave him a slight smile
and handed the pack over.
"Thank you, Master." Despite the fact that Obi-Wan had been a
Knight for better than two years now, he still found himself
falling into the old habits when around the other man.
"Tired, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan nodded as he resumed his course back down the hall,
this time accompanied by the older man. "This last mission was,
stressful."
"I'm sorry you have so little time before we send you off on
another one. If you weren't the best for the job..." Qui-Gon
shrugged.
"Perhaps I should consider performing a little less
exemplarily." Obi-Wan grinned, not in the least serious.
"Really, what do they hope to accomplish? Wearing us out will
not help anyone in the long run." He paused. "Though I suppose
the question is really what do you hope to accomplish? Being a
council member and all. How do you fund your new assignment?"
Qui-Gon shook his head. "Dry and frustrating. It is like
sitting at a mediation every day instead of just for a few
weeks at a time. I keep trying to tell them we are wearing out
our best operatives, but no one seems to be willing to listen.
It has been too long a time for most of them to remember what
it is like to be constantly out in the field."
Obi-Wan nodded at the other man's words, though he in truth was
only half listening. The very presence of the man and his
soothing voice that had been such a constant for most of his
life was like a balm on his weary soul. Despite the fact that
he was rarely on Coruscant, he made it a point to visit with
his former master whenever time permitted. The past two years
had been rushed to say the least and the small amount of
normalcy that Qui-Gon provided in his life was something he
found himself looking forward to.
"Don't you think, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon finished.
Obi-Wan looked at the other man blankly for a moment realizing
his mind had wandered a little far afield. "I'm sorry, Master,
I didn't catch the last part."
Qui-Gon smiled at him, though concern touched his eyes. "It's
quite all right Obi-Wan. Are you well? I know the missions have
been taxing, but if you are ill--"
Obi-Wan held up a hand and shook his head. "No, no nothing like
that, I'm just tired." He didn't mention that since his
knighting he had barely slept more than five hours a night. For
some reason sleep eluded him, even when he was in a position
that allowed him to relax.
"Well, then I won't monopolize your time then. You only have a
few hours and it is probably best if you spend it resting."
Qui-Gon placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.
Obi-Wan was not quite sure if he had seen a glimmer of regret
in Qui-Gon's eyes. "Is that an order, Master?" Obi-Wan grinned
at him in response.
Qui-Gon's lips lifted in a slight grin. "Old habits."
"I can sleep anytime, Qui-Gon, I very rarely see you in person,
I thought we might talk. that is unless you have some other
obligation." Obi-Wan briefly regretted the pressured formality
that had crept into their speech over the past two years. He
could remember a time when he was never more comfortable than
when he was with the other man.
"No, I would very much enjoy that Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan followed the other man through the hallways, briefly
greeting the few faces he recognized, before he understood
where they were going. Their apartment. Well, Qui- Gon's
apartment now, though it had been his home as well for twelve
years.
He entered the apartment without a word, a subtle yet profound
sense of home sweeping through him. He drew a breath noting it
even smelled the same. He had not been back in these rooms
since his knighting, his time on Coruscant had never allowed it
in the past.
"It's exactly the same." The words were out of his mouth before
he could stop them.
"Well, not exactly." He heard Qui-Gon laugh as the other man
walked into the small kitchen to start tea. "Your room is
empty, for one. Oh, and I shifted the couch, just a little."
Obi-Wan smiled as he settled on the couch. He felt truly
relaxed for the first time in, well longer than he cared to
remember. A Jedi carried his home with him, but still, there
was something to be said for a sense of permanence in one's
life.
The empty room triggered a thought. "How is Anakin?"
"He's progressing well. Master Helvet is quite capable in
dealing with him. She was a good choice." Qui-Gon handed him a
cup as he settled next to him on the couch. After the events on
Naboo, the Council had seen the need to have the boy trained
despite his age. As a result of his injury and further thought
on the matter, Qui-Gon had recommended the boy be taught by
someone else. The Council had agreed. "I see him often, with
the other students, practicing. He is coming along very well."
"Have you considered taking another Padawan?"
Qui-Gon shook his head. "I do not believe I will ever take
another, Obi-Wan. You were the last."
Obi-Wan sat in stunned silence for a moment. He had always
thought that Qui-Gon had been proud of him, happy with his
choice to take him as Padawan, but if he was refusing yet again
to take another one...
Qui-Gon looked up as though sensing his thought. He shook his
head more forcefully. "No, Obi-Wan, I know what you're
thinking, it isn't like that at all. Any Padawan I trained
after you, I couldn't help but compare the child to you. I
could not have asked for a finer student, the Jedi I see before
me today astounds me. No, any Padawan would only live in your
shadow for me."
Obi-Wan didn't know what to say. "I am what I am only because I
had the best Master."
Qui-Gon smiled, though he said nothing.
They sat in companionable silence for a while, simply enjoying
each others company.
"Have you heard from Bant?" Qui-Gon asked him after a few long
moments.
"The last message I received from her was," he paused to think.
"A month ago, I think. She and her master were just returning
from a mission to Jelsievan. She must be coming up on her
knighting soon, I would think."
"Yes, Allia thinks that Bant will be ready very soon."
"Hmmm, I had hoped to be here when she was knighted, though it
looks like I be away for quite some time."
They spoke together in quite comfort for nearly an hour, though
Obi-Wan's responses became more and more monosyllabic as the
time passed. The familiar comfort of the room seemed to leak
into his very bones. Finally Qui-Gon stood with a laugh.
"Enough, Obi-Wan. You need sleep, you are barely awake as it
is." He offered his hand.
Obi-Wan stood, thinking of the long journey back to his
quarters, nearly on the opposite side of the Temple. Still, he
could no longer successfully battle his body's need for sleep.
"I bow to your greater wisdom, Master," he said with a grin,
moving towards the door.
"Obi-Wan, wait," Qui-Gon hesitated briefly, as if unsure what
to say. "I, your old room is still here, and your quarters are
quite far away. You could sleep here. If you wish."
Obi-Wan smiled at the unexpected offer. "That would be most
welcome, thank you." He headed to the door of his old room,
pausing before entering. "Will you be here when I wake, or do
you have meetings?"
"No, Obi-Wan, I will be here. Sleep well."
Obi-Wan woke slowly, his internal time sense telling him he
had only an hour before his transport would leave. The familiar
surroundings only registered as odd when he was fully awake,
remembering that he no longer lived in that room. He stretched,
feeling more refreshed from the short four-hour sleep than he
had in months.
Once he had collected himself, we went out into the main room
to find Qui-Gon in a strikingly familiar position, poised over
a data pad, writing some sort of report.
"Being a council member doesn't excuse you from writing
reports?"
Qui-Gon turned to look at him favoring him with a smile. "On
the contrary, I have to write more of them now than I ever did
in the past. Do you have time to eat?"
Obi-Wan considered. "I believe so, yes. Something fast, in any
case."
Qui-Gon moved in to the kitchen, laughing. "You mean you don't
want me to try to prepare anything more substantial?"
"No, thanks all the same. You are the reason the Council
created the general dining hall. You would probably starve if
left on your own, and I would have too, until I learned to
cook." He followed the older man into the kitchen and leaned
against one of the counters, watching Qui-Gon throws some
meats, cheeses and bread on a plate. Giving the man a smile, he
couldn't resist the comment. "Extraordinary culinary skills as
always, I see."
"Yes, well, one must keep one's reputation." Qui-Gon returned
his smile, the expression lightening his features and making
him look far younger than his actual years.
They ate together quickly, and in silence, though comfortable.
When they finished, Obi- Wan helped him clean up and then it
was time for him to go.
"One of these days, I am going to be here for more than a few
hours and you'll get sick of me." Obi-Wan commented as he stood
by the door.
"I could never see that happening, you will always be welcome
here Obi-Wan. It was good to see you. Take care of yourself,
the Albestrians can be brutal."
"Thank you, Qui-Gon. I will be careful. May the Force be with
you, always."
Qui-Gon echoed him, they shook hands and he left.
Obi-Wan took only a few moments to reflect on his time with his
former master. While he didn't consider himself a cowardly man
by nature, the fact that it had been two years since his
knighting and he had yet to speak of his... deeper feelings for
his master to his master could really not be considered
anything else. He was almost sure that the other man would be
receptive to him, but to be wrong. It would be crushing to say
the least.
Obi-Wan resolved that on his next visit Coruscant, if he had
more than a few scant hours, he would speak with Qui-Gon. Of
course, that's what he'd told himself after his last visit and
the one before that. Yet still, here he was on his way to
another mission for who knew how long again with the silence
and bouts of uncomfortable formality still rested between them.
As he walked, Obi-Wan decided to stop by his quarters to pick
up some things he would need for the mission. It wasn't that he
really needed all that much, he carried most of the esesntials
with him in his pack, but he supposed there was a principle
involved. The Council had gone to all the trouble to give him
the apartment, the least he could do was stop by every once in
a while.
When Obi-Wan keyed open the door to his apartment and entered,
he immediatly sensed something was wrong. Although at first
glance, he could see no one in the room, he could feel another
person through the Force, someone who meant him ill. As he
prepared to back out the door, his hand resting on his
lightsaber, the door to the outer room slid shut.
Without warning, pain flared along his nerves and Obi-Wan
sucked in a gasp of air in surprise and pain. He couldn't
identify the source of the attack, and he had no wound only an
indistinguished sense of pain and unease. Drawing a breath, he
reached calmly for the Force, only to realize it wasn't there.
Or, more acuratley, it was there, but he couldn't touch it.
When he moved closer to the door, intent on leaving, he found
it locked and unresponsive to his commands.
He quickly considered his options and he was just about to
slide his lightsaber through the door when something shot out
at him from across the room catching him in the right shoulder.
Intense pain swept through him and his lightsaber fell from
numb fingers. Obi- Wan struggled to stay on his feet to face
his attacker. He leaned against the door behind him, his eyes
searching the room. He could pinpoint the location of his
attacker and without the Force he could not call for help.
Another shot was fired across the room. This time, even though
Obi-Wan was ready for it, he could not avoid the blast as it
hit him in the chest. Pain spread and Obi-Wan slowly slid to
the floor. His chest and shoulder felt warm though the rest of
him was cold.
The figure finally stepped into view, though Obi-Wan's vision
was cloudy from pain. He tried to form words to ask why, but
could not concentrate. He knew he was fadig quickly, but
without the Force and at the mercy of his attacker, he couldn't
do anything to stop himself from sliding closer to
unconciousness.
"You should have stayed out of it, Kenobi." The features of his
attacker were still indisticnt but he recognized the voice.
As Obi-Wan tried to remember where he'd heard the voice before,
a pounding came from the door he was leaning on. He could hear
shouts from behind it, though he could not make out who was
calling.
The figure cursed and backed toward the window, which Obi-Wan
absently noted was missing the glass. "I'm sorry."
It was the last thing he heard before the pain flared through
him again and blackness overtook him.
Qui-Gon looked around his empty apartment that seemed that much
more empty from the absence of just one individual. Of course,
Obi-Wan was a special individual, he always had been. Still he
thought it odd that the rooms would feel so vastly different
without his presence.
Qui-Gon pushed the thoughts from his mind and tried instead to
concentrate on his latest report for the council. Qui-Gon was
not a man to avoid issues by nature, but some things he could
just not deal with. Not at the moment. He knew there was
something between Obi-Wan and himself, though he did not know
what exactly. He knew what he wanted to happen, but was afraid
those thoughts were simply the dreams of an old man. In any
case, it was nothing they could deal with at this point anyway.
Obi-Wan was rarely on Coruscant and to start anything now was
nothing short of folly.
Qui-Gon's gaze slid across the room as his mind wandered
despite his best efforts. He smiled slightly as his eyes fixed
on the worn travel pack on the other side of the room.
Standing, he crossed the room and picked up the pack for the
second time that day. He supposed he could call the younger man
and let him come pick up the pack on his way out. However, he
knew Obi-Wan was short on time and decided to bring the pack to
its owner once again. His decsion had nothing to do with the
fact that he wanted to spend more time with the younger man.
As Qui-Gon walked through the halls of the Temple, he slowly
became aware of somehting wrong. He couldn't quite determine
the exact nature of what he was sensing, but it was disturbing
and was growing in power the longer he was away form his room.
Then, a faint pain seemed to flare along his nerves, though he
recognized immediately that it was not his own. It had filtered
along the remnant of his training bond with Obi-Wan.
Qui-Gon broke into a Force-enhanced run toward his former
Padawan's quarters. He reached the door in only a few moments,
though the danger of the situation had increased and Qui-Gon
could feel the darkness like a physical presence. He tried to
open the door but found it locked, and he could not force it
open not matter how he tried.
He began pounding on the door, calling Obi-Wan's name, trying
anything to stop the danger that was aimed at his apprentice.
Another flash of pain ran along his nerves, this time much
stronger than before and then the faint link between Obi-Wan
and himself was silenced.
Qui-Gon brought all of his many years of training to bear
without concious thought. He calmed himself and concentrated
soley on the door to the apartment. It opened slowly, giving
grudgingly against the mechanicnal hold on the mechanisms. WHen
he finally managed to opened it, bloody body of Obi-Wan fell
out into the hall with a sickening thud.
Qui-Gon knelt next to Obi-Wan briefly scanning his injuries and
trying to distance himself from what he saw. Three distinct
wounds were apparent on the younger man's body, each bleeding
profusely. It was the two wounds to his chest that concerned
him the most. Obi- Wan was still, his eyes closed and his
already pale flesh was washed out.
Qui-Gon placed a shaking hand on his former apprentice's neck
feeling for a pulse. It was there, if only barely, thready and
weak. Obi-Wan's breath was labored and he did not respond to
Qui-Gon's presence at all.
Feeding his own Force energy into the other man, Qui-Gon
scooped the still body into his arms without a thought. He
began running through the halls towards the Healers. The dead
weight of an unconscious Obi-Wan in his arms was a feeling that
was all too familiar, and something he had hoped never to
experience again. Several times the younger man had been
injured on their missions together, requiring Qui-Gon to carry
his apprentice out of dangerous situations. He'd hated every
second of it.
He arrived at the Healers, not clearly remembering the route he
had taken to get there. He was focused entriely on Obi-Wan and
keeping the younger man alive.
Healer Bellain met him at the door and gently took Obi-Wan from
his arms, the picture of calm. He began questioning the Jedi
master as he laid the prone body on the nearest bed. "What
happened?"
Qui-Gon took a breath to calm himself before answering. "I"m
not entirely sure." He gave a breif description of what he knew
though it wasn't much. I really don't know anything else."
Qui-Gon hovered near the Healer's shoulder as he began running
instruments over the Knight's body.
"Is there anything I can do?" He felt so helpless.
"You're feeding him your force energy?"
Qui-Gon nodded.
"Good. Keep doing that, but stay out of the way."
Again, he nodded. Qui-Gon moved to a corner of the room and
settled into a meditative pose. He centered himself and fed
every ounce of spare energy he had to help Obi-Wan survive. It
never even occurred to him that Obi-Wan had done the same thing
for him more than two years before after the fight on Naboo.
He was aware long before he woke. Consciousness was a strange
and difficult concept that seemed to take more out of him that
he was willing to give at the moment. He drifted in a strange
place for a long time, somewhere between waking and darkness.
When he finally opened his eyes, it took him several moments to
understand the reason his vision was clouded was because he was
floating in a bacta tank.
Distantly he thought that whatever had happened must have been
bad if he had ended up in bacta. He shifted his head slowly,
the very movement taxing his strength. He caught sight of a
figure on the other side of the room, but did not have the
strength to acknowledge the other individual before he once
again was pulled into oblivion by sleep.
He woke again, this time more aware of his surroundings. He
recognized instantly that he was in a bacta tank, vaguely
remembering that he had woken before in the healing liquid. For
them not to have removed him after his initial awareness he
thought his injuries must have been very serious.
He looked around the room this time with more ease and his eyes
immediately fell upon the figure of Qui-Gon sitting in a chair
not far from the tank, asleep. He floated in the liquid
slightly distanced from everything around him. He could feel
the drugs they were feeding him to stem off infection and to
block pain. It was an uncomfortbale feeling, he couldn't focus
and he felt as though there was a block in his thoughts to keep
him from working properly.
Movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention and he
turned his head. A healer he wasn't familiar with was walking
towards him checking the paneling of the tank. He made a motion
with his hand and gave a questioning look to Obi-Wan asking if
Obi-Wan were ready to leave the tank. Obi-Wan nodded and he
floated to the top of the tank for removal.
The next time he woke Obi-Wan was clean, dressed and in one of
the beds of the infirmary. He lay still for a moment trying to
catalog his condition, though he found it disturbingly hard to
concentrate. A moment of panic flared through him as he tried
to grasp the Force and was unable.
A calming and familiar hand on his shoulder immediately settled
him. Qui-Gon leaned in and spoke to him softly. "Don't worry
about your connection to the Force, it will return when you are
taken off of the drugs. The," the other man paused and a look
of pain crossed Qui-Gon's face. "The damage was quite
extensive. You will need to remain on the medication for
several more days at least."
Obi-Wan understood what his former master was trying to tell
him only very generally. He couldn't think clearly. "Everything
is confusing." His voice was cracked and soft from lack of use.
Qui-Gon gently stroked his hair. "I know, Obi-Wan, the drugs
are necessary however."
"Oh." He trusted his master implicitly. If he said everything
was as it should be, then it was.
"Ah, our patient has decided to grace us with his presence.
Knight Kenobi, the unspoken agreement between Healer and
patient in a Bacta Tank is that when you are asked if you feel
ready to get out, you are supposed to stay awake through the
whole process." A face that he only vaguely recognized came
into his view next to his former master.
"Sorry." He didn't quite understand what the man was talking
about, but felt the need to apologize anyway.
The man shook his head. "I realize this will probably be lost
on you, but I am Bellain. I've been taking care of you since
the incident. How do you feel?"
Obi-Wan squinted in confusion for a moment. Incident? He
couldn't remember what Bellain was talking about.
"Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon's voice interrupted his sluggish thoughts.
"Hmmm?" he asked distantly, his eyes moving slowly from one
face to the other.
"How do you feel? Is there any pain?" His master seemed very
concerned, so he tried to concentrate to answer his question.
"I don't think so. No."
"All right, well enjoy it while you can. We'll be taking you
off the medication very slowly over the next few days. Sleep if
you can." Bellain nodded to him and moved out of range of his
vision.
"Should I hurt?" he asked Qui-Gon once the healer had left,
once again focusing his attention on the older man.
Qui-Gon looked at him for a long moment before answering. When
he finally spoke, his voice was strained, though Obi-Wan could
only distantly recall his question. "Yes, Obi- Wan, without the
drugs you would be hurting very much. Enough to keep you from
healing, which is why you are on them."
"Oh, sounds serious." He yawned, his eyes sliding shut of their
own accord, and he never heard Qui-Gon's reply if indeed the
older man had one.
His entire body hurt. Muscles, bones, tendons and skin all
screamed at him that he had done something very, very stupid.
Obi-Wan cracked his eyes open, even the light of the room was
painful. He closed his eyes and found there was pain there as
well. The longer he was awake the greater the pain grew and as
the pain grew the oblivion of sleep slipped further out of his
grasp. He couldn't even speak by the time he realized something
was very wrong.
"Obi-Wan?" The voice sounded distant but concerned. Although he
wanted to concentrate and answer he couldn't make anything
work.
"Bellain, something is wrong." He heard the voice call, but it
was all so distant and he hurt so badly.
"Obi-Wan, can you hear me?" Another voice was there, he wanted
to answer.
"Obi-Wan, give me some kind of sign if you can hear me, it is
very important."
He very slowly nodded his head, or at least he thought he did.
With the slight movement, the world exploded in pain. All sound
was blocked by the roaring in his ears. The very drawing of
breath was painful, but stopping hurt even more. Hands touched
his forehead and pain flared along his body from the point of
contact and he knew nothing more.
Qui-Gon watched in horror as the younger man arched off the bed
in extreme pain. He had sensed a growing amount of pain as the
younger man woke, but Bellain had told him to expect that, the
pain killers he had been on needed to be reduced. However,
after a few moments it was clear that Obi-Wan was in much
greater pain that he should be.
Bellain stepped back from the bed and took a breath. "I've set
a Force block on his pain, he should be all right for the
moment. What happened?"
Qui-Gon stared at the man incredulously. "What do you mean what
happened? You're the healer."
"I was not here, Master Jinn, you were. What did you sense,
what did you see?"
Qui-Gon took a breath. "He was waking slowly, there was pain
just as you said, but it seemed to grow very quickly. I don't
know more than that. Why did that happen, Bellain, you said
that if he was taken off the pain killers he would be fine."
Qui-Gon tried his best to keep the accusation out of his voice.
"I don't know, he should have been. He shouldn't have had that
reaction. I'm going to run some more tests and look at his
records. He'll be fine for right now, at least until I can
figure out what went wrong." He turned to leave, but before he
was out of the room, he turned back. "You could do with some
rest Qui-Gon. You'll do no one any good if you fall down from
exhaustion."
"I am far from that point, Healer. I will stay here, thank
you."
The other man nodded, as though he hadn't really expected any
other answer and left the room.
Qui-Gon looked down at the pale face of his former apprentice.
During their years together, Obi-Wan had been hurt many times.
He'd sat in this very infirmary and others very much like it
more times than he cared to remember as kept silent watch over
the young man as he recovered from injury and illness. Somehow,
this was worse. This time Obi-Wan had not been attacked on some
distant plant, but instead in the Temple, in his own home.
Qui-Gon had not let himself think about the implications of
that statement yet; he had been too focused on Obi-Wan. Now,
however, the thought crept into his mind. He nearly shuddered
to think what may have happened if he had not chosen to bring
Obi-Wan his pack.
"Worry for him, you do." The voice of his former master pulled
him from his thoughts. "A fine Knight he is now, your
apprentice no longer. Not by many years."
"And do you not worry for me when I am injured, Master?"
Yoda nodded his head conceding the point. "Felt a disturbance
in the Force, I did. Something has happened?"
Qui-Gon sighed and nodded quickly filling in Yoda on what had
just happened. As he spoke, his former master moved closer to
Obi-Wan's bed and placed a small green hand on him. He was
silent as he concentrated.
When he opened his eyes, they were serious. "Something, I feel
in him. Know what it is I do not. Speak with the healers I
must. Stay with him."
Qui-Gon watched the retreating back of his small master and
wondered what else the small Jedi thought he would do. He
didn't think he could do anything other than stay and watch
over the young man who had come to mean so very much in his
life.
The last few years of Obi-Wan's apprenticeship, Qui-Gon had
noticed a subtle change in his feelings toward his Padawan. He
had struggled with it for a long time before realizing it was
nothing of which he should be ashamed. Love was never wrong; it
was beautiful in and of itself. He had never let his Padawan
know of his feelings, certain that the younger man would never
return them, but he had found a certain measure of peace within
himself.
When Obi-Wan had been Knighted, after Naboo, it had been one of
the most profound moments of his life. Qui-Gon found himself
filled with conflicting emotions. He was proud that Obi-Wan had
become such a strong and confident Jedi, he was delighted to
see the Knighting of his Padawan. At the same time he found
himself deeply saddened as well. He'd grown used to the
physical and mental presence of Obi-Wan in his life and with
the Knighting both had been reduced drastically.
Obi-Wan had been sent on missions on his own, and their
Master-Padawan link would slowly began to fade. It would always
be there, a slight glimmer of presence in his mind unless
actively destroyed. However, it would never be as strong as it
had been in the last years of their time together.
Watching the still face of the young Knight now, he felt a
sense of helplessness rise in him. He had not been able to
protect him, nor could he do anything now to help him. His only
hope was to believe that Obi-Wan would recover fully. It was
only a hope at this point, though.
He reached his hand out to touch the other man, reassure him
even in his present state that he was there. Before his hand
made contact however, a voice called out from the other side of
the room. "Master Jinn, wait!" Healer Bellain strode quickly
toward him. "Don't touch him just yet. Master Yoda and I have a
theory, and contact is the last thing we need to deal with
right now. Please come with me." Qui-Gon let his hand drop and
he followed the Healer a short distance away.
"Tell me, what do you feel?"
"I'm sorry?" Qui-Gon asked, confused.
"How do you feel, please examine yourself closely. This is
every important."
He was inclined to argue, but noting the serious look in the
Healer's eyes Qui-Gon carefully took stock of himself. Only
then did he notice a slight strangeness to his presence. It was
a kind of pressure at the back of his neck, a slight aching
throughout his body. He look questioning at Bellain. "There is
something."
Bellain nodded. "Follow me, please."
Qui-Gon followed the man further from Obi-Wan and he noticed
the pressure increasing to something closer to pain. "Bellain,
what is the purpose of this?"
"You feel it stronger now?" It wasn't exactly a question.
"Yes, now can you please explain to me what is going on and
what this has to do with Obi- Wan?"
Bellain turned and began walking back toward his patient.
Qui-Gon released a breath he was unaware he had been holding as
he neared Obi-Wan.
"A bond you have formed with Obi-Wan." Yoda stated as he
entered the room.
"I don't see what our Master-Padawan bond has to do with this."
"Not that bond. Something else has formed. Becoming clear now
many things are."
Qui-Gon shook his head. "I don't understand."
"Always blind you were to things you didn't want to see,
Padawan."
Bellain took pity on him. "You remember Naboo?" he waited for
Qui-Gon's nod. "When you were injured, Obi-Wan fed you his own
life force to keep you alive until help arrived. Even then he
continued lending you his support through the Force until you
had nearly healed. Apparently that started something that none
of us recognized, the beginnings of a new bond. Unfortunately,
as you two have been separated for the better part of more than
two years no one was able to see that it was only partially
formed." Bellain paused. "You must have noticed since Naboo
that there was something slightly...off. Maybe you tired more
easily, or took longer to recover from injuries. I'm sure the
same held true for Obi- Wan."
Qui-Gon nodded. "Yes, but I thought that was a result of my
injury. That's what I was told." He paused and thought back
over the past few years. "Obi-Wan did tell me on more than one
occasion he had difficulty sleeping."
"Exactly. It can manifest itself in many different ways. You
may also have noticed that you felt better when you were in
each other's presence. That was the work of the bond trying to
complete itself. If it had been formed more completely, there
would have been much more drastic signs that we would have been
able to notice."
"This is facinating, but you still haven't told me what this
has to do with Obi-Wan's condition now."
"When found him you did, what did you do?" Yoda asked in his
best teaching tone, his eyebrows raised.
"I fed him my life force to keep him alive." he said slowly
"What do you do even now?" His former master asked him again.
Qui-Gon nodded. "The same. I understand that is how this bond
was formed, I am familiar with the concept. However, I fail to
see how this is connected to Obi-Wan's reaction."
"When the bond was furthered by your actions, most of that
time, Obi-Wan was heavily drugged by Force suppressing
medication. In effect, he was cut off from the Force for a
period of time. While the bond had time to settle further in
you, it did not with him. That's why his reaction to waking was
so strong. Without the drugs to keep him from the Force, the
more fully formed bond is being dropped onto him all at once."
Qui-Gon sat quietly for a moment looking at Obi-Wan. The
thought that they shared a bond was incredible. It meant that
they would again have a chance at the closeness they had
expereicned near the end of Obi-Wan's training. But it was
causing Obi-Wan so much pain, he didn't know what to do. He
didn't want the younger man to be in any more pain yet to lose
somehting so soon after finding it was difficult as well.
"How do we break it?" he asked finally, forcing his tone to
calmness.
"Break it?" Bellain asked, shocked.
"Yes, I have no wish for him to be in that kind of pain. If it
can only be remedied by breaking the bond then it must be done
quickly."
"No, Qui-Gon, I don't think that you understand. He'll be fine,
we can control his reaction now that we know it is there. We'll
have to introduce the bond slowly to him, as it should have
been naturally."
"Oh. What must be done?"
Bellain paused again. "That is not quite as easy as it sounds.
The only way to make sure that this is done correctly is to
slowly reintroduce him to Force contact, which means putting
him back on the medication."
Qui-Gon looked at him in surprise. "What do you mean? You told
me that extended exposure to those drugs leads to addiction."
"It does, but once the addiction is conquered, there are no
other long-term effects. We are caught here between two
difficult choices. I am simply looking at the alternative that
will cause the least long term problems. To wake him now
without the drugs is to expose him full force to the bond, and
you saw first hand that result. If the bond is broken, it could
send you both into a form of psychic shock that you may never
recover from. On this course, he will have to deal with a
slight addiction, but we will be prepared for that, and there
are ways to help him."
"The best choice this is." Yoda said, lending his support.
Qui-Gon was silent for a long moment, regarding the two.
Finally he turned his attention back to Obi-Wan. "If you think
it is best. I don't even see why you are discussing this with
me."
"You are effected by this as well Qui-Gon, bonds are not formed
by one person. This effects both of you."
Qui-Gon nodded his consent once again and Bellain moved off to
make the preparations.
Obi-Wan woke with only a memory of pain and a slightly muted
feeling to everything around him. Though he could feel the
Force, it was very faint. He thought he should be concerned
about this on some level, but it was difficult to gather the
strength to care. Everything was very distant and pleasently
warm.
His eyes slowly wandered around the room, recognizing it
immediately as the infirmary. He had spent enough time with the
Healers over the years that he thought the very smell of the
place was ingrained in his memory.
His former master was at his side, though Obi-Wan felt no
surprise at that. He could not remember a time the man had not
been with him at the healers if it was physically possible. At
the moment the older man was sleeping and Obi-Wan wondered
briefly how long he had been there. It couldn't have been too
long, or they would have made the Jedi master go to his own
quarters no matter what his condition.
He watched the still, sleeping face of the other man for a few
moments, simply cataloging the features he had grown to know so
well during is apprenticeship. Now that they were denied to him
most of the time, he enjoyed every moment he could manage in
the oterh man's presence. It was rare that they could spend any
time together, and it had been years since he had seen the face
of his master in the quiet repose of sleep when most of the
cares that normally weighed on him eased slightly.
Turning his attention away from Qui-Gon at last, he slowly took
stock of his condition. He could feel a very faint ache
throughout his body, but it was nothing terribly serious.
However, he could also sense the medication that was flowing
through his bloodstream, and was concerned that he was still
drugged. He vaguely remembered a Healer telling him that when
he woke again he would be mostly off the medication. Something
must have happened.
He tried to reach out to Qui-Gon through their mostly unused
training bond but found his grasp of the Force too weak to
allow it. Relaxing, he decided to wait for the other man to
wake, or for someone else to come in and explain what had
happened. Everything he could remember was mostly blurry and
disjointed.
"Obi-Wan?" He turned his eyes back to his master at the quiet
voice. The worry lines were back in full force and the concern
in the other man's eyes was unmistakable.
Obi-Wan smiled slightly in reassurance. "What happened?" His
words were hoarse and broken, but he knew the other man
understood.
"How much do you remember?" Qui-Gon asked as he leaned forward
and offered Obi- Wan water.
A few sips later, Obi-Wan felt much more capable of answering.
"Not much, everything is...fuzzy."
"That is probably a result of the medication more than anything
else. You will be able to come off it in a few days." The
darkening of Qui-Gon's expression told him that there was more
to that statement than he was trying to let on, but Obi-Wan let
it pass for the moment.
"After you left my apartment, you were attacked in your own. We
are still unable to discover by who or why, though we are
hoping that you may be able to give us some clues once you are
well. You had left you pack behind, and I was bringing it to
you when I felt a disturbance." he pause and when he spoke
again, his voice was tight. "I was not able to stop the
attack."
Obi-Wan closed his eyes briefly. The guilt his former master
was capable of retaining was unparalleled within the Jedi
order, and probably throughout the galaxy as well. "I am more
than sure that you did everything you could to help me, Master.
Please do not hold yourself accountable, unless of course you
were the one that hurt me." He smiled slightly.
Qui-Gon returned his smile, though his eyes were still shadowed
by worry.
"There's more, isn't there? I remember one of the Healers
telling me I would be off the medication when I woke again, but
I can feel it is still there."
"There were further complications." Qui-Gon spoke gently.
Obi-Wan sat in stunned silence looking at Qui-Gon to see of
the older man was joking. He closed his eyes trying to
concentrate, though it was very difficult and he could feel a
headache begin pounding behind his eyes.
"I know this is all overwhelming. The bond, I don't know what
to tell you Obi-Wan other than I think it would be best to
discuss it more when you are better. I'm sorry that this has
been forced upon you, but I will not apologize for saving your
life. As for the addiction, you are strong Obi-Wan, you always
have been. And I will be here to help you if you wish." The
older man's voice was strained and his blue eyes shadowed with
worry.
"I, I don't know what to think." Part of him, if he was honest
with himself, most of him was thrilled at the thought of a
deeper, more permanent connection to Qui-Gon, but a small
little section of his mind taunted him through a drug induced
distance. What if the bond allowed the other man to discover
his feelings. What if he was disgusted or worse, sympathetic?
He would always have a bond with the one man whose opinion
mattered most and who thought less of him for it.
And then, just for fun, there was the added pleasure of the
drugs and their effect on him. He was being told his healers
were willfully addicting him to a drug, and there was little to
be done about it. The whole concept was more than a little
disconcerting.
"You should rest, you are still not well." Qui-Gon reached out
to touch him, but pulled his hand back at the last moment. They
had been advised to avoid contact until the bond had settled.
"Oh, if I had a credit for every time I have heard that."
Obi-Wan smiled, retreating to humor as his best line of
defense.
"Jedi do not work for profit young Padawan." Qui-Gon raised his
eyebrows in mock rebuke, allowing the younger man to retreat.
"Well, maybe if we did, we would have had our own transport and
I wouldn't have spent the first five years of my apprenticeship
catching rides with you to our next assignment. Or maybe that
was just because you handled the last ship they gave you so
poorly." Obi-Wan looked up at him innocently.
"How did you find out about that?" The older man looked
genuinely curious.
Obi-Wan yawned before replying, the heavy pull of sleep again
tugging at him. "Mace was always happy to regale me with your
misadventures when I was your Padawan. He said it would keep
you honest."
"Remind me to thank him the next time I see him."
Obi-Wan nodded slightly, and allowed himself to be pulled into
a welcoming darkness.
Obi-Wan looked up as Mace Windu entered his private room in the
infirmary. He was sitting up on the sterile white bed
attempting to read. Qui-Gon was seated at his side, unable and
unwilling to be any distance from the younger man. He was
slowly coming off the medication and allowing the bond to
settle in more naturally, though the reduced drug dosage and
the strengthening bond left him feeling edgy and nervous, as
though something were sitting just in the corner of his vision
that would move every time he tried to catch sight of it. He
knew it would only grow worse as the days wore on.
"Knight Kenobi, I trust you are feeling better?" Mace began, a
formal tone coloring his voice.
"Better is a relative term, Councilor. I am right in assuming
by the official tone that this is an official visit?" Obi-Wan
really didn't want to get into the specifics with of his
physical condition with anyone just at the moment, thinking
about it always brought the discomfort to the forefront of his
attention.
Mace looked at Qui-Gon who was sitting silently, trying to give
Obi-Wan privacy should it be needed without him actually
leaving the room. "He does your training credit, Qui- Gon."
"By picking up on the obvious? Hardly. My master taught me far
more valuable lessons than that one." Obi-Wan responded before
his former master could. "You had a concern?"
Mace nodded. "The Council is looking into your attack, and now
that you are more capable of responding to our questions, I was
hoping we could speak of the incident. Anything you can
remember and tell us would be of great help."
Obi-Wan leaned back against the cushions and closed his eyes
briefly, centering his thoughts and his memories. "I, I'm
having a hard time remembering the events clearly. The Healers
can't tell me if it's temporary or if it'll fade with the
medication. They don't know if it is a result of the injuries I
received or the prolonged exposure the drug. In any event,
there is very little that I can tell you."
Mace nodded. "We understand, anything you can tell us will
help."
"I returned to my rooms, entered and was struck by...something?
I don't know, it's hard to explain and not very clear in my own
mind. Something happened and I was cut off from the Force, of
that much I am sure. It was so surprising that I could not help
but remember that. And it hurt. Other than that, I just don't
know. Everything is blurry and hard to understand. Someone was
in my room waiting for me, I think I may have seen whoever it
was, but I really can't say for sure. I know that right now I
don't remember a face." He shook his head and closed his eyes,
finding that even recalling his few memories was tiring.
Mace nodded, his usually stern face sympathetic. "I think that
will at least give us something to work with Obi-Wan. We are
doing everything we can to find out why this happened." He
paused and considered the younger man for a moment. "Perhaps it
would be best if you rested now. Qui-Gon, could I speak with
you for a moment?"
Obi-Wan nodded. He knew he was being brushed aside, but was
suddenly too tired to really care. It was also a comfort to
know that if it were important Qui-Gon would either tell him,
or he would be able to get it out of his former master. "Don't
go far." He instructed Qui-Gon before closing his eyes and
letting sleep take him.
"How is he doing really?" Mace asked as they moved away from
the sleeping Jedi.
Qui-Gon rubbed absently at his temples. "He is mostly recovered
from the injuries, though they still pain him. The bacta did
its job. The other things, though, that is what wears on him."
"And in typical Qui-Gon Jinn fashion you blame yourself." He
held up a hand to forestall the oncoming argument. "You saved
his life, yes it is difficult right now, but he will recover.
It's only temporary."
Qui-Gon didn't really feel much like arguing the point, so he
changed the subject. "What has the Council been able to find."
Mace looked as though he would press the point, but answered
him instead. "We had Obi- Wan's apartments swept, trying to
find some evidence of the attacker, but it came up clear. It
looks as though the only person who has ever been in that
apartment is Obi-Wan. Except of course for the missing window,
and the obvious damage to Obi-Wan. Whoever did this knew
exactly how to manipulate the evidence. We've checked the
records for all Temple visitors over the past month who were
here at the time of the attack, and we are begining interviews
this afternoon." Mace looked past Qui-Gon's shoulder to the
Obi- Wan. "I'd really hoped that he'd have remembered more."
"He may still, though the healers don't think it's likely. Why
would something like this happen Mace? Here in he Temple we're
supposed to be safe. It's the one place we all look to for
order and a sense of normalcy. I fear we have become too
complacent." His frustration showed clearly in his voice.
"There is another possibility we're considering, though it's
something we don't want to believe. What I say here cannot
leave this room." He waited for Qui-Gon nod of confirmation.
"There is the possibility that the attack was carried out by
someone within the Order itself. To come into the Temple and
attack one of our own within the walls seems to be a little
farfetched at this point. It makes more sense if it was carried
out by another Jedi. Obi-Wan is an impressive fighter, even
caught by surprise do you find it likely he would have been
overcome by a normal attacker?" Mace's voice was hushed,
pitched to carry only as far as Qui-Gon's ears.
Qui-Gon drew a breath. While he was not entirely surprised by
Mace's words, to hear them spoken aloud as a concern and
consideration of the other Council members was disturbing. He
himself had considered the possibility, though not too
seriously. It was one thing to fight darkness in the galaxy on
other planets, but within their own Order? It confirmed his own
thoughts that they had grown far too complacent in their
security. "What precautions are being taken to ensure his
safety?"
"Other than your own constant presence? You may not have
noticed, having been understandably preoccupied, but this area
is restricted, only myself and Yoda are allowed here, other
than Healer Bellain. Once he is moved out of the infirmary,
someone will be in the area at all times. We've kept this as
quiet as possible, even his condition isn't widely known,
hopefully we can convince whoever did this that there is no
need to try again."
Qui-Gon nodded. "It will do. For now."
"How are you feeling today, Obi-Wan?" Bellain took a moment in
his examination to pause and look Obi-Wan in the eye.
"Fine." His answer was short and clipped as though it cost him
dearly to say it. In a way it did. He was tired, he never slept
well in the infirmary. In addition, there was a constant
buzzing quality to the bond he had with his master that made
him want to scream and to top things of nicely, just as a
special torture, he was beginning to go into a more pronounced
state of withdrawal. It made him more than a little on edge and
he thought his teeth might crack from being clenched so
tightly.
Bellain gave him a sympathetic look that made Obi-Wan want to
do some very un-Jedi like things to the Healer. "Your healing
is coming along nicely, if it weren't for the other
circumstances, I would seriously consider releasing you."
Obi-Wan smiled shortly at the incarnation of evil. "Thank you,
that makes me feel so much better. Why can't I leave? Can't I
go through this in my own room just as miserably as I can deal
with it here?"
"You could, but I would feel better if we can monitor you,
make sure there are no other problems that creep up. You do
tend to attract trouble you know."
"Yes, well I learned from the best." He shot a quick glance at
the Jedi Master who was sitting passively observing the
examination. It was not friendly.
Bellain continued as though nothing were wrong. "On a better
note, your bond seems to be progressing nicely, if you feel up
to it I would like you to try something."
Obi-Wan took a deep breath releasing the agitation he was
feeling the best be could and tried to focus on the Healer.
"What do you want to do?" He asked warily.
"I think it should be all right for you and Qui-Gon to be in
contact again. At this stage, it shouldn't hurt you and it may
even help." He looked between Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, seeking
their opinion and consent.
"I won't do anything that will hurt him." Qui-Gon's voice was
quiet but adamant. "I will not."
"I would have to agree with that. Strangely, I don't feel much
like being in pain for some reason." Obi-Wan slid his eyes from
his former master's feature to the Healer. Privately he both
dreaded and desired the renewal of physical contact with the
older man. Though he had rarely seen him in the past two years,
whenever he was in Qui-Gon's presence there was always at least
a small amount of contact between them. When he had been a
padawan, he had been closer to no one else in the universe.
Bellain nodded. "I understand your concerns. However, I have
spoken with others on this matter and we are in agreement,
physical contact will not hurt either of you. It may even speed
the time it is taking for the bond to settle and help in your
elimination of the medication from your system. I would just
like you to try."
The two looked at each other for a long moment, it was almost
as though Bellain weren't even in the room with them. Finally,
Obi-Wan nodded. "If it can't hurt..."
Qui-Gon echoed his nod and stood from the chair that had been
placed at the foot of Obi- Wan's bed. Qui-GOn had positioned it
there to give Obi-Wan the greatest amount of privacy without
moving into a painful range of separation. Slowly, almost
hesitantly, Qui- Gon reached out as he neared and brushed his
fingers lightly along Obi-Wan's face.
The touch was electric. Obi-Wan felt as though every nerve in
his body had suddenly sprung to life after an indefinite period
of dormancy. While it was not painful, it was not entirely
comfortable either. His eyes snapped up to the other man's
eyes, impossibly blue, and he thought he saw something flicker
in their depths. It was gone before he could recognize it,
though.
Apparently sensing his discomfort, Qui-Gon slowly pulled his
fingers back. The sudden loss of contact left Obi-Wan with an
empty, hollow feeling and something much more akin to pain. He
reached out swiftly and grabbed the retreating fingers.
Immediately, the sensation eased. Obi-Wan drew an unsteady
breath, running his fingers absently along the strong calloused
ones of his former master. For his part, Qui-Gon did not seem
inclined to try to remove his hand from the grasp.
"Problems?" Bellain asked curiously.
Obi-Wan laid back against the cushions of the bed, suddenly too
tired to deal with any more questions. He knew Qui-Gon could
explain as well as he could. The slight squeeze of his fingers
told him that the other man knew and would take care of it.
"Apparently there is not problem with contact now, unless of
course we try to break that contact. A little warning would
have been nice." Even with his eyes closed, he knew the
expression the other man wore. It had intimidated far more
powerful men than the Healer standing before them. Strangely,
he had never found it all that intimidating. He knew the man
behind the face, though so maybe it wasn't strange after all.
"Oh." Bellain sounded genuinely startled. "We, we hadn't
considered that, though thinking on it now makes perfect sense.
We were so preoccupied with the initial touch we never
considered anything beyond that." There was a scraping sound
along the floor and Obi-Wan opened his eyes to see the Healer
dragging the chair from the foot of the bed to the head. "You
may want this, you will probably be here for a while."
Obi-Wan took a shaky breath, raising an unsteady hand to his
face, as though he could wipe way the unpleasant feeling
sweeping through his body with such a simple gesture. He tried
every calming technique he new and still he felt as though he
were being ripped apart from the inside.
He felt as wave of calm sweep over him and glanced at his
former master who was sitting by his side. He grimaced
apologetically as he eased his hold of the other man's hand
which he'd been gripping as the discomfort increased. Only the
presence of the older Jedi had made the entire process less
miserable. Qui-Gon had been an island of calm and support,
something Obi-Wan remembered well from his days as Padawan.
The intense withdrawal symptoms had begun the day before, and
even though he knew what to expect, the process was still
difficult. He ached everywhere and he was running a low fever.
The pounding in his head had continued without respite for
longer than he cared to remember and cramps ripped through his
stomach at excitingly unpredictable intervals. Qui-Gon had sat
at his side through it all, a hand on him at all times, as any
distance between them increased the young Knight's pain. The
older man had said nothing which would have increased Obi-Wan's
embarrassment of the entire situation, for which he was
infinitely grateful.
As the wave of pain passed for the moment, Obi-Wan leaned back
in his bed and closed his eyes. He had not been able to sleep
much in the past few days and he was far beyond the point of
exhaustion. Every time he was on the verge of sleep, the pain
would come to him again and wake him. It was a never-ending
cycle and he was beginning to lose a sense of real time. Even
attempts to Force induce him into sleep had been unsuccessful,
much to the chagrin of his former Master.
A gentle hand caressed his forehead and Obi-Wan opened his
eyes. Qui-Gon stared down at him in great concern and spoke
softly. "Would you like some water? I think it would be good
for you." The older man offered a glass for him to drink.
Obi-Wan took a few sips before his stomach reminded him what
had happened the last time he had thought he could pretend
everything was normal. Qui-Gon removed the glass and continued
to stoke his hair in a soothing manner.
"It is nearly finished now, Obi-Wan. You'll feel better soon."
Qui-Gon said softly in a soothing voice. It was a tone the
other Jedi had seemed to perfect ovre the years and it never
ceased to give him at least some measure of calm. The older man
had been offering encouragement at every opportunity.
Obi-Wan nodded and closed his eyes. He was very tired, but knew
that he would not be able to sleep. All he really wanted at
this point was to sleep in a real bed, in a place where he
could turn the lights off completely instead of existing in
this perpetual twilight. He wanted just a few moments
completely to himself where his every move was not monitored by
some overactive Healer.
"I hope you take this lesson to heart young Padawan. You should
know better than to try recreational drugs." His former
Master's voice held a smile in the tone and Obi-Wan could not
help but smile in return as he remembered the conversation the
two of them had had all those years ago about proper Jedi
behavior and the many types of drugs that would be available on
the planets they visited.
"I'm sorry, Master. I didn't think that it would hurt to try it
just once." He tried to sound both young and contrite and was
surprised at how easily he fell into the role.
Qui-Gon laughed. When Obi-Wan opened his eyes, the older man
was regarding him seriously, sympathy evident in his eyes. "How
do you feel, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan simply nodded, not really wanting to either lie to the
man nor tell him exactly how he was feeling.
Qui-Gon nodded in return, though Obi-Wan knew that the other
man was aware of exactly what was going on. He hadn't been the
Order's most sought after diplomat because of his good looks,
though that had helped as well. Qui-Gon opened his mouth to
speak, then closed it, looking suddenly uncertain.
"Obi-Wan, we, I think that," He paused. "We need to discuss
what is going to happen when you are well and the Healers are
ready to release you."
Obi-Wan looked at him for a moment in confusion, and then his
eyes fell on his own hand held loosely in those of his former
Master. "Oh. I guess splitting the two of us up is out of the
question for a little while." He said after a moment, meeting
Qui-Gon's eyes.
The other man simply nodded. "You know there is your old room
in my apartments. It isn't really fitting for a Knight. And I
know you are used to your privacy after the last two years. We
could put in for a transfer to another set of apartments
somewhere with more appropriate rooms, but that will take
time." Qui-Gon's voice was soft, and Obi-Wan was almost sure
that he could detect a note of uncertainty in his voice.
"Mmmm. My apartment isn't going to help any. It has only the
one room and the living area. You know, I lived in that room
for a long time, I would like, I wouldn't be opposed to moving
back in. Until this settles between us, that is. I am sure you
have become accustomed to your own privacy as well." He added
hastily at the end, not wanting the other to think he was too
eager to return to his old room.
A brief smile flashed across Qui-Gon's face, a smile which the
other man rarely gave. Obi- Wan felt himself smile in return,
without conscious thought. "I would like that very much,
Obi-Wan."
"You will not engage in any physical activity for another week,
after which you will come back here and we will examine you
again. If I clear you, then you can begin your training agian,
but only at low levels. When you are tired, rest. Don't be a
martyr. If you feel ill, call us or come here. This is very
important Knight Kenobi, you were very seriously injured and
your body has been placed under enormous stress." Bellain
looked at him seriously. "You will not be cleared for a return
to active field duty for some time, I suggest you look into
some classes for the children you find interesting, because
that is all you will be able to do."
Qui-Gon watched at Obi-Wan nodded carefully. The younger man
was still having moments of discomfort due to withdrawal, but
it wasn't at a point which required constant monitoring. It was
the opinion of all involved that Obi-Wan would heal better away
from the constant activity of the infirmary.
Bellain examined him closely for a moment before nodding. "All
right, go. Try to be careful." The Healer smiled and shook his
head before turning to check on some of his other patients.
"You'd think I'd never been injured before. I thought I'd never
be able to leave this place. I swear Bellain likes to hang on
to his patients." Obi-Wan grumbled as he readied himself to
leave. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stood on
his own for the first time in far too long.
Qui-Gon tightened his grip of the younger man's elbow as he
swayed slightly and he closed his eyes. "Obi-Wan?" he asked
softly.
"I'll be fine. I just need a moment. It's been a while since I
have stood." They stood together in silence with Obi-Wan's hand
pressed tightly against his closed eyes. Several long moments
later, the graceful hand fell away and clear blue eyes regarded
his own with conviction. "We can go now."
They walked slowly through the halls of the Temple. Qui-Gon
could remember more than one occasion in which either he or his
Padawan had had to take this pace back to their rooms due to
some injury or illness. It seemed sometimes as though his life
was more a string of dangerous close calls linked by brief
moments of respite rather than anything else.
Obi-Wan stopped several times along the way. He would raise a
weak hand and offer an embarresed smile. Though the younger man
said nothing, Qui-Gon knew how much the process was tiring him
and how frustrating he found not being able to move at his
natural speed. Qui-Gon offered what support he could without
making Obi-Wan feel any more embarrassment. When they finally
reached his apartment, Obi-Wan's colorhad washed out to the
sickly pale which had plauged him during his first days in the
infirmary and he was trembling faintly.
"Obi-Wan?" he asked in concern. "Do you need to go back to the
Healers?" He would carry the other man there himself if he had
to.
"No, no. I just think I over did it a little. I'll be fine once
I rest." Obi-Wan brushed off his concern, though Qui-Gon could
feel the pain the other man trying to cope with. In some ways
the new bond was much like their training bond, he could feel
Obi-Wan's mental and physical state and he could influence htem
slightly with a thought. Gently sending a wave of healing Force
to Obi-Wan Qui-Gon steered the younger man to his old room.
Obi-Wan smiled gratefully as he sat on the edge of his bed.
"This is nice." he said with a sigh as he laid back in the bed.
"No Healers, no weird smells, no awful lights." His eyes were
heavy and it was obvious that he would be asleep in moments.
Qui-Gon brushed a hand across the much-loved forehead. "Sleep
now, Obi-Wan. Heal."
Obi-Wan woke with a start. He held himself still for a moment
trying to pinpoint exactly what was wrong when he noticed it
was nothing external that had caused his alarm. He turned his
focus inward, trying to determine exactly what had disturbed
him. Sleep still clinging to him, it took Obi-Wan a few seconds
to pinpoint the source of his worry.
Qui-Gon was gone.
As soon as he mentally recognized the problem, the alarm he had
been feeling suddenly turned to pain. Each breath without the
other man in sight, without his touch was an agony. His skin
ached for Qui-Gon's touch, his mind reached out for the man who
should have been close at hand.
Obi-Wan lurched unsteadily from the bed and headed for the
door. As soon as the door hissed open he called for the other
man, unable to keep the desperation from his voice. He knew,
distantly, he was being irrational but the compulsion he felt
to find the other man drove him mercilessly.
"Qui-Gon!" he called again, receiving no answer from his first
call. He stumbled to the door of his former master's bedroom,
hoping the man would be there. Hoping he would be in the
apartment. Despite the drive, Obi-Wan did not think he would be
able to walk much further.
The door to the room opened and Qui-Gon came out quickly. His
hair was loose and disheveled from sleep and he was wearing
only his sleeping pants. Despite obviously being woken from
sleep, he was still alert and he rushed to Obi-Wan's side.
As soon as the older man placed his hands on Obi-Wan's
shoulders the compulsion within him eased. As did the
adrenaline that kept him moving. His knees buckled and he
started to fall, only to be caught in the strong, protective
arms of his former master.
"Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked, concern blanketing his voice as he
guided Obi-Wan to one of the couches.
Obi-Wan sat speechless for a moment, simply basking in the
presence of the other man, and soaking his touch into his skin.
He shook his head after a few moments as though to clear his
thoughts.
"If you needed something, Obi-Wan, all you had to do was call
me." Qui-Gon said with no little concern. "It is too soon for
you to be up like this."
Obi-Wan shook his head. "No, I mean, yes I agree with you, but
that isn't why I was up. I woke and, and... " he paused it
suddenly sounded so childish. "You weren't there." He sighed
and laid his head on the back of the couch. "I felt...I needed,
it was." Obi-Wan would have gestured with his hands had he
energy. "I had to find you."
Qui-Gon pulled Obi-Wan's closest hand into both of his own.
"Oh, Obi-Wan, I'm so sorry. I didn't think. I've been ahead of
you in the progression of the bond the entire time. I just
assumed that because I could be away from you for a time that
you would be fine. I am so sorry. Did you hurt yourself? Do you
need a Healer?"
Obi-Wan turned his head and was suddenly confronted with two
very blue, very concerned eyes. He felt himself shaking his
head though most of his attention was fixed on the face of his
master. "I just feel, a little light headed." It wasn't a lie
exactly, though the reason he felt that way was entirely a
result of the close proximity of the other man.
Qui-Gon kept his hand covered and Obi-Wan made no move to pull
away, in fact he was hard pressed not to give into the urge to
move closer, to take up permanent residence in the older man's
pocket. The two sat in silence for a few moments as Obi-Wan's
breathing steadied and Qui-Gon's concern faded. Slowly, the
peace of the moment and the demands of his healing body soaked
into Obi-Wan's body and he found himself barely able to keep
his eyes open, no matter how close the other man was to him.
"Do you think you could sleep more?" Qui-Gon asked quietly, his
voice low and gentle as he used a tone Obi-Wan knew from years
of injury and illness.
Merely nodding, Obi-Wan found speech suddenly was too much of
an effort. He watched Qui-Gon in a slight daze as the other man
slipped a hand around his shoulder and pulled him carefully
from the couch and began steering his steps. He was so near
sleep it wasn't until he was nearly laying down that he
realized he was not in his own room. He looked at Qui-Gon,
hoping the question was clear in his eyes. However, the other
man said nothing. He simply laid Obi-Wan down carefully in his
large bed and slipped in after him. It was a credit to his
exhausted state that he was able to fall asleep at all.
Qui-Gon stared at the familiar ceiling of his apartment in an
entirely unfamiliar position. Despite his own weariness, he had
been unable to sleep. It was mostly the direct result that once
his former Padawan had succumbed to sleep, he had curled his
body around Qui- Gon's quite comfortably. He held Obi-Wan
carefully for a time and tried to tell himself this had been
the best solution for both of them. Eventually, though he'd
eneded up running his hands through Obi-Wan's hair and thinking
about what an awful person he was.
He couldn't help but feel as though he had been taking
advantage of the situation. He had seen the question in
Obi-Wan's eyes as he led the younger man into his room, but he
had chosen to ignore it. Qui-Gon hoped his former apprentice
would be able to forgive him, it wasn't as though he were going
to ravish him while he slept. It was harmless. Really.
Sighing for perhaps the hundredth time Qui-Gon closed his eyes.
While he had been very tired and Obi-Wan had woken him from a
much needed rest, Qui-Gon knew he would not be able to sleep.
Instead of trying, he dropped into a light meditation hoping he
could fool his own mind into believing he was calm enough to
sleep. He didn't really expect it to work as he'd tried four
times already but it was either that or continue running his
hands through Obi-Wan's hair. He liked its new cut and without
the Padawan braid.
Just as he managed to clear his mind enough to meditate,
Obi-Wan murmured something in his sleep and shifted slightly.
The younger man's head was already resting on his chest, and he
turned his face into him slightly. One long fingered hand
twitched absently in sleep where it lay across Qui-Gon stomach,
and the Jedi Master resisted the urge to pick it up and bring
the fingers to his lips. Instead he closed his eyes again to
block out the images, though one hand continued to stroke the
soft golden hair.
Again, he neared a meditation state when Obi-Wan moved, this
the movement was more pronounced. When he glanced at Obi-Wan's
face, Qui-Gon saw the usually smooth brow furrowed with lines
of worry. Qui-Gon murmured words absently to the other man and
ran a hand down Obi-Wan's back, but he did not calm. Reaching
out with the Force to send waves of calm to the other man
Qui-Gon was brought up short when Obi-Wan jerked into full
wakefulness, a cry on his lips.
The Knight looked about the room wildly for a moment and
Qui-Gon kept still allowing the other man to adjust. Despite
returning awareness, Obi-Wan still seemed confused and wary
making Qui-Gon immediately regret his selfish decision to bring
Obi-Wan into his room. The younger man needed to be in a place
he knew, not with Qui-Gon. "Obi- Wan." He spoke the word as the
beginning of an apology but with his voice, the younger man's
confusion cleared. He looked around the room with clear eyes,
then heaved a sigh and relaxed back into the same position in
which he had been asleep.
Qui-Gon did not move for several long seconds, wondering if
Obi-Wan understood where he was. "Obi-Wan?" he asked softly,
his voice slightly hesitant.
"Yes?" he responded, weariness etching his tone.
"Are you all right?" He supposed he could check with the Force,
but he thought a verbal answer would be better.
"I think so, I just had a dream. It was so strange." He paused,
but did not move. "I was in a room, I think it was mine. But
I'm so rarely there it was hard to tell, though. Someone was
there, I knew him but didn't. He spoke to me, I think he was
sorry but I don't know what about." Qui-Gon could tell Obi-Wan
was sliding toward sleep once again, but the words had
triggered his attention.
"Obi-Wan, I know you are tired, but is there anything else you
can remember? Anything at all?" He kept his voice calm as he
didn't want to alarm his former padawan.
"I, I don't think so. It is very blurry, hard to remember." He
stopped speaking and was silent for so long, Qui-Gon thought he
had fallen asleep when he spoke again. "You were there, I
think. You were trying to help me, but you couldn't get to me."
Qui-Gon tightened his arms around the other man reflexively. It
sounded as though a part of Obi-Wan at least could remember the
events of his attack. The images were vague and highly open to
interpretation, but still it was better than they had had
before. Better than they had expected after the trauma of the
injury and chemical withdrawal, in any case.
Qui-Gon looked up at the ceiling of his bedroom again, though
his time his thoughts were not focused on his current position.
He was instead running over Obi-Wan's words in his mind. The
fact that the attacker had spoken with Obi-Wan and that he had
apologized said some very important things about the entire
incident. Whoever the person had been had obviously known
Obi-Wan and was not after him solely for the purpose of hurting
him. If the dream could be trusted it meant that Obi-Wan knew
something important, somehting dangerous and more than likely
whoever had tried to kill him would try again.
"I don't know if that's going to be enough." Qui-Gon said with
some heat. He sat across from Mace at the small table in his
kitchen while they discussed the revelation of Obi- Wan's
dream.
"I know you're concerned Qui-Gon, we all are. However, I can't
authorize something like this on the basis of a half remembered
dream. We're not trying to make things unsafe for him, but we
cannot lock down the entire Temple. There is no reason to
believe that whoever did this is still in the Temple and to do
what you suggest...Qui-Gon it could harm the Order as a whole.
If we don't want to create a widespread panic. We can't do it.
I know you want this person caught, we all do." Mace shook his
head. "We have some larger problem at the moment. We've tried
to keep the whole thing as quiet as we could, but I'm afraid
most of the Temple knows what happened and that Knight Kenobi
is fine. If it wasn't an isolated incident, well you know the
attempt could be made again."
"All the more reason to provide him with more security. He
nearly died Mace. If I'd been one minute later...this would be
quite a different investigation."
"You are here with him aren't you?" Mace asked raising an
eyebrow.
"Yes, but one Jedi against another Jedi, those aren't odds that
I would like to play with his life. That is what we are talking
about here Mace, Obi-Wan's life. We nearly lost him once
already, I can't have that again." He drew a breath and calmed
himself. "He is too important to loose."
Mace watched him closely, then his eyes flickered to Qui-Gon's
bedroom. The door was still closed where Obi-Wan slept within.
Qui-Gon could see the question in his friend's eyes but he
refused to acknowledge anything. Instead he stood.
"I have to check on Obi-Wan." He said shortly. He had been
paying very close attention to their bond since he had left the
bed earlier that morning to meet with Mace. He did not want to
wake the younger man before he was ready, nor did he want to
have the conversation with the other Council member in his
bedroom. Instead he had settled for returning frequently to
reconnect the bond with Obi-Wan; it was the best way to keep
the strain from reaching his former Padawan in his sleep.
He walked quickly across the room and entered the bedroom.
Obi-Wan was still sleeping, lying face down on the mattress
with his head turned toward the door. He could see the faint
lines of stress at the corners of his eyes where the pull of
the bond was beginning to assert itself. He sat carefully on
the edge of the bed and lightly ran his hand along the back of
the younger man. He had found that physical contact was the
best way to relieve any stress that had been induced by their
link, though he admitted to himself that probably would have
done it anyway.
He closed his eyes briefly, he would never wish the pain this
man had gone through on anyone and yet it had been endured by
the one closest to his heart. He hated seeing Obi- Wan suffer
and would have gladly taken the burden on himself if it had
been possible. The younger man rarely admited to his pain, but
Qui-Gon had grown adept at recognizing the signs of it over the
years and he knew the entire ordeal had been very hard on
Obi-Wan. It made his heart ache.
He brushed his fingers through Obi-Wan's short golden hair
lovingly. He had always loved Obi-Wan's hair particularly the
way it shone red in the sunlight. Opening his eyes he looked at
the still face that was now once again peaceful, though he knew
Obi-Wan was closer to consciousness.
After a moment, blue-grey eyes flickered open. The younger man
offered him a sleepy smile, though he did not move from
Qui-Gon's touch. "Morning." He said, his voice slightly cracked
from sleep.
"Good morning Obi-Wan. Did you sleep well?" Qui-Gon asked,
still running his hand through Obi-Wan's hair. It seemed as
though he could not make himself stop.
"Much better once I was in here." He said absently. A startled
looked flashed briefly across Obi-Wan's face and he laughed
weakly. "I-" he began but Qui-Gon cut him off.
"It's all right Obi-Wan, I understand. Bonds between Jedi can
be powerful things." He smiled, though inside his thoughts were
racing. Maybe Obi-Wan would be opposed to, but it was pointless
ot think about it now. "If you want to get cleaned up, Mace is
here and he wants to talk with you as soon as you're ready."
Obi-Wan nodded and sat up slowly, rubbing an eye with the heel
of his hand. "Tell him I'll be out shortly."
Qui-Gon stood and watched as Obi-Wan stood carefully, obviously
still hurting from his injuries, and make his way with great
care across the room to the 'fresher unit. It pained him to see
the young man have to move with such care lest he cause himself
more pain. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and returned
to the main room to continue his conversation with Mace. Maybe
he would be able to distract himself enough so that he wouldn't
think of Obi-Wan in the 'fresher.
"And you can't remember more than that?" Mace asked finally
after he had listened to Obi-Wan's first hand account of the
dream.
Obi-Wan sat back and a thoughtful look crossed his face.
Qui-Gon resisted the urge to close the space between them and
pull the other man close to himself. Instead he rested on the
arm of the couch as close to his former apprentice as he could
and watched for signs of undue stress in the younger man's
features.
"I'm sorry I can't tell you more. It just isn't clear and all
the techniques which normally work to clear these types of
dreams don't seem to be doing anything."
Mace nodded and stood. "Very well, Knight. I assure you we are
doing everything in our power to reach closure in this matter.
Please contact one of us if you remember anything else." His
old friend pass by them on his way to the door and rested his
hand for a moment on Obi-Wan's shoulder before leaving the
apartment.
Obi-Wan looked up at him, a slight grin on his face. "Was that
an official display of concern, or a personal one?"
Qui-Gon echoed the young man's expression. "I think an official
one may have been more of a display. You worried many people."
Obi-Wan stared at him for a long moment, his face turning
slowly serious. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry you."
Qui-Gon sighed and rested his hand finally on Obi-Wan's should,
close to his neck. "Yes, I hold you personally responsible for
your attack. Please try and keep yourself out of the target
range while in the safety of the Temple from now on." He shook
his head. "Don't apologize for things that are out of your
control."
Obi-Wan opened his mouth to argue the point, he knew his
padawan well, but a yawn cut him off and Qui-Gon jumped at his
chance. "You should be resting. You're still not recovered and
you'll do yourself no good by arguing with me." He added
slightly more pressure to his touch until Obi-Wan was lying on
the couch.
Moving quickly, Qui-Gon went into the bedroom and pulled one of
the blankets from the bed and a datapad from his table before
returning to the other room. He drew the blanket up over
Obi-wan ignoring the pointed look from the younger man and
settled onto a comfortable spot on the floor in front of the
couch near Obi-Wan's head.
He looked at the younger man over his shoulder, their faces
nearly level. "You should sleep. I'll be right here if you need
anything."
Obi-Wan looked as though he would argue for a moment before
nodding and settling more comfortably into the cushions of the
couch. Qui-Gon turned back to his datapad and called up an
article he had been reading as he rested his back against the
furniture. The touch, when it came was so light and hesitant he
nearly jumped as Obi-Wan's fingers brushed the skin at the back
of his neck through his hair. Almost immediately however, he
relaxed into the touch and pressed more firmly against
Obi-Wan's fingers letting him know through touch the contact
was welcomed.
Obi-Wan paced the length of the room for what seemed the
hundreth time. He stopped briefly by the large window to look
out at the cityscape of Coruscant and could not help but glare
at the ships flying in the distance through the open skyways of
the city. Spinning away from the window in disgust, he had to
stop and place a steadying hand on the nearest wall as the room
continued to spin without him.
"Would you like to sit, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked innocently from
across the room. Despite the minimal distance between then, it
was the farthest space they had managed for days. Even the few
feet was enough to set Obi-Wan on edge.
"No, I don't want to sit. I want to take a walk. I don't want
to be in here anymore." He knew he was being childish, but
after more days of inactivity and enforced enclosure than he
cared to remember, it was hard to make himself care. So much
for Jedi control; he'd learned from the best after all.
"Okay. Take a walk." Qui-Gon stood and motioned grandly towards
the door.
"Don't patronize me. Don't accommodate me. I'm tired of
everyone treating me as if I were going to break. I am fine. I
think if I want to take a walk I should be able to." He crossed
his arms and stood his ground.
Qui-Gon nodded. "I don't see a problem with that. I mean, it
isn't as though the last time you went off by yourself in the
Temple anything untoward happened. I'm certain that whoever
managed to injure you the first time has quite learned his
lesson and will not make a second attempt. Feel free." His
voice was even, but Obi-Wan could hear the sharpness of the
words.
Obi-Wan stared at his former master for several moments before
he blew out a breath. Shaking his head, he closed the short
distance between them and took Qui-Gon's hand. "Maybe you could
come with me?"
Qui-Gon's features relaxed and a slight smile curved his lips.
"I think we could arrange that. I'll have to make some calls
first, let a few people know where we will be. I won't take any
more chances with your life when a few moments preparation
could keep you safe."
Obi-Wan nodded and perched on the edge of the couch. As he
watched Qui-Gon walk across the room to retrieve the comlink he
was unable to keep his leg from bouncing in a very unJedilike
display of anxiousness. In distinct opposition to his own
agitiation, Qui- Gon stood in perfect stillness as he contacted
several individuals within the Temple to ensure their safety.
Within moments, Qui-Gon was standing before him again and
extended a hand.
"Ready?" He asked mildly.
Obi-Wan barely resisted the urge to jump up from his seat,
instead taking the offered hand he stood slowly. He noted with
great relief the distinct lack of dizziness and flashed a smile
at his former master. "Thank you." He tried to convey all the
meaning the single word could as he looked up into Qui-Gon's
clear blue eyes. He knew he had been less than an optimal
companion over the past few days, and it had taken great
patience on the part of Qui-Gon to put up with him.
Qui-Gon gripped his hand tighter and smiled in return, his
entire face lighting up with the action and the strong planes
of his face softening. "With pleasure. Where would you like to
go?"
Obi-Wan considered for a moment. "One of the Gardens would be
nice, I think. I'd like to see some sort of life outside that
sad little plant you insist is still living." He pointed to the
potted plant in the corner. It had been in the apartment for
more years than Obi-Wan could remember and it had never fared
very well despite their combined best efforts.
"Perhaps the one on the upper level of the north tower. You've
always liked that one." Qui-Gon turned to the door and led
Obi-Wan into the hall, never relinquishing his hold on his
hand.
"That would be nice." Obi-Wan curbed a smile that twitched at
the corners of his mouth. His former master had been far more
affectionate over the past several days than Obi-Wan had ever
seen him. He'd thought a great deal about what that might mean,
thought he wasn't entirely sure that Qui-Gon recognized the
change that was taking place in their relationship.
They walked through the halls of the Temple in companionable
silence. Obi-Wan simply enjoyed the feeling of being outside
their apartment for some other purpose than meeting with a
Healer. And of course, he greatly enjoyed the companionship of
the other man, though that had been the one constant he had
been able to count on since his attack. He hadn't realized, or
maybe he hadn't allowed himself to realize, how much he missed
spending time with Qui-Gon over the past several years.
As the two entered the enclosed space in the tower, Obi-Wan
slowed his pace and gazed around the greenery of the Garden. He
closed his eyes and breathed in deeply the scents of the life.
"It's been almost three years since I've managed to make it
back here. Before, um, Naboo, well, we'd been so busy. I think
we may have been in the Temple a total of maybe three weeks the
whole year, and the past two years...well, you know how that
turned out." He spoke quietly, as though to speak too loudly
would be to profane the place.
"Would you like to sit?" Qui-Gon asked softly, standing close
at his shoulder.
Obi-Wan nodded absently and let himself be led by his former
master. It had been far too long since he had been in a place
as peaceful and full of life. He could feel the Force nearly
singing around him and it filled him in a way he could not
describe. It was times that this that he mourned most for those
who had no connection to the Force. He thought it was
profoundly sad that they would never see the world as he did,
expereicne this as he and others like him could.
Qui-Gon finally picked a spot deep in the secluded garden well
away from the main paths where they would be able to sit in
silence and peace. As Obi-Wan sank to the ground and rested
against the tree at his back he leaned into Qui-Gon's shoulder.
The older man smiled at him gently and pulled his hand up and
held it.
"Thank you," Obi-Wan said finally as he settled into a sense of
the Garden not founded on awe.
"You're welcome," Qui-Gon said tightening his hold on Obi-Wan's
hand in response.
They sat in silence for several long moments. Obi-Wan was at
peace both as a result of his surroundings and his company.
Despite the circumstances, he was extremely happy that he had
been able to spend so much uninterrupted time with Qui-Gon. He
would take a couple days in a bacta tank for that anytime.
"So, what have I been keeping you from while I've been
recovering?" Obi-Wan asked. He couldn't imagine that life in
the Temple had stopped when he's been hurt, and Qui-Gon was on
the council.
"Nothing important, I assure you. Mace's been heading the
meeting to the projects I'm running for the Council, and I've
been able to do quite a bit of research. I can honestly say I
think I have been more productive; it's amazing what one can
acomplish when one is basically uninterupted for an extended
amount of time."
Obi-Wan nodded silently and looked at the older man out of the
corner of his eye. Qui- Gon seemed content to sit with him in
the garden and looked as though he had found some measure of
peace with their situation.
"Things are different between us," Obi-Wan began hesitantly. He
knew it and he needed to know if Qui-Gon had noticed the change
as well.
Qui-Gon nodded. "They are. I don't see how they could remain
the same after what has happened." The older man did not look
at him and he seemed nearly as hesitant to speak as Obi-Wan. It
was not an obvious hesitation, but Obi-Wan had spent too much
time with the other man not to see the clues.
"What, what do you think will happen with what is between us?"
Obi-Wan nearly rolled his eyes at his own vagueness. He didn't
think he could walk around the issue any more if he tried. He
supposed though, it was really the result of years of
diplomatic trained. He only hoped the man who had taught him
would understand his meaning.
"There are several things to consider." Qui-Gon said slowly.
"I've done some reading over the past few days, mostly while
you were sleeping," a faint smile touched his face. "From what
we know, once the bond settles between us, we will no longer
have to maintain this level of closeness. The need we have to
be together will pass, though we will feel benefits if we are
together. We'll be able to be separate, though to do so for
long periods of time can be stressful. It also means that we
will be able to contact one another anywhere at any time
without the use of comlinks."
Obi-Wan nodded, it was nothing more than he had expected. Both
the information and the way Qui-Gon presented it were not
surprising. Apparently he was not the only one who was hesitant
to speak of the deeper issues.
Drawing a breath, Obi-Wan turned slightly and looked directly
at his former Master. "And what of us. Do you want us to go
back to leading the lives we have been living?"
Qui-Gon regarded him for a long moment and Obi-Wan was not
entirely certain he would speak at all. "I would not."
"What do you want?" His voice dropped to little more than a
whisper, though he knew Qui-Gon could hear him.
The moment stretched between them and Obi-Wan watched as
thoughts and emotions passed through Qui-Gon's eyes. He knew
the other man could have easily masked his feelings and was
relieved to see the dark blue eyes so expressive. He was
certain the other man was as unsure of thier relationship as he
was.
"I want us to have the time together than we have had in the
past years. I want to know you as more than my former padawan
and current equal. I want more than a professional relationship
with you. I want to share my life with you, such as it is, for
as long as you would have me. I want," he paused and looked
directly into Obi-Wan's eyes, his hand reaching to slid along
the skin of Obi-Wan's cheek; it was an odd and almost painful
echo of the touch Qui-Gon had bestowed on him on Naboo. "I
think you know what I want, because I think you want it as
well."
Obi-Wan released as breath he had not been aware he had been
holding. Despite all the clues and the signals that had been
traded between them over the past several days, he had not been
entirely certain of Qui-Gon's reaction. It all seemed so simple
now, but he had never wanted to do anything that would make
this man think less of him. He was too important.
Qui-Gon's fingers were still resting on his cheek and after a
moment, the strong hand curled around his jaw and rested
lightly on the side of his neck. Gentle pressure called Obi-Wan
forward as Qui-Gon moved closer as well. His mind had only a
few scant seconds to interpret what was about to happen before
Qui-Gon's lips brushed his own and blocked all thought.
His world narrowed down to only the impression of Qui-Gon. The
sight, sound and smell of the man filled his senses and it was
as if everything else in the universe had simply disappeared.
He knew on some level they were in the middle of a public, if
seldom used, Garden but he didn't care. It seemed there were a
lot of things he couldn't seem to work up the effort to care
about recently.
With his right hand still entwined in Qui-Gon's, Obi-Wan ran
his free hand up the familiar fabric of Qui-Gon's outer robe
and into the other man's hair. Obi-Wan pulled his former master
closer as his tongue sought to make closer more intimate
contact with Qui-Gon. The older man opened willingly to his
exploration and as he slid into the dark heat of Qui- Gon's
mouth it was almost as if he were coming home. His fantasies
over the years paled in comparison to the reality of Qui-Gon's
touch and his willing acceptance.
Needing to be closer, pulled along by his own desire, and the
need of the bond, Obi-Wan freed his hand from Qui-Gon's and
gripped the other man's head tightly. Without releasing his
hold or ceasing his extensive exploration of Qui-Gon's mouth,
Obi-Wan rose to his knees and straddled Qui-Gon's long,
outstretched legs, bringing their bodies into full contact.
Qui-Gon's strong arms immediately wrapped themselves around his
back and pulled his flush against his chest. Both men gasped as
their erections brushed together through the fabric of their
robes. Qui-Gon moaned softly as Obi-Wan pushed more forcefully
into his mouth, an imitation of a much more intimate act.
Obi-Wan deepened the kiss and moved his hands, searching for an
edge to Qui-Gon's robes; he wanted more than the contact they
had. He wanted to touch Qui-Gon's bare skin, to feel the warm
flesh under his fingertips and know that Qui-Gon wanted him.
His fingers slipped beneath the smooth fabric of Qui-Gon's
outer tunic and ran his fingers reverently along the newly
exposed and warm skin of his chest.
Qui-Gon shifted beneath his and tightened his grip, pulling
Obi-Wan closer. Another sound escaped from deep within Qui-Gon
and Obi-Wan grinned against his mouth. He loved it that he
could make those sounds come from this man. Running a light
finger across Qui-Gon's chest, he circled a nipple and felt a
shudder run through the other man's body.
Obi-Wan's comlink sounded.
Trying to keep himself in the moment, Obi-Wan ducked his head
and took hte small peaked flesh into his mouth, pulling another
moan from Qui-Gon. He didn't want to talk to anyone, the only
person who was importnat to him right now was with him. He was
busy.
The comlink sounded again and this time Qui-Gon leaned back,
placing his hands on Obi- Wan's shoulders. He didn't look
terribly happy about the situation, though.
Obi-Wan fumbled with his own robes for a moment trying to turn
his mind away from the magnificent man's lap he was currently
straddling. It was difficult to concentrate when he'd had his
tongue in the other man;s mouth only a moment before and
Qui-Gon was sitting before him, half exposed.
"Kenobi," he said shortly, nearly growling into the device.
Qui-Gon quirked a smile at him and began running tantalizing
hands across Obi-Wan's thighs.
"Knight Kenobi, this is Mace Windu, is Qui-Gon with you?"
Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and held the comlink out to the other
man.
"I'm here," Qui-Gon answered calmly as he picked up one of
Obi-Wan's hands and began sucking on his fingers.
"The Council has some new developments and we would like to see
you now, please."
"We'll be there as soon as possible," Obi-Wan managed to say
with some amount of control. He flicked off the device and dove
back into the dark sweetness of Qui-Gon's mouth.
"That wasn't very nice," he said after a few moments, his lips
barely leaving Qui-Gon's as he spoke.
"I know, but it was fun." Qui-Gon grinned at him, his blue
eyes lit with mischief.
Obi-Wan caught both of his former master's hand and held them
against the ground and he leaned closer, his lips just barely
brushing Qui-Gon's. He'd found after only a short time that he
was very fond of that position. "I'm sure." He bit Qui-Gon's
lower lip, pulling the tender flesh between his teeth, and
worrying at it with just a touch of pressure. Slowly, he
pressed himself once again against the other man, rubbing their
bodies together slowly, feeling Qui-Gon harden against him.
With a grin, he pulled away suddenly and stood. "We should go."
Qui-Gon looked up at him for a long moment, his eyes slightly
glazed. As it slowly sank in that Obi-wan was not returning to
his previous position, a slight frown marred his handsome face.
He shook his head slowly and seemed to try to gather himself up
to move.
Seeing the look, Obi-Wan extended a hand and helped the other
man to his feet. With his hold he pulled Qui-Gon to his feet
and stepped close to him for a swift kiss. He allowed himself
to be lost in the kiss for just a moment before he pulled away,
though he did not release Qui-Gon's hand.
"We'll finish this later." Obi-Wan assured him as they began
walking toward the exit.
"I'll hold you to that." Qui-Gon tightend his grip on Obi-Wan's
hand.
"Promise?"
Qui-Gon's eyes darkened and Obi-Wan could not suppress his
shudder of anticipation as they left the Garden.
"I though they said they wanted to see us right away." Obi-Wan
said as they entered the Council chambers to find them empty.
"Something isn't right about this." Qui-Gon said, his tone
serious as he scanned the room.
"It's almost as it was..." Obi-Wan too began scanning the room,
automatically pulling his lightsaber from his robes, noting
Qui-Gon had done the same.
"What?" Qui-Gon looked at him out of the corner of his eye as
he began walking steadily to the door.
"This, it's" he paused unable to place the feeling, it was
almost as if it were very familiar, but he could remember no
similar circumstances. A sudden and unexplained pain flashed
through him and as he reached out to the Force to search for
any disturbance, he found it lacking. It was still there, he
could feel it, but he had no access to it. He shot a glance at
Qui-Gon and saw the other man had found the same. "This is as
it was before, in my apartment." Obi-Wan said softly, the
images of the attack coming to him without warning. Acting
purely on reflex and remembered pain, he dove towards Qui-Gon
and shoved the other man to floor.
A power beam flashed over their heads and the two Jedi rolled
to their feet, their lightsabers held at the ready. Years of
training and practice coupled with years spent together as a
team marked their stances as they each covered a specific area
and at the same time protected the other.
When the next flash came, they were ready for it. It was more
difficult to deflect without the help of the Force, but not
impossible. Obi-Wan wondered briefly as he deflected the next
beam what the attacker had hoped to accomplish. This sort of
activity in the Council chamber would not go unnoticed and even
without the Force he and Qui-Gon should be able to deflect the
beams indefinably. It made no sense.
Without warning, another beam shot across the room, this time
from the opposite direction, followed closely by one from the
original position. The addition of the new attacker seemed to
be a signal of sorts to increase fequencey of shots as a steady
stream of the deadly beams began firing across the room from
either direction. Obi-Wan and Qui- Gon split themselves up to
cover both attackers and worked seamlessly to defend each
other.
After a few moments however, the plan seemed to make more
sense; Obi-Wan could feel himself weakening. While he would
have been able to deflect the beams indefinitely under normal
circumstances, he found he was weakening quickly. He still had
yet to recover fully and his strength was already being tested.
Sweat ran freely down his face and body and his breath was
coming in labored gasps. The constant barrage of power beams
was taxing his weakened system and he didn't know how much
longer he could last.
A change in the pattern of shots caught Obi-Wan off-guard and
he miscalculated his position slightly, causing one of the
beams to graze his arm. Though the wound was not serious it was
painful and Obi-Wan fell heavily to one knee. He was able to
bring up his lightsaber in time to save himself from a direct
blast, but he knew he would not be able to last much longer.
"Obi-Wan!"
He could not spare a glance for the other man. "Fine," He
managed to gasp out between labored breaths. He could not spare
more of his attention and he didn't want Qui-Gon to spare more
of his.
As the pattern of shots began to change significantly, it took
Obi-Wan a moment to realize that the danger was now in more
capable hands. The Council chamber had suddenly been filled
with the other Council members, their lightsabers ignited as
they took care of the attackers.
When the beams finally stilled, Obi-Wan numbly powered down
his lightsaber and placed both hands flat against the cool tile
of the chamber, his chest heaving for breath. A hand fell on
his uninjured shoulder and he knew instinctively it was
Qui-Gon. He looked up and gave him a weak smile he knew would
not fool the other man and shuddered as his connection to the
force was restored.
Obi-Wan concentrated on regulating his breathing as the
commotion in the room died down around him. As the adrenaline
of the battle began to wane, the pain from the power beam
asserted itself more firmly. Again, Qui-Gon's gentle hands were
on him and the Healing Force washed over him. Within moments,
the other Council members had joined his former master and he
was nearly wrapped in the Force and in Healing.
When the Force around him began to fade Obi-Wan was able to
straighten without pain. Apparently there were some advantages
to a room full of highly trained and adept Force users. He was
able to stand without pain, though he was still weary; some
things even the Force could not fix entirely.
Qui-Gon kept a tight hold on his arm as he led him to a chair
that had been provided. He smiled up at the other man as he was
pushed into the chair and met a concerned look. Qui-Gon
squeezed his shoulder before he looked up at the council and a
sudden change came over his expression.
The older man stalked across the room and pointed a finger at
Mace Windu. "What exactly do you think you are doing?"
"What?" Mace took a step back and looked at Qui-Gon the
surprise on his face matched clearly in his force signature.
"You tell me. You called us here." Obi-Wan looked on in
concern, his former master rarely used that tone of voice with
anyone other than the most vile of individuals.
"Qui-Gon, I never called you here. I've been with Master Yoda
all afternoon. If someone wanted you here, they must have used
my voice to attract your attention. I would never hurt you, or
Obi-Wan."
"Speaking the truth he is. Together all afternoon we have
been." Master Yoda said calmly.
Obi-Wan watched as Qui-Gon considered the words. Finally his
posture relaxed and some of the tension went out of him. He
nodded to Mace. "I'm sorry." He said simply as he moved back
across the room to Obi-Wan.
"It's perfectly understandable. Can you tell us what happened
here?" The Council members took their seats and directed their
full attention to them.
Qui-Gon took a breath. "We were called here, cut off from the
Force and attacked apparently by droids programmed to fire at
any moving object. It was well planned, though not entirely
effective. Even recovering, you'll note we were able to hold
off the attack until help arrived."
"I've been thinking about that, Masters, if I may." Obi-Wan
paused. "If the attackers knew we would be cut from the Force,
might they then also suspect that the bond between Qui- Gon and
myself might also be severed, leaving us both in extreme pain
if not completely incapacitated?"
Qui-Gon nodded. "It would certainly make us much more likely
targets." He paused and looked intently at Mace. "Do you think
now you have enough cause to provide more protection for
Obi-Wan? Not only was this the second attempt on his life, but
the second within the Temple itself. I would think that would
be cause enough for alarm."
"And you'll note I was not the sole focus of this attack. If I
myself am not significant enough to warrant protection, then
perhaps you should look to the safely of one of your council
members." Obi-Wan almost smiled at the startled expression that
came over Qui- Gon's face. The older man shouldn't be
surprised, he'd learned to challenge the Council at Qui-Gon's
side from nearly his first day as padawan.
"Perhaps it would be best if we continued this conversation
when we are not so emotionally charged." Plo-Koon advised as
the tension in the room increased.
"Perhaps you should-"
Obi-Wan cut off the other man quickly. "I think that would be
best for all, Master." He stood carefully, resting a hand on
the back of the chair, not trusting his ability to stand
unaided.
As he'd hoped, his movement drew Qui-Gon back to his side. He
looked at Qui-Gon intently, letting his inner shield fall
slightly as he cast his thoughts to the other man. /Let it rest
for now./
Qui-Gon's intense blue eyes widened almost imperceptibly. "We
will take our leave now and continue this later." He told the
others with great authority, sounding as though the idea had
been entirely his own. /Are you well?/
/I will be, just help me home./
Qui-Gon settled Obi-Wan on the couch before going into the
kitchen area to prepare some tea. He knew his own nerves were
in need of settling and more than suspected the same could be
said for Obi-Wan.
He drew a slow breath and began releasing his fears and
concerns to the Force. It had been a close fight and he had no
desire to consider if Obi-Wan's words were true. Had the shield
cut them off from their newly developing bond, Qui-Gon did not
see how either of them could have survived.
And still the others on the Council could not see the attack
for what it was, could not see that Obi-Wan was not safe. They
were exellent Jedi each one of them, and indivudually men and
women he was proud to call friends, but as a group they were
highly conservative. Once again he questioned his place on the
Council. He had such different views and ideas from them, he
found he had a difficult time reconciling the situation.
When the tea was ready, he brought it to the other room and sat
beside Obi-Wan. The younger man's eyes were closed and his head
was resting on the back of the couch. Qui- Gon could tell he
was not sleeping, but he could feel his weariness. They sat in
silence and stillness for several long moments. Qui-Gon simply
drank in the sight of Obi-Wan, his pale skin, the arch of his
neck and the cleft to his chin which begged to be bitten.
"See something you like?" Obi-Wan's blue-grey eyes flickered
open and shifted to look at Qui-Gon, though no other part of
him moved.
"More than like." Qui-Gon reached out and ran a singer finger
along Obi-Wan's throat, eliciting a shiver from the younger
man. "Tea?" He asked innocently.
Obi-Wan made a distant questioning sound. "Tea?" He looked at
the steaming mugs on the low table before he closed his eyes
again as Qui-Gon continued to traces patterns on his skin. "Um,
no, but you could keep doing that, and I think that would be
fine."
Qui-Gon leaned in closer to the other man and let his lips
follow the trail his fingers had left. Obi-Wan made a contented
sound and arched his head back just a little further to allow
better access. When he reached Obi-Wan's chin, he gave in to
his temptation and bit lightly at the pale flesh, running his
tongue along the shallow crease feeling the faint beginnings of
the other man's facial hair. Qui-Gon slid his hand along
Obi-Wan's leg, up his thigh to rest comfortably on his hip.
In a sudden move, Obi-Wan dipped his head down slightly,
placing his mouth in direct line with Qui-Gon's. The two
enjoyed a gentle almost passive explorations of each other's
mouths, an experience far different from the one earlier that
afternoon. After several long moments, Obi-Wan moved to deepen
the kiss at the same time pulling Qui-Gon closer to him.
/Maybe we should move this elsewhere./ Qui-Gon said, infinitely
happy he could speak with the other man without having to
remove himself from the sweet recess of his mouth.
/That would be good./ Obi-Wan answered distractedly as he
sought out all the hidden niches of Qui-Gon's mouth.
/We have to move to do that./ Qui-Gon said, allowing a free
hand to run along the exposed flesh of Obi-Wan's neck. His
fingers dipped beneath the fabric of the tunic brushing lightly
against the defined bones just below Obi-Wan's throat.
/Okay./ Still Obi-Wan did not move beyond arching his body to
allow Qui-Gon greater access to his skin.
/Would you like some help?/
/What I would like is for you to get naked with me right now,
I don't really care where we are./ Obi-Wan's eyes flashed open
and his previously passive body was suddenly in action. His
fine, strong hands were moving over Qui-Gon, pulling the tunics
from him with more grace and ability than Qui-Gon had thought
possible a moment ago.
Obi-Wan's mouth moved away from his own and traveled along the
exposed areas of his chest and Qui-Gon drew a long shuddering
breath. He stood quickly and extended a hand to Obi-Wan,
drawing the other man up from his place on the couch. As he
pulled Obi- Wan with him to the bedroom, his fingers again
found the edges of Obi-Wan's tunic and began stripping them
from the other man's narrow frame. By the time they reached the
bedroom, a string of outer robes and tunics littered the floor
behind them and both stood only in their leggings and boots.
Obi-Wan took a step back and ran an appreciative gaze over him.
"I always loved looking at you in those boots, and I think I
wasn't the only one with that opinion. I'm sure we were able to
resolve a number of conflicts based entirely on your appearance
alone. Who would want to fight when they could look at you
instead."
"I think it helped more than once that you were by my side."
Qui-Gon again closed the distance between them, running his
hands possessively along Obi-Wan's side. He pressed himself up
against the younger man and pushed him back towards the bed.
When Obi- Wan fell back against the bed, Qui-Gon took great
care in removing the rest of the younger man's clothes.
With great patience and deliberateness, he pulled the dark
brown boots from Obi-Wan's legs. Keeping his eyes locked on
Obi-Wan's he ran his large hands along the other man's narrow
waist until he reached the edge of his leggings, he let his
fingers play lightly across the warm flesh there before moving
on. As he allowed his fingers to slide against the skin beneath
Obi-Wan's leggins, he dipped his head and ran his mouth and
tongue along the smooth pale flesh of Obi-Wan's waist. He
pulled the leggings from the slim body, his mouth following the
cloth along the outer edge of his hip, across his thigh and
down his long legs. The younger man stilled beneath him though
his chest heaved his gasping breaths.
Qui-Gon pulled back after placing a single kiss to the inside
of Obi-Wan's knee and took his first full look at the younger
man. Obi-Wan's pale skin was flushed and his hair pleasantly
disheveled and his eyes were dangerously narrowed as Qui-Gon
continued to watch him unmoving. The younger man's cock was
already hard and leaking waiting for Qui-Gon's touch.
Obi-Wan's darkened eyes raked over him hotly. "You need to be a
lot more naked." He growled as he leaned forward, pulling
Qui-Go to him. Strong hands ran along Qui-Gon's back and chest
before sliding into the back of his leggings to rest
possessively on his ass.
Qui-Gon nodded dumbly and pulled away slightly as he began
pealing his leggings and boots from his body. Within moments,
he was back in Obi-Wan's arms, naked flesh pressed against
naked flesh. At the first touch, the bond that had been
distantly present between them since the first attack flared to
life, leaving both of them breathless as it began to strengthen
a solidify within them.
Obi-Wan pulled him down to lie beside him on the large bed,
running clever fingers across his skin. The younger man caught
his lower lip and began worrying at it with his teeth and
tongue before pulling away slightly leaving him only a breath
away.
"This feels right," he said, his hands straying down Qui-Gon's
flank and slipping across sweat slicked skin. His strong hands
brushed lightly against the firm flesh of Qui-Gon's cock before
he wrapped a hand around it and stroked it slowly.
Qui-Gon made and affirmative sound. "Feels good." He arched
into Obi-Wan's touch before leaning forward to suck at the
exposed skin at the base of his throat. He ran his own hands
across Obi-Wan's body exploring the dips and curves of the
well-loved frame. He traced Obi-Wan's body, learning it with
his fingers as he found the lines of old scars and discovering
new ones.
Pressing against Obi-Wan, he pushed the younger man onto his
back. He wanted to touch and taste every inch of his former
padawan. He wanted to know everything and have it imprinted
forever in his memory. Starting at Obi-Wan's hairline and
forehead before moving to his changeable eyes and nose, Qui-Gon
wanted to feel every section of the younger man's face with his
lips and tongue. He stopped in his exploration and spent
several long moments devoting his attention to the younger
man's mouth, delighting in the welcoming heat. He moved on
finally to the small cleft in his chin, a feature he found
particularly attractive.
Obi-Wan's hands roamed restlessly over his body as he explored.
The younger man shifted slightly, aligning their cocks and
began a slow, rocking motion sending flares of pleasure along
Qui-Gon's nerves. He moaned into Obi-Wan's skin and thrust his
hips against Obi- Wan's. His exploration of the younger man's
body was temporarily shelved in favor of the new activity as
they both increased their pace, clutching each other tightly.
It took only moments, the sensations were too new and had been
desired for too long for it to last. Qui-Gon felt Obi-Wan
shudder minutely beneath him for he stilled and thrust one last
time against his hips. Obi-Wan's hands clutched at his
shoulders and he bit into Qui- Gon's neck, muffling the sound
of his cry as he came. The sight of Obi-Wan beneath him lost in
the moment of passion was more than enough to push Qui-Gon over
the edge. He joined Obi-Wan calling out the name of his lover
as he gained his own release.
Qui-Gon collapsed heavily on his side drawing Obi-Wan to his
chest. He ran his hands through the younger man's short hair
absently as contentment filled him. They lay in silence for
several long moments before Obi-Wan moved, and then it was only
to stroke a hand possessively along Qui-Gon's thigh.
/I can feel you better now./ Obi-Wan said silently, his mouth
occupied with leaving a trail of marks along Qui-Gon's chest.
/It does seem stronger than before./ Qui-Gon answered, not
wanting to take the energy to speak out loud. It seemed better
to use their growing link.
Obi-Wan stilled suddenly, his hand freezing and his body
tensing. "Is this because of the bond?" The younger man had
closed himself off, though he had not moved away.
"I'm not sure I understand." Qui-Gon said carefully. Something
was obviously upsetting his lover.
"This, us here. Is it because of the bond? Did you want this at
all?" It sounded like the younger man was on the verge of
either an argument or extream agitation.
"Is it for you? I sincerely hope not because I have wanted this
for longer than is appropriate. Since before you were knighted.
The only reason this feels so right is because I have wanted it
for so long. Having you away from me has been harder than
nearly anything else I've faced in my life." He tightened his
hold on Obi-Wan. "I've loved you for years, Obi-Wan
Kenobi."
"Oh." Obi-Wan relaxed again, his body a comfortable weight in
Qui-Gon's arms. "I love you too, you know. I wanted to tell
you, after I was knighted, but it never seemed the right time."
Obi-Wan shifted and maneuvered his body to half lay on top of
Qui-Gon. "And then as months turned into years, it just got
harder. Both to tell you and to be away from you."
Qui-Gon drew an unsteady breath as Obi-Wan began sucking at the
vulnerable flesh of his neck. "If only we had known sooner." He
said shakily, having a difficult time concentrating on the
conversation.
"But we know now." Obi-Wan said softly against is neck. "And we
can make up for the lost time."
Qui-Gon could feel the younger man's smile against his skin and
he couldn't help the laugh that bubbled out of him.
Obi-Wan leaned back and looked at him, a smile lighting his
face. "You find something amusing?"
Qui-Gon shook his head still chuckling. /Not at all, love./
/I wouldn't want you to think I was funny looking or anything./
Obi-Wan sent him silently as he settled more comfortably on top
of him.
/Not at all, nothing funny looking here./ Qui-Gon assured him
as he leaned up to kiss the lips that were so close to his own.
Obi-Wan returned his kiss enthusiastically, his long fingered
hands tangling in Qui-Gon's hair. /I've always loved your hair,
you know? It's so soft and long and just always seemed to fit
the image of the Jedi maverick./ After a moment, Obi-Wan pulled
away from Qui- Gon's mouth and hair, sliding down his body. He
stopped randomly, kissing and sucking at Qui-Gon's flesh as he
went, commenting on areas he particularly liked. Qui-Gon for
his part simply laid back and enjoyed the movement of the
younger man.
/You have such nice thighs./ Obi-Wan said absently as he
avoided Qui-Gon's slowly returning erection. The younger man
settled comfortably between his legs and ran his tongue along
the top edge of his thigh. /They're very strong, powerful./
Qui-Gon shifted uncomfortably, he wanted Obi-Wan to touch him,
but it seemed the younger man was intent on his study of his
legs.
/They aren't however, your most interesting feature./ Obi-Wan
smiled up at him, holding eye contact as he shifted slightly
and ran his tongue every lightly along the side of Qui- Gon's
now fully renewed erection, cleaning off the evidence of their
previous activity.
Qui-Gon shuddered at the sensation of Obi-Wan's tongue on him,
though he tried to control his movements. He didn't want to do
anything that would stop Obi-Wan from what he was doing. He
kept his eyes locked on Obi-Wan as the younger man repeated his
action, taking a moment to swirl his tongue around the head of
his cock. However, a moment later Qui-Gon was forced to close
his eyes when Obi-Wan finally enclosed him completely in his
mouth.
Obi-Wan took him deeply in his mouth and it was all Qui-Gon
could do to hold still. The younger man's mouth worked him
expertly, running teasingly along his length and taking him to
the edge before backing off several times. His talented tongue
and light use of teeth moved over his sensitized skin and he
could do little more than lay back and allow Obi- Wan to do as
he willed.
A few moments later, or maybe it had been hours Qui-Gon could
no longer tell, Obi-Wan pulled away and Qui-Gon thrust
helplessly into the empty air, groaning at the loss of
sensation and contact. Shortly afterward however, Obi-Wan's
tongue and mouth were once again on him, this time laving
patiently over his balls and the insides of his thighs. Qui-Gon
shifted slightly, opening his legs further, to allow Obi-Wan
all the access he required. He reached out and caught hold of
Obi-Wan's head, his fingers grasping at the fine hair; he
didn't try to guide the younger man, he only wanted as much
contact as he could manage.
/I want you./ Obi-Wan whispered through their bond, his strong
fingers skimming along Qui-Gon's legs to brush over his tight
opening.
Qui-Gon nodded wordlessly, unable to reply either verbally or
with his thoughts. He only knew he wanted nothing more than to
have Obi-Wan as close to him as he could manage. He opened his
legs wider, drawing them up to allow the younger man to move
closer.
/So beautiful./ Obi-Wan said reverently along the bond. /You
have oil?/ He sat back and looked around the room.
/What?/ Qui-Gon hadn't been paying close attention. He was
focused on the physical presence of Obi-Wan and the sound of
his voice, more than the actual words.
Obi-Wan smiled at him gently, leaning up to kiss him slowly and
thoroughly. He ran calming hands along Qui-Gon's side as he sat
back. /Shhh, love calm down just a little for me. Do you have
any oil?/
Qui-Gon took a deep breath, centering himself and calming his
body. /Yes, in the drawer./ He opened the bedside drawer with
the Force and pulled the small bottle to him before handing it
over to Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan kissed his fingers as he took the bottle and moved back
to his place between Qui- Gon's legs. Qui-Gon watched through
half lidded eyes as Obi-Wan opened the bottle and carefully
poured some of the unscented liquid into his cupped hand. Even
though he saw what Obi-Wan was doing, he still sucked in a
startled breath when the younger man poured the slightly cool
oil over his heated flesh. Obi-Wan followed the trail of the
oil with his slick fingers slowly, as though painting images on
his skin. Qui-Gon's balls were lovingly stroked and fondled and
his thighs massages briefly before Obi-Wan's slick fingers
found his sensitive ring of muscle.
A single finger ran over his opening several times, each pass
pressing more firmly into his skin until finally the tip of the
younger man's finger slid inside him. Qui-Gon gripped the
sheets tightly in his fists as Obi-Wan slid his finger
carefully inside, massaging his sensitive skin and stretching
him slowly. Qui-Gon couldn't help his involuntary jerk as
Obi-Wan found his prostate and rubbed up against it slightly.
"Again." He demanded, his voice hoarse and barely recognizable
as his own.
His order was met almost immediately as Obi-Wan rubbed over the
sensitive gland again, this time with more force. Qui-Gon
rocked onto the finger inside of him as another joined the
first and then a third. At some unknown time later when he
thought he could take no more before losing every shred of
control he had, Obi-Wan removed his fingers and leaned up to
catch his mouth in a deep kiss.
/Are you ready?/ Obi-Wan asked, the tension in him was almost a
separate physical presence.
/Yes./ Qui-Gon arched up as he felt the blunt head of Obi-Wan's
erection brush against him before sliding just inside. The
younger man paused before pushing in further, the pressure
steady and even. He reveled in the intimate contact, feeling
Obi-Wan within him and they both stilled as the younger man
finally rested flush against him.
/Can you feel me?/ Obi-Wan asked, the last of his shields
falling away, opeing himself mentally as Qui-Gon had
physically.
/Force, yes./ Qui-Gon allowed shields that had been in place
most of his life to fall and he accepted Obi-Wan's presence
within him fully. It was like nothing he had ever known before
and for a long moment they lay together fully entwined and
unmoving preserving the moment as best they could.
Finally, however, their physical needs won out and Obi-Wan
began to move. The younger man thrust slowly and gently into
him at first, angling his thrusts to rake against Qui-Gon's
prostate with every move. Obi-Wan leaned down and caught his
mouth again, pulling away only to gasp in deep breaths before
returning. His pace had increased and he reached a hand between
them to stroke Qui-Gon's own aching cock in time with his
movements.
Qui-Gon knew he was close, and he reveled in Obi-Wan's every
movement and touch allowing himself to ride along with the
sensation. As Obi-Wan's rhythm changed to something more primal
and unplanned, Qui-Gon thrust back into him as they pounded
their bodies together. Obi-Wan pulled out almost entirely
before slamming back in and it was enough to push Qui-Gon over
the edge. He jerked and tightened every hold he had on Obi-Wan
pulling the younger man closer to him as he came, unable to
make any sound at all even though he opened his mouth for a cry
that would not leave him.
He felt Obi-Wan shudder and pull back slamming home again
before crying out his release. /Love you./ He called across
their bond and Qui-Gon was able to actually feel Obi-Wan's
emotions as they were directed at him. Obi-Wan gave a few
gentle thrusts before he collapsed on his side, pulling out of
Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon reached out and gathered Obi-Wan to him, running
soothing hands over the sweat slicked skin, not trying to
arouse, but to retain some of their connection. The younger man
rested his head on Qui-Gon's chest and curled around him, his
hand resting over Qui-Gon's heart.
/I can feel all of you./ Obi-Wan said quietly along the bond
and in the deepest parts of his mind.
/And I you./ He brushed back Obi-Wan's damp hair, looking into
the blue-grey eyes.
Obi-Wan tightned his hold on Qui-Gon briefly before letting his
eyes slid closed. /Love you./ he said, his mental voice sleepy
and slightly disjointed.
/Always./
Something was holding him and he couldn't get away. It was dark
and he couldn't see but he knew something was wrong. He
struggled against the grip, trying with all of his strength to
throw off his captor but it wasn't working. His breath was
coming in short gasping heaves and he knew that if he didn't
get away they would come for him and hurt him. A man stepped
from the shadows holding something, something that would hurt
him.
/Obi-Wan!/
It was a voice he knew and trusted, but the knowledge of his
captivity was too strong to still him.
/Obi-Wan, wake up. You're safe here, it's only a dream./
Obi-Wan's eyes flew open and he sat up quickly, pulling away
from the arms that held him, though he did not strike out. His
chest was heaving as though he had run through the halls of the
Temple at top speed for several minutes.
"Obi-Wan?"
He swung his head sharply to the sound of the voice and his
eyes fell on the sleep- disheveled form of Qui-Gon. Almost
immediately, the shadows of the dream broke away and Obi-Wan
recognized his surroundings. He took a deep calming breath and
moved back to rest beside Qui-Gon hesitantly.
"I didn't hurt you, did I?" He knew he had been struggling
against something, but whether it had been confined to his
dreams he did not know.
Qui-Gon shook his head, his magnificent eyes clouded with
worry. He opened his arms and Obi-Wan settled gratefully into
his embrace. "Do you want to talk?"
Obi-Wan thought for a moment. He knew his former master would
drop the subject entirely if he did not want to discuss it, but
it seemed important. He couldn't quite grasp what his dream had
been about, but he knew it was significant. "I don't remember
much," He offered finally.
"I do."
Obi-Wan looked up at the other man sharply. "What?"
"I saw most of what you did. The bond, our connection, it's
very strong and I was pulled into your dream." Qui-Gon took a
breath, his hands running through Obi-Wan's hair soothingly. "I
couldn't tell though, was it a memory of the past or a vision
of something to come?"
Obi-Wan closed his eyes, centering himself as he had been
taught many years ago to help him deal with his prescient
dreams. If a dream was a true vision of a possible future, it
always held a certain quality to it, but this one was
indistinct. Finally he shook his head and looked back at
Qui-Gon. "I don't know, it could be either. I could have been
remembering something of the past, or it could be something
that will happen, or both." Obi-Wan shook his head and settled
back against Qui-Gon.
Just the fact that he could share his thoughts and fears with
someone was a relief. It didn't matter that they might not be
able to understand what was happening, because after two long
years of solo missions and little contact with people who
didn't want him dead or gone, he was no longer alone.
"Perhaps you could speak with Yoda," Qui-Gon offered quietly,
wrapping his arms around Obi-Wan.
"I think that would be a good idea. Maybe I'll see him later
today, when it isn't still dark."
"Think you can sleep?"
"I could," Obi-Wan began, running a hand over Qui-Gon's chest.
"But I can think of other things to do that are much better."
He couldn't help the grin that spread across his face at
Qui-Gon's chuckle.
"Years of sexual repression and suddenly your insatiable."
"I wouldn't say I've been repressed. I can prove it. Would you
like to tie me up?" He laughed at the expression on Qui-Gon's
face before he leaned up and kissed him.
"Knight Kenobi, feeling better you are?" Yoda stepped back from
his door and allowed Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon entrance to his
apartment.
"I am well, thank you Master." Obi-Wan bowed his head slightly
to the small Jedi in deference before taking a seat on his
couch next to Qui-Gon.
Yoda looked at the two of them closely for a moment. "Better
for other reasons than healing I think." He said slyly.
/Is there a polite way to say I don't want to talk about my sex
life with your former master?/ Obi-Wan sent silently to
Qui-Gon, trying not to shift uncomfortably under Yoda's knowing
gaze.
"We've come about something rather important, Master." Qui-Gon
said, carefully defecting any further questions. Obi-Wan had to
admit there were advantages to having a top level diplomat on
your side.
"I had a dream this morning, but I've been unable to determine
whether it shows me a possible future or past. I was hoping you
could help." Obi-Wan said.
Yoda nodded. "Show me." The small Jedi instructed.
Obi-Wan felt Yoda's strong and unique presence on the edge of
his thoughts waiting to be shown the images of the dream.
Usually, the touch of the other Jedi's mind had been soothing,
but today it set of a slight wave of uneasiness though him.
Still, he brushed it off as nothing more than anxiety about his
dream and carefully lowered his outer shields to allow Yoda
inside.
The moment the older Jedi's presence was within his mind, pain
and nausea flared through him. He brought his hands to his head
and gripped his forehead tightly, trying to banish the pain.
Acting entirely on instinct, unable to think beyond the moment
or even focus his thoughts, he thrust Yoda's contact from his
mind, slamming up his mental shields.
"Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon was at his side, he could feel the older
man's presence and sense him through their bond. Obi-Wan
reached out instinctively to him though the bond letting the
connection sooth him.
After a moment he looked up to find himself on the floor of
Yoda's apartment, curled in on himself. Yoda was standing a
short distance away, though he made no move to come any closer.
As the sense of panic and nausea faded, Obi-Wan stood and
returned to his seat on the couch and sat staring at the floor
for a long moment.
"Are you all right, Master Yoda?" Obi-Wan asked quietly, not
looking at the old Jedi.
"I'm well, and you?"
Obi-Wan shook his head. "I think so." He would be.
"What was that?" Qui-Gon asked as he shifted slightly closer to
Obi-Wan.
"I don't know. It just felt wrong and I," Obi-Wan paused,
waving a hand indistinctly in Yoda's direction.
"Just completed your bond have you?" Yoda asked.
Obi-Wan looked up and nodded.
"Happens sometimes with strong connections. Sometimes handle
mental connections one or both of the bonded pair cannot. Last
long it will not, but seek to touch other minds while in this
state you should not." Yoda did not seem overly concerned.
"You've seen this before?" Qui-Gon asked, sliding as hand into
Obi-Wan's for which he was eternally grateful.
"Occasionally, when bonds are very strong. Stand the presence
of another within the mind a strong bond cannot, not at first.
Always before this has gone away, but careful you must be until
settled it has." Yoda nodded to them both before turning back
to Obi-Wan. "Perhaps tell me of your dream you should instead."
Obi-Wan took a breath, calmed by the presence of Qui-Gon and
the reassurance of the ancient Jedi. He quickly outlined as
much of the dream as he could remember, surprised to find
several of his blanks filled in by Qui-Gon. It seemed that
while the other man had been drawn into the dream he had been
able to maintain some emotional detachment.
When they had finished, Yoda sat back and looked thoughtfully
at the floor for a long while. "Difficult to see." He said
finally. "Visions of past and future combined, hard to know
which belongs where." He looked at them both very seriously.
"Careful you must be. Should injury befall either of you at
this stage, affect the other it will. Perhaps member of the
Council should be assigned to you."
"I don't know if that will be necessary-"
"Thank you for the offer, Master. I think that should be taken
into consideration." Qui- Gon interrupted him.
/What?/ Although Obi-Wan kept his face passive, he could not
keep the outrage out of his voice. Obi-Wan had no desire for
any member of the Council to be sitting around in their
apartment for an indefinite about of time until they had the
situation under control.
/I will not refuse any help that is offered in the safeguarding
of your life./ With their link, Qui-Gon's determination was
even more apparent.
Obi-Wan held back a sigh. He knew Qui-Gon and he knew better
than nearly anyone how stubborn the man could be. The
conversation was not over, but here was neither the time nor
place to have it. Qui-Gon could not keep him wrapped safely the
rest of his life, it would just take a little time to make the
other man understand that on an emotional level.
Obi-Wan nodded and returned his attention to Yoda. "Perhaps it
is something we should take into consideration, but I do not
think now is the time. I would like to think more on my dream
and what it means," he turned to Qui-Gon. "If you've no
objections?"
The other man stood and offered Obi-Wan a hand. "Not at all.
Master." He nodded to Yoda. "We should speak again soon."
The older Jedi followed them to the door and promised they
would meet again in the future. "Be mindful of the present, do
not loose sight of the danger to you both."
"I can't concentrate with you sitting there looking at us."
Obi-Wan said, opening is eyes and looking across the Garden
from his meditative pose.
"I'm sorry, Obi-Wan, but it's a Council decree. I have to keep
you in sight at all times, especially when you are potentially
vulnerable." Mace said with a solemn expression.
Obi-Wan tried to contain his impatience, but was not helped by
the fact that Mace was sincerely apologetic about having to
impose upon their space.
"I don't remember agreeing to anything like this. I
specifically remember saying to Master Yoda that we would take
it into consideration and speak on it more. Not an hour later
you show up. How am I supposed to live like this?"
"I think the more important question would be how are you not
supposed to live like this?" Qui-Gon said quietly at his side.
Obi-Wan's frustration bled out of him and he looked at Qui-Gon,
trying to block out the presence of Mace. "You can't spend the
rest of your life trying to keep me locked away under some sort
of protection. It's not who I am or what I do. You know that."
"But I can try to protect you, and this is only temporary."
Qui-Gon reached out and pulled Obi-Wan's hand into his own.
Closing his eyes, Obi-Wan let out a sigh. "So why are we
sitting here doing nothing? It certainly isn't helping
anything, they still managed to attack us. I think it is far
past time to take the offensive in this matter. I want my life
back and I can't have it while everyone in the Temple holds
their collective breath every time I take a walk."
"You have an idea?" Qui-Gon asked.
"You could say that. What the first rule of subterfuge?"
Obi-Wan asked, knowing how his former master would respond, he
had learned the lesson from the other man after all.
"Make the other side think they have what they want."
"Exactly. So we go out there and make them think that they are
getting me, but really we'll have a whole back up crew of Jedi
waiting in the wings." Obi-Wan shrugged. "Simple."
Mace shook his head. "It's too risky, there is always the
possibility that things will fall out of our control."
Qui-Gon shook his head at the Council member. "Things don't
seem to be to firmly in your control right now, Mace. I agree
with Obi-Wan. I think it's time we decided which rules to play
by."
Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon spent the better part of the next week
walking around the Temple with the obvious absence of any
Council members. They didn't expect any sort of attack
immediately, it was too soon after the last one, but they knew
the other side could not wait much longer. Whatever Obi-Wan had
managed to involve himself in couldn't stay blocked from his
memory forever, and they had made it a point to have some very
interesting conversations about his dreams in some semi-public
places.
However, none of this meant that the two were not on edge.
Qui-Gon particularly knew he would be much happier when
everything was over and the threat to his love's life had
ended. Of course, with the end of that threat came an entirely
new set of things to worry about. The comment Obi-Wan had made
in the Gardens when speaking with him and Mace stuck in his
mind and replayed over and over for him in his moments of
greatest doubt.
I want my life back.
Obi-Wan was clearly unhappy with his situation of being bound
to the Temple and Qui- Gon couldn't help but wonder how things
would change once he was fully healed and able to leave again.
He knew Obi-Wan would stay with him on Coruscant if he asked,
but the younger man would be miserable. He was a Jedi Knight,
born and bred and it would be cruel to ask him to give up the
life he had trained more years than some would live to spend
his time in the Temple. He had so much to give to the Order, it
would be selfish of him to keep Obi-Wan from his rightful
place.
But at the same time, he didn't know that he wanted to continue
his life as an active field Jedi. He'd run across the galaxy
for the better part of his adult life and he just didn't know
if he wanted to do it anymore. That was the reason he had taken
the council position. Ostensibly it had been to allow him to
contribute to the Order while recovering from Naboo, but it had
also given him time to think about what he wanted for the rest
of his life. And after more than two years, he still didn't
know anything beyond the fact that he wanted Obi-Wan in his
life.
"You're quiet this evening," Obi-Wan said as he took a seat
next to Qui-Gon on the couch of their apartment.
"Just thinking," Qui-Gon said. It was neither a specific answer
nor an unspecific one. He found he was not yet ready to discuss
his fears with Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan nodded, a thoughtful expression on his face. "About
what?"
He should have known. Perhaps he'd trained the younger man too
well. When all else failed however, movement to diversionary
tactics was necessary. "You." It wasn't a lie, only a
half-truth. Qui-Gon slid a finger along Obi-Wan's neck a
gesture he'd found the younger man enjoyed greatly.
Obi-Wan reached up and cover Qui-Gon's hand with his own.
Pulling it away from his neck he kissed the tip of a finger
before looking seriously at Qui-Gon. "We don't have to talk if
you don't want to, but I would appreciate it if you would think
a little more highly of me." Obi-Wan placed Qui-Gon's hand next
to him on the couch and picked up a datapad and began to read.
"Obi-Wan, I-"
Obi-Wan held up a hand. "It's okay, really." He turned his
attention back to the article he was reading.
They sat in silence for several moments, Qui-Gon watching as
Obi-Wan's blue-grey eyes moved swiftly over the words on the
datapad. When Obi-Wan put the reader aside, Qui- Gon thought he
might try to take up the conversation again but instead the
younger man drew a deep breath and closed his eyes.
Although he was tempted to ask Obi-Wan what he was doing, he
could sense through their bond that Obi-Wan was centering
himself in the Force. Instead he waited, mostly patiently, for
Obi-Wan to open his eyes and come back to him.
The younger man drew another slow breath and his eyes flickered
open. "Something will happen soon." He said, the certainty
evident in his voice.
"What did you see?" Although he himself had no gift of
foresight, he'd seen Obi-Wan's premonitions turn into reality
too many times to discount their authenticity.
The younger man shook his head. "It wasn't entirely clear." He
paused and flashed a grin at Qui-Gon. "You know, just once I
would like to have a vision that is both perfectly clear and
understandable. I don't think that is asking so much." The
smile dropped away from his face. "It'll be bad, whatever's
coming and it'll be soon."
Qui-Gon reached out and grasped Obi-Wan's hand. "We'll be
ready."
Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon walked slowly through the broad halls of
the Temple. They had no particular destination not path and the
time of their walk had been different every day. Officially, it
was to help Obi-Wan regain his strength and stamina, but
truthfully, it was to lure their opponent out of hiding.
Obi-Wan had been on edge for days. His premonition two days
before had left him with a deep feeling of unease he could not
shake and he found himself practically jumping at every stray
sound. Qui-Gon's presence had helped to sooth him greatly but
he still could not shake the feeling entirely.
Qui-Gon reached out and grasped his hand, holding it as they
walked. Obi-Wan turned his head and offered a small smile. It
still surprised him that his lover was willing to be so public
with their affection, but then it was Qui-Gon after all. He had
never met another so willing to follow his heart.
As they rounded a corner and entered the area of the Temple set
aside for training, a disturbance ran through the Force.
Obi-Wan followed it to its end and found it was centered in a
practice room not far from them. He looked up a Qui-Gon.
"Shall we?" he asked the other man.
Qui-Gon nodded and they set out for the room. As they stepped
inside, the sense of distress suddenly disappeared and the
doors slid shut behind them, locking. Obi-Wan spared a second
to flash a glance in Qui-Gon's direction knowing the other man
would be trying to contact the others.
Obi-Wan scanned the room, keeping watch as Qui-Gon's eyes went
slightly distant. A moment later the older man shook his head
minutely. /Blocked./ He said shortly. Obi- Wan swore as he drew
his lightsaber settling into a defensive position without
thought. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Qui-Go do the
same.
"You two are so predictable." A familiar voice carried across
the room. "Now, I would think after the last time you wouldn't
be so eager to walk into random rooms without knowing what
you're facing. I mean, I could understand the first one, Kenobi
being so ill and all. It excuses some carelessness, but this--I
suppose they just don't make Jedi like they used to." The voice
taunted them.
Obi-Wan suppressed a sigh. If there was anything he hated more
than being caught off guard it was fighting someone with a
superiority complex.
"I told you to stay out of this, Kenobi, I warned you several
times. But you didn't listen. Just like your master, too
stubborn by half." A man walked across the training room toward
them finally coming into view.
"Kendrik." Obi-Wan said softly, memories flooding him. The
older Jedi standing before them was highly esteemed within the
Temple and was only a step away from a Council seat.
Kendrik drew his lightsaber and stepped closer. He flicked a
hand in the direction of the back of the room and a pair of the
same droids that had attacked the men in the Council chambers
moved forward, blasters ready. One of the soundless beams shot
across the room only to be deflected by Qui-Gon.
As the droids began firing with more regularity, Kendrik moved
forward to face off against Obi-Wan. Since the droids were
providing a constant barrage of shots, Obi-Wan was on his own
against the other Jedi. Their blades clashed, each testing the
other's strength. While Obi-Wan knew he was well on his way to
recovery, if it were to come down to a match of stamina, he did
not know if he could win.
Obi-Wan felt Kendrik brush experimentally against his mental
shields and the touch made his stumble slightly. He slammed his
shields in place, reinforcing them with everything he had, but
he did not miss the calculating grin that passed over the other
man's features.
Kendrik moved in more forcefully, pushing Obi-Wan both mentally
and physically. He pushed against Obi-Wan's defenses with every
ounce of his long years of skill. Obi-Wan fought fiercely
trying to keep the other man's blade from his body and his
thoughts from his mind. At the same time he allowed allowed a
small part of his awareness to focus on Qui-Gon.
A loud crack echoed through the room and Obi-Wan knew Qui-Gon
had been able to dismantle one of the droids. The distraction,
however, cost Obi-Wan. Kendrik took advantage of the break in
Obi-Wan's focus and forced his way past Obi-Wan's mental
shields. At the touch of the other man's mind a scream caught
in Obi-Wan's throat. It was a thousand times worse than the
touch of the familiar and welcomed master Yoda and he lost all
sense of his surrounding. His focus narrowed down to one
thought, he had to get Kendrik out of his mind.
He shoved at the other man's presence with all of his power
brought about by panic and need. As the pain faded, Obi-Wan
opened eyes he was not aware he had closed and saw the still
form of Kendrik lying on the other side of the room, blood
flowing from his nose and Qui-Gon running to his side. Gentle
hands cupped his face and the soothing presence of Qui-Gon
resettled into his mind.
/Are you well?/
Obi-Wan nodded. The pain was nearly gone, though he felt
drained. His eyes strayed to the still form of the fallen Jedi.
/Kendrik?/
/Alive. I don't think quite expected that reaction, love./
/Neither did I./
Obi-Wan stood before the Council finishing his report. "The
when I was on Dalber last year I saw some of the same traces of
the activity. I ran into Master Nor and he said he'd not seen
any of the activity I had, that I shouldn't worry. I thought at
the time he was simply refusing to see the signs of a slavery
ring, but I couldn't be certain. I never suspected he was
involved." He paused. "And then just recently, I started seeing
the connections, I was nearly certain that it was being run by
someone in the Temple, but I didn't know who. I couldn't trust
anyone. I crossed paths with Kendrik again and he gave me the
same advice. I wasn't really any closer to coming up with an
answer, I don't know why he chose now to come after me."
Mace Windu nodded. "Thank you for your cooperation, Knight
Kenobi. May the Force be with you."
Despite the dismissal he heard in the Council member's tone,
Obi-Wan hesitated.
"Something else you wanted?" Yoda asked slyly. Not much got
past the small Jedi.
"I wanted to know if you've made a decision about Kendrik. What
will happen to him?" He knew the Council didn't want him to
ask, they probably didn't want anyone to ask, be he needed the
answer. So he took a page from the book of Qui-Gon Jinn and
looked back at the assembled members steadily.
"Undecided we are as to the fate of Kendrik. More we cannot
tell you."
Obi-Wan stood silently for a moment. "Will anyone know his fate
beyond this room when it is decided?"
"Are you saying we would try to keep this silent?" Plo-Koon
asked, disbelief coloring his tone.
Obi-Wan nodded sharply. "That is exactly my meaning. I think
those of us in the Temple have a right to know about this. And
I don't think you have the authority to keep us from the
truth." He felt a wave of approval brush along the bond he
shared with Qui-Gon and sent an acknowledgement in his
direction but did not turn his attention away from the center
of the chamber.
"I agree with Knight Kenobi. We cannot conceal this from the
Temple. The Jedi here are already aware of what had happened,
of the attacks on Knight Kenobi's life. We cannot hide this no
matter how much we might like to."
Ki-Adi-Mundi shook his head. "Of course you would side with
him, Qui-Gon. However, I think if you consider the situation a
with a little more care, you would see we are better off by
telling those in the Temple only the basic facts of the
situation."
Obi-Wan saw Qui-Gon stand from his seat out of the corner of
his eye. "What exactly do you mean by that?"
"We all know what he means Qui-Gon. Your judgment is clouded
where Knight Kenobi is concerned because of the nature of your
relationship with him. No one else on the Council feels that
this should be made public." Even Piell said with a slight nod
of his head.
Obi-Wan winced inwardly. He'd known this was coming, though
he'd hoped it would not. Still, he was too much of a realist to
assume the facts of their relationship and Qui-Gon's fitness
towards him would not be called into question.
Qui-Gon drew a breath and looked around the room. Obi-Wan could
see few dissented with Plo Koon's words. "If that is how I am
seen, then perhaps my time here has come to an end. I resign my
position as Council Member, effective immediately. May the
Force be with you." The tall man turned on his heel and walked
from the room. /I'll wait for you outside./ he sent as he left,
turning a deaf ear on to the sounds of protest and astonishment
coming from the Council.
Obi-Wan stood silently and patiently waiting for the group to
compose itself. It seemd to him they had forgotten his presence
for the moment, but he knew it would not be long before they
turned their attention to him again.
Yoda turned to him first. "More to discuss on this matter we
have, but keep you informed we will."
Obi-Wan bowed, it was the best he could hope for and the word
of the small Jedi was far better to him than that of any other
individual in the room. "Thank you, Master." He turned and left
the room, catching Qui-Gon's hand as he came into range. "Well,
that went well."
Qui-Gon nodded, but said nothing, gripping his hand tightly as
they began the walk back to their apartment.
/I'm sorry./ Obi-Wan said quietly, feeling it was better to
keep the conversation private.
Qui-Gon drew a breath. /It has been a long time coming, I
think. My ideas are too different from them. They do need
change, but they need it from a more gradual and less offensive
source. It is time for me to move on, because I am not that
person./
Holding his hand tightly, Obi-Wan sighed. /That does not mean
I'm not sorry. They had no right to say those things to you./
/They are true. My judgment is clouded where you are concerned,
but that is not what was driving my position. Unfortunately
they will never see that, and that is why I had to leave./
"What now?" Obi-Wan asked aloud as they entered their
apartment.
Qui-Gon shook his head. "I don't know."
"Have you thought at all about what you might do?" He
persisted.
"I hadn't planned on resigning my position today, or anytime
soon for that matter. I thought I might at some point in the
future, but not so soon. It felt right today to leave and I
don't regret it, I just don't know where I will go from here."
The older man sighed.
Obi-Wan took a breath and began carefully. "Have you considered
perhaps going back out into active duty? Retaking your old
position?"
Qui-Gon smiled at him sadly. "I have thought of it, that's one
of the reasons that I spent the last two years on the Council.
Naboo showed me that it may be time to put that aspect of my
life behind me. I find I have little desire and no taste to
continue the life I once lived. I don't want another padawan
and I don't want to run all over the galaxy running from
blaster fire and earthquakes. I've been looking into some
permanent positions here at the Temple and some of the other
Temples, as well as some systems that require a long- term
diplomat, but I don't know. The decision isn't as easy now as
it was just a few weeks ago." Qui-Gon met his eyes and Obi-Wan
had not doubt that the other man was trying to find a way for
their lives to fit together.
Obi-Wan nodded slowly. He too wanted to find a way they could
be together, but was having a hard time picturing his life in
one stationary place for the next fifty years or so. He would
give up the life he was leading now to be with Qui-Gon, but he
hoped there would be another solution. "How long do you think
it'll be before the bond settles?"
"I'm not sure, it isn't an exact science. We're much better off
than we were a few weeks ago, but I still think we have a way
to go."
Obi-Wan smiled and walked to stand in front of his lover,
pressing his body into the taller man. "And are there ways we
can help that along?"
Qui-Gon's arms came around him, pulling his as close as he
could. The older man leaned how and bit gently at his neck
before answering. "I could think of a few things."
Obi-Wan ran his hands along the other man's cloth covered back,
imagining the feel of skin. He pulled Qui-Gon's head down to
his own and kissed him, pushing his tongue into the other man's
mouth. Qui-Gon received him hungrily, allowing Obi-Wan control
of the kiss as he stroked his tongue over the now familiar
surfaces of his former master's mouth.
When he finally had to pull away for a breath, Obi-Wan leaned
back and looked up at Qui- Gon. "We're avoiding the issue you
know." He said calming, his voice only slightly breathless.
The older man nodded. "I know. But we can't do anything about
it now. I'm sure a solution will present itself. And until then
we shall do our best to live in the moment. It isn't dire yet;
we don't need to make the decision this afternoon." Qui-Gon
leaned down and sucked at the flesh of his chin.
Tilting his head back to allow the man greater access, Obi-Wan
sighed contentedly. "So long as we're clear."
Qui-Gon made something close to an affirmative sound. "Quite."
Strong, warm fingers worked their way beneath the edge of his
outer robes, sliding along his skin as Qui-Gon's mouth moved
from his chin to the sensitive area just behind his ear.
Obi-Wan relaxed against the other man and allowed him to pull
of his robes and tunic so long as he kept his mouth right where
it was. From the contentment and desire leaking across their
bond, he didn't think that would be much of a problem. Soon,
Qui-Gon had him standing in the middle of their common room
naked while the older man was still fully clothed.
Instead of making Obi-Wan feel awkward or exposed, the
difference in their state of dress fueled his desire for the
other man. He raked his eyes over Qui-Gon's clothed form
filling in with his mind's eye what he could not see. He knew
Qui-Gon's powerful body very well after their time together and
did not need see him to know what was there.
He leaned up and kissed the other man again, running his
fingers through the long, silken hair, untying it from its
usual hold and letting it fall across Qui-Gon's shoulders. He
let the long strands slide across his skin, just touching
Qui-Gon's shoulders.
Qui-Gon grasped his arms and pushed him to the couch, pressing
him into the cushions and settling his weight on top of him.
The older man continued to mouth along his neck and jaw as
Obi-Wan could not resist rubbing himself against the coarse
fabric of the other man's uniform. Qui-Gon pulled back his head
and grinned at him rather ferally. He took both Obi-Wan's hands
in one of his and pulled them over Obi-Wan's head, where they
rested against the arm of the couch. Qui-Gon held them still
for a moment, before removing his hand, leaving them fixed in
place with a little use of the Force.
Obi-Wan laughed as he tugged gently at his bonds. "Now there's
something they never taught us in our Force manipulation
classes."
Qui-Gon grinned at him again. "You'd be surprised," was all he
said before returning his attention to Obi-Wan's body.
Obi-Wan leaned back, relaxing into the cushions of the couch
knowing he was in capable hands, enjoying the feel of the other
man's hands on his body. They knew each other well now and the
period of exploration had ended, but the sensations of
Qui-Gon's hands and mouth always felt new.
Qui-Gon traced lines down his chest, fingers running lightly
over his ribs. Obi-Wan twitched as the light touch brushed his
sensitive sides, trying not to squirm under Qui-Gon's
manipulation. An almost evil glint appeared in Qui-Gon's eyes
as he straddled Obi-Wan's thighs and held him in his place. The
older man ran his fingers over his sensitive skin again,
seeking and finding the most sensitive areas. Soon, Obi-Wan was
laughing so hard he could not breath and twisting his body as
best he could in his restrained position to escape Qui-Gon's
clever fingers.
Finally Qui-Gon stopped, leaning back and studying Obi-Wan as
he tried to regain his breath. Qui-Gon ran a possessive hand
along his ribs, the pressure firm this time, but no less
taunting as it was not the touch Obi-Wan longed for. Qui-Gon's
hand ran back along his chest, this time circling his sensitive
nipples, pinching at them lightly and rolling them between his
fingers. The older man leaned down and ran his broad tongue
over the right then the left, pulling back to blow cool air
over them. Obi-Wan arched his body, trying to regain some
contact with Qui-Gon who had again leaned away from him.
Qui-Gon waited until Obi-Wan had stopped moving before he
leaned in again, this time to suck at the tender and sensitive
flesh near his collarbone. Again, as soon as Obi-Wan tried to
move the other man pulled away and waited.
Obi-Wan twisted against the Force bonds that held him in place.
He knew he could pull away if he wanted, but he had never seen
Qui-Gon like this and he wanted to follow through to the end.
So he stilled himself and drew a deep breath, trying to calm
himself. It was very difficult considering Qui-Gon was sitting
there looking at him like that.
"Have I told you how increadibly attractive you are?" Qui-Gon
asked, breathing the question into his skin just above his hip.
Obi-Wan drew a shuddering breath. "I think you may
have--mentioned it once or twice." He swallowed heavily as
Qui-Gon ran his tongue over his hip.
"I think it's worth going over more than once, don't you
think?"
"Um, yes?" Obi-Wan was having a hard time concentrating on
Qui-Gon's questions as his mouth ran closer and closer to his
straining cock. He wanted nothing more than to pull his hands
away, grab hold of Qui-Gon's head and guide him to the place he
needed, but he did not.
He did not move or let any sound escape him as Qui-Gon inched
closer until Obi-Wan could feel the other man's breath on his
cock. Obi-Wan closed his eyes, unable to watch Qui-Gon so close
to him yet not touching. He could feel the whisper of breath
across his skin and knew the other man was toying with him. It
took all his restraint not to thrust into the almost contact,
knowing it would be so much better if he waited.
At the first echo of a touch, Obi-Wan almost didn't recognize
that Qui-Gon was finally tasting him. The agile tongue ran
along his length slowly as Qui-Gon stopped to spend several
long moments paying careful and loving attention to his balls
and then again to his sensitive head. Qui-Gon swallowed him
deeply without warning them pulled away, turning his attention
again to the tender flesh of his hips and thighs.
"Qui-Gon." Obi-Wan managed to gasp out, his voice strained and
hardly recognizable as his own.
"Hmm?" Qui-Gon leaned forward to capture Obi-Wan's lips,
tugging at them and distracting him from his already scattered
thoughts.
When the other man pulled back he looked at Obi-Wan. "Did you
want something?"
"Yes." Obi-Wan said, indignantly. "You could be very naked
right now and you could--" Obi-Wan paused thinking of the best
way to convey his need. Instead of speech, he sent a very
graphic and detailed picture of exactly what he wanted. It
involved a naked and sweaty Qui-Gon deep inside him, the two of
them moving in a familiar and primal rhythm.
Obi-Wan could feel the heat of desire roll of Qui-Gon as his
image was received. The older man began stripping his robes and
leggings from him immediately. "Well, when you put it that
way--"
Soon, Qui-Gon's heated flesh was pressed heavily against his
own as the other man cupped his head in both hands and kissed
him deeply. Qui-Gon ran a hand down his side to cup his cock
lightly, stroking it slowly as they kissed, tongues moving
against each other with greater passion and need.
Finally, Qui-Gon broke away and moved to settle between
Obi-Wan's legs. Obi-Wan spread his legs for the other man,
arching into his touch as strong fingers ran along the insides
of his thighs before rubbing against the highly sensitive skin
behind his balls and around the tight ring of muscle.
Obi-Wan consciously relaxed himself, taking a deep breath as
Qui-Gon's first Force-slicked finger pressed inside. Now that
he was getting the contact he needed, the urge to move against
the other man was not quite as strong and he could focus on the
deeply pleasurable feeling of Qui-Gon's fingers sliding slowly
inside him. Obi-Wan rocked slowly at first, but then with
greater need as Qui-Gon carefully stretched him. His entire
body convulsed the first time Qui-Gon rubbed a single finger
over his prostate and he pulled tightly at the Force-bond still
holding him in place.
Qui-Gon leaned up and kissed the side of his cock, swiping his
tongue along the length. "Good?"
Obi-Wan couldn't form a verbal response. All he could do was
nod and hope the other man would repeat his action. When he
did, Obi-Wan growled low in his throat. He opened his eyes and
glared at the man between his legs.
"You have about five seconds to get inside me or--" He stopped,
unable to think of an appropriate threat. "You'll be very
sorry."
"Oh, will I?" Qui-Gon grinned at him and for a brief moment,
Obi-Wan thought he would stop entirely. Instead the other man
removed his fingers and leaned up over him. Obi- Wan could feel
the blunt head of the other man's erection poised to enter him
and he lunged up, taking Qui-Gon into himself.
Obi-Wan let out a low moan and rocked back, taking Qui-Gon
deeper feeling him both physically and mentally through their
bond. Qui-Gon leaned forward and kissed him deeply, opening
himself fully in allowing Obi-Wan fully into his thoughts.
Their minds intertwined as did their bodies as Qui-Gon began a
steady rhythm, slowly moving against and into Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan reveled in the contact. It was almost too much and at
the same time not nearly enough. He wanted to stay as connected
as he was with Qui-Gon forever. When they were linked this way,
he felt whole in a way he had never experienced before. Qui-Gon
filled somehting in him that he never knew was empty.
It never could last though, the connection was too deep, too
powerful and the needs of their bodies too strong. Even Jedi
could only do so much. Obi-Wan pulled restlessly against the
bonds that held him, breaking them easily and dug his fingers
in Qui-Gon's long hair. He pulled the other man closer, their
movement taking on an almost desperate quality. He raked his
fingers down the other man's back before settling them on his
ass, trying to pull him closer even as he rose with every
thrust to meet Qui-Gon with equal force.
Qui-Gon responded to his touch by pounding into him with
greater force. The other man pulled his mouth away from
Obi-Wan's lips and fastened them onto his neck, sucking and
biting at the tender flesh. The sound of their heavy breathing
and the movement of skin against skin echoed in the room,
filling Obi-Wan ears until he was aware of nothing else.
/Now, come for me now./ Qui-Gon said urgently across their
bond.
/Yes./ It was right, nothing else in his life had ever been as
right as this. He lunged one final time against Qui-Gon, and
let go. A moment later he felt Qui-Gon shudder and felt through
their bond the other man gain his own release. They shared
their pleasure with each other, feeding the feelings and
sensations in an endless loop as they both drifted far from
consciousness.
Obi-Wan woke slowly, a heavy but welcome weight half resting
on his chest. He opened his eyes slowly, smiling at the picture
Qui-Gon created. His hair was strewn across them, his arms and
legs spread across the bed in a wanton sprawl. He'd never seen
the other man look so content or relaxed in all their time
together.
"How can I help but be relaxed in your company?" Qui-Gon asked
softly looking up at him, his blue eyes half lidded with sleep
and satisfaction.
Obi-Wan ran his hands through he other man's long hair bringing
some order to the long, flowing strands. He sighed in
contentment and a touch of melancholy. "We haven't resolved
anything."
"I know, but we don't need to right now. It will come to us
when it is needful for us to know. Until then what is the point
of worrying?"
Obi-Wan smiled and kissed Qui-Gon's forehead, settling more
comfortably with him. "I suppose you're right."
Qui-Gon patted his thigh familiarly. "We'll figure something
out, love. We always do."
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